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FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2012 The tragedy of the mid-witted It is truly remarkable what the moderately intelligent consider to be markers of superior intelligence: I was a terrific little snob who thought she knew everything, and subsequently, I was about to learn a great deal. As soon as I started, I realized I had no idea what I was doing. Fortunately, the other cocktail waitresses were quick to make suggestions. My first night on the job, a fellow shot girl offered practical advice. “You have to be a little cold," she explained. “Make them feel like you're doing them a favor by letting them buy shots." But it's difficult to maintain a Queen of Sheba demeanor while trying to rub globs of green glitter out of your eyes. Instead I became a level of friendly you typically only see at Disneyland, if Disneyland reeked of vomit and spilled appletinis. I doled out shots as people in cartoon costumes offer hugs. The manager would point out that I wasn't being sexy enough, which was surprising, because I was wearing 6-inch heels and less clothing than I ever had. It quickly became clear that I was not the first literate person to don a miniskirt. Sometime during that first week, I was hiding in the backroom reading Margaret Atwood. I was sitting on the counter next to baskets of party mix because my feet hurt, which they did for the entirety of my shot-selling career. One cocktail waitress swept in, asked what I thought of Atwood's novel “Oryx and Crake," did a tricky little analysis where she compared it to "The Handmaid's Tale," mentioned some other female dystopian writers l'd never heard of, and then went out balancing a tray of shots on one hand. As ridiculous as it sounds, that was the first time I became aware that clever people are buried in every nook and cranny of life. It is astonishing that no one pointed this out to me sooner. As we often see on this blog, those who possess above-average intelligence and trouble to occasionally read newspapers and magazines tend to genuinely be under the erroneous impression that they possess superlative intelligence. But while having an IQ between one and two standard deviations above the norm is unusual, it is hardly rare, and in historical terms it is distinctly pedestrian.

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Origin Entry: IQ Bell Curve / Midwit

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