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| Anonymous 01/07/19(Mon)21:04:19 No.789381010 Well guys, this is it. >be me >high school graduate >parents are done with my lazy presence around the house 110 KB JPG >tell me to get a job, but are nice about it >l understand their concern about me growing up >19th birthday is later this month >I think long and hard one night >fuckit.jpg >go to bed early, wake up early >make myself presentable to the outside world >go to local safeway >ask assistant manager about any positions >she asks for my information to give me a call later >2 hours later I get a call >interviewconfirmed.exe >wake up supremely early next morning >walk to safeway for interview and sign papers >I'm going to work as a produce clerk next week

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Some men just want to watch the world burn | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Movie idea 07/29/21(Thu)13:47:06 No.154240634 >aliens come to earth >tell humanity that it must choose one of its races to be eliminated before they share their knowledge and tech >a worldwide anonymous poll is held where you just have to think of which race to get rid of (none is 20 KB JPG an option as well) >plot twist: as the poll ends everyone who voted for a certain race gets a corresponding symbol tattooed on their face >aliens instantly leave without purging anyone or saying a word >chaos ensues

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Anon’s had a dog. | /r/Greentext

:Anonymous 01/08/19(Tue)03:17:42 No.789437326 >be me at age 11 >have dog >cool guy >love dog >dog licks my face constantly >feelsgood.jpg >makes me feel like someone 305 KB PNG actually gives a f--- about me >he doesn't lick anyone else like that so I think I'm his favorite person >one day I look out at him in the back yard through a window >see him eat an entire pile of s--- >mfw I realize why there's never dog s--- in the yard >mfw when he's been eating doodoo and licking my face >mfw when he's probably doing it just to spite me Felt bad.

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Anon sells socks | /r/Greentext

>be me >18, f >broke uni student >make a joke about selling used socks to a friend online >start getting random dms asking for prices >play along to see how much these weirdos would pay >end up selling a pair to a guy for 50 quid >sell them to him and one other guy every month 41.9 kB JPG >never thought my life would come to this >selling my used socks is my only source of income >l hate my life

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being smart feels good | /r/Greentext

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this greentext was posted here ~3 years ago, i'm trying to find the original post | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Thu 14 Feb 2019 18:21:29 No.792652482 View Reply Original Report Quoted By: >>792652550 >>792652745 >>792652759 >>792652884 >>792652939 >>792654264 >>79265 >senior year of high school >best friend kills herself >teacher announces it to class >everyone pretends to be sad for 15 minutes >that's it >ffw few months >stacy kills herself >school holds some big "in memorium" s--- in the gym >counseling services get offered to help deal with this tradgic loss >big anti-bullying campaign gets launched >what the f--- 25KİB, 474x459, .jpg >ffw few more months View >yearbook comes out Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO >flippinghrough, see big 2 page spread dedicated to stacy complete with s----- poetry >all my best friend ever got was her name in the "not pictured" section life is so unfair, bros

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Anon reports animal abuse | /r/Greentext

>go on date last night with a girl I met through bumble >she picked the spot >sit down and start making small talk but then she goes quiet looking at the menu 3.58 MB GIF >she says she can't eat anything except a salad >breaks the news she is a vegan >she immediately starts getting bitchy about the place not having options to accommodate her You picked this place dumbass >told her I can ask if the chef will make something >chef offers to make stuffed pepper with rice and vegetables >she agrees >talks resume as she seems calm now F------ finally >she says she has a dog >dog is on a vegan diet thatsabuse.png >immediately ask for the check >tell her it isn't working out so I paid for an entree I didn't even get >wish her best of luck but she quietly called me an a------ >walked out and immediately reported her for animal abuse Why is everyone on a dating app a f------ psychopath or someone who thinks they're a better catch than they really are? F--- this.

