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Grond - Virgin vs. Chad

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Chad GROND VIRGIN SIEGE LASER Kills scores of Gondorian guards when he busts F---- all the orcish cheerleaders a nut through their gates when he's done FIRES ONLY ONE SHOT, ONLY HITS A DILAPIDATED DOOR GROND! GROND! GROND! GROND! NEEDS TO REST AFTER FIRING EVERY SHOT, HIGH REFRACTORY PERIOD GROND! GROND! GROND! HAS TO BE TOWED INTO BATTLE BY TUGS, TOO FAT TO MOVE ON HIS OWN POWER NEEDS VEHICLES TO DEFEND HIM FROM A GROUP OF Ores sing his name, striking fear into the hearts of every man woman and child 10 REBELS ARMED WITH STICKS, STILL LOSES Has a proud heritage of man killing IS THE RETARDED COUSIN OF THE DEATH STAR Can move himself through the sheer power of his anger, but lets his fans feel like they're helping Has no equal in middle earth or any other realm

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