Scottish Pokémon Trainer - Scottish Pokemon trainer drunk

"I'd tell ya focken whot mate if dees feckin monehbags corp'ritt conts don maek me a focken Scotti's lass in tha' dayum Chinese kartoon an' not some focken wee 'Merican cont, I'll be finnin eveh onnodem an peggin each o' dem in their tiny focken arses! I cannae tell ya how man'eh focken taims I see a wee lass go ein to the stoodio and try aut for a role onleh to be tossed aut by a feckin' pins ein needles high pitched as fock girleh girl from 'Merica! It's liek they donnae kno' what the fock they're doin' when designin' voices. It's like they think all us wee lasses speak alike -- and well do ai have som' focken news for theim!"

Words of wisdom, I think.

"Drunk"
As opposed to…?