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Ohhhhhh ok | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/30/21(Sun)21:40:22 No.63926240 >At Barnes and Noble >Walk up behind girl and put my hand on her shoulder "Beth?" >She turns around confused >Apologize and tell her she looked like my dead sister >See she is looking at Nichijou 15 KB JPG "Hey the anime for that is pretty funny, have you seen it?" >She still seems confused >We'll definitely have to discuss it over lunch sometime >Give her a note with my snapchat on it and walk away >mfw she adds me >mfw when we're getting lunch tomorrow >mfw when she confused my autistic scheme for confidence or something 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 05/30/21(Sun)23:14:55 No.63927288 THE EYE MAN ALSEAL >>63926240 (OP) # I'm both disgusted and amazed. Well played anon 373 KB PNG : Anonymous 05/30/21(Sun)23:16:09 No.63927300 >>63926240 (OP) # What a play bro. Congrats, you're gonna make it.

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Anon has health class | /r/Greentext

> be me > in health class, have to make a powerpoint about why alcohol is bad 359 KB PNG > 12th grade so no one cares > presentation day comes along > no one has done any work > teacher opens up class file > one project > titled "alachol" > teacher walks out of room > mfw

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Anon Wakes Up | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/15/22(Sat)15:19:16 No.870735033 >Australia had a rabbit plague in the mid 1800s >They tried a variety of methods to get rid of them >Eventually they got desperate, and switched to the unconventional 13 KB GIF >They made fake rabbits that were more attractive than the real rabbits >The ones attracted to the fake rabbits didn't breed and the population was thus reduced >Tfw they're doing it with people now >Tfw I figured out why Anime girls exist The scary part is from what l've seen, it's working.

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Anon lives in Alabama. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/08/19(Tue)13:26:09 No.50311760 >be me, 10 >6/10 beta f-- >nice to everyone for no f------ Reason >dad got remarried to a single mom with 15/10 daughter >gets crush on her >masturbate thinking about her 28 KB PNG everyday >obviously into step sister p--- >gets really close to her and help her in everything >gets to accidentally touch her here and there (I am actually very clumsy) >last week she texts me to pick her up from her friend's house party because she's drunk AF >bring her home >carry her somehow to her room >she tells that she actually likes me >l am like yeah I like you too >she says no really I like you >and then she starts kissing me >Then we have sex >lost_virginity.jpeg >sex was amature AF >go to my room afterwards >think about it all night and J------- more >gets paranoid because she might think I took advantage of her and tell it to my father and her mother >OhShit.png >next day >she says she likes it >had sex 3 times since then But now I don't know what to do, because this relationship has no future. 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 01/08/19(Tue)13:27:48 No.50311781 >>50311760 (OP) # I am 18 not 10. That was a typo. And she's 19

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Anon likes pee | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/31/18(Mon)14:51:04 No.20187725 I want a car previously owned by a cute teenaged girl with a very weak bladder. The more times she's peed in the seat, the better. The humiliation and 49 KB JPG embarassment she felt during those leaky moments would make the smell even more potent. Can you guys help me find my dream car? >>20187950 # >>20188103 # Anonymous 12/31/18(Mon)15:54:40 No.20187950 >>20187725 # f------ weebs

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Anon doesnt like his milk | /r/Greentext

6 Anonymous | 50270150 Vor 1 Std. .. ITT: Autistic s--- you did as a child >be me in elementary school >always get chocolate milk >one day they're out of chocolate >get strawberry instead, pleasantly surprised >strawberry has pink carton >chocolate has brown carton 146,1 kB JPG >get the green carton of milk the next day >think it will be green flavored >it's just f----- normal-ass milk >get mad >dump milk onto the kid sitting next to me and kick him out of his chair (with my foot) that kid died of a heroin overdose last year

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Greentext Stories - Anon loses his neethood | /r/Greentext

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| Anonymous 01/07/19(Mon)21:04:19 No.789381010 Well guys, this is it. >be me >high school graduate >parents are done with my lazy presence around the house 110 KB JPG >tell me to get a job, but are nice about it >l understand their concern about me growing up >19th birthday is later this month >I think long and hard one night >fuckit.jpg >go to bed early, wake up early >make myself presentable to the outside world >go to local safeway >ask assistant manager about any positions >she asks for my information to give me a call later >2 hours later I get a call >interviewconfirmed.exe >wake up supremely early next morning >walk to safeway for interview and sign papers >I'm going to work as a produce clerk next week

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