Iwata: “As a proud member of the Nintendo franchise, I can’t die without doing anything! This is my final console! It’s the gamer’s spirit!”

Critics: “He used the last of his hype to create a console for his fans. [about to type salty rant] …I won’t bash it. Not because I’m sentimental. Purely out of respect for a worthy game creator. I shall never forget you, Satoru Iwata: A man whose life was as understanding and indomitable as Nintendium.”