JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Cheated by fate

Stop kinkshaming, man.

Kira… you had your opportunity, buddy.

You murdered who knows how many people and were confronted by the strongest man on the planet. Not only did you live, not only did you get away but you also got away with a new face and identity. Not only did you get away with a new face and identity, but you were making that like /work/. A wife who adored you for everything but your murdering, a steady job, a nice house and a kid that wasn't yours but really, is a lot like you when you think about it.

But, and this part's key…. YOU COULDN'T STOP MURDERING PEOPLE!

You know what the gang would've said to Hayato if he just came to them with baseless speculation about how his dad's acting weird and his mom is suddenly interested in him again? They'd probably right it off as a mid-life crisis that a kid just really doesn't understand. All you had to do was NOT KILL PEOPLE and fate would've totally let you off the hook and given you a smoking wife to boot.

But you couldn't, because dead women hands gives you a boner.

That is why fate has decided to slap your shit.

Fuck you Kira.