I think Jack and Ashi are perfect for each other for three key reasons:

1. Ashi is Jack's equal in terms of strength and battle experience, being able to take on an army without an issue and perfectly backed him up when fighting Lazarus. Jack doesn't want a weak girl to settle down with because there's always the chance she'd be kidnapped or killed to get even with Jack, so anything weaker than Jack is a no-go.

2. Ashi and Jack are almost identical in every way. Both were trained from a young age to be the very best and to defeat that person's mortal enemy. Both are lost and confused about the world around them, from the technological wonders around them, the people and cultures. Both are lost in darkness, whether it be Jack's guilt and depression or Ashi fighting for an evil cause she didn't know was evil, and the opposite person saved them from that darkness. And they can both jump good :)

3. Ashi just might be what Jack needs to defeat Aku. When Jack's father defeated Aku, it wasn't out of honour, duty or revenge, it was to protect his wife and child from harm from Aku's evil, and he succeeded. Jack did have his mother and father to protect which is how he was able to defeat him momentarily, but in the future, who else does Jack have? Being in love with Ashi will give Jack something to fight for, that reason to keep lifting his sword and that reason to finally defeat Aku for good.

All that and they just look really cute together :3

"RIP Samurai Jack's marriage to Johnny Bravo."

Finally, at least someone is making sense here. If anything, that's the worst thing about this. Just… poor Johnny…