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: Anonymous 12/18/21(Sat)09:53:11 No.868814404 >dates a girl for 3 months >she's really cool, we have similar interests and sense of humor >finally going to have sex with her >unzip my pants >"What is that thing? What do you I ant 21 KB JPG expect me to do with that?" >w-what? >"It's like a third arm. I don't have room for that." >she leaves my apartment >we text later, says she had an ex that tore her vag with her d--- >apparently, he was "big" but still not as "big" as me (I'm a little over 7 and a half inches, about 6 inches thick) >now she's afraid of large d---- >she apologizes and says we aren't compatible >we agree to break up >feelsbadman >over the next two days, get texts from three of cousin (all female) to hookup her frie an >feelsbetterman

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File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie

Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

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Imbalance of Power | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/11/22(Mon)23:26:04 No.68180721 >lesbian uses dildo daily >no problem, she's still a lesbian >i, a straight man use a dildo once >im immediately called gay what is this double standard 13 KB JPG : Anonymous 04/11/22(Mon)23:27:35 No.68180739 >>68180721 (OP) # well we already knew the woman was gay.

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again not >greentext but another story I found last night, what do you guys think of this story? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/11/22(Mon)02:55:55 No.876064561 >>876063202 # OK here's a true story... I was smoking a c-------- outside a bar with a friend and the black manager came outside and told me to move away, I said this is a public area, I'm just taking to my friend. The black manager went straight into fight mode and started yelling at us to move away, but it was a public area.. He didn't own the area nor the bar. So I told him again, we're just talking and will move away in 5 minutes after our discussion, yet his authority and masculinity was insulted. So he grabbed me by the throat and pushed me about 10foot into the air and i landed on my back, my head was bleeding from the fall. So I called the police for being assaulted in a public place.. He told the police I was calling him a n-----.. So the police arrested me and held me in a cell over night, adding disorderly behaviour to my record. He got away with assaulting me and I got a criminal record... You ask me why I'm racist???

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Anon caught his brother red handed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/12/22(Tue)02:45:27 No.68178271 >be me college student >all i do is study, eat, beat my meat, sleep repeat >decide to get a new hobby >start to learn how to draw >after a few weeks i start to get 501 KB JPG better >keep secret from everyone >ffw few months >doing art commisions & managed to get a nice amount of $ >go to take a s--- >accidentaly leave my latop on >came back seeing my little brother looking at my male x male art folder >we lock eyes >not only that but i could see his boner popping through his pj >told him not to tell anybody about it >he leaves w/o saying anything What should I do? We also share the same bed

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Anon was playing vidya | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/11/22(Mon)20:13:52 No.876123891 >be me some time ago >playing vidya >Suddenly get a persistent and inexplicable desire to find a loving wife and have children who look up 63 KB JPG to me A few days ago I wasn't even thinking about any of this. What the f--- is happening to me?

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Anon’s ultimate move | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/11/22(Mon)22:54:04 No.129908869 >summon blue eyes abyss dragon >then have sex with it >end my turn

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Anon loses | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous = 04/11/22(Mon)00:52:08 No.68165617 >Be me, 26, khv >Best friend is a l----- >Playing vidya at her place couple days ago >Moment of stupidity/bravery >Offer a bet >If I win, she gives me a b------, if 67 KB JPG she wins, I'll give her an IOU >She actually agrees >Try super hard, wins >She doesn't back out >Literally googles how to give a bj >Whatever, itshappening >Feels good, but not that good >C-- in like two minutes >She makes a face >Takes a drink, returns to vidya with no further comment >Oh >Feel incredibly empty >Play a few more rounds then make excuse to leave F---. What the hell did I expect? : Anonymous 04/11/22(Mon)00:57:22 No.68165691 : Anonymous 04/11/22(Mon)01:08:12 No.68165809 she probably thought it would be more comedic than it actually was, but when you sat there autistically getting your d--- sucked without playing up the irony it became weird and unfunny. I think the relationship is over.

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Anon is French | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: dq5SZ7Qc Help 04/11/22(Mon)19:43:28 No.372385176 4894924C-4FCD-4410-9199-C5D7A5CEDB14.jpg 49 KB JPG >be me >French >It's election time and we have two choices >Option A: Marine Le Pen, a far-right nationalistic a------ >Option B: Macron who is Macron Soon we will have to choose one of them to be in charge of all of France for the next 5 years

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Anon has a lot of chromosomes | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/15/19(Sun)23:13:04 No.53625789 why is my weight in Ibs higher than kg? A lot of the strong guys at my gym have high kgs. Any way to raise my kg and lower my Ib? 9 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/15/19(Sun)23:14:00 No.53625803 -ID te.e>>53625789 (OP) # R(R e, 50 KB JPG

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Anon is... Or is he | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 791795067 25 min. ago >be me >or not be me pic related 193.2 kB PNG

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Anon goes to Reddit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous rlgreentext is cancer 04/11/22(Mon)22:21:56 No.68175360 as someone who lurks on reddit subs ive noticed soemthings >be me >go on r/greentext >see post about f----- complaining 136 KB JPG about his 41% transformer brother who became a "woman" >go to comments expecting normal funny trany h8 >see comments making fun of t----- get downvoted >see comments from f----- reddit addicts with pink haired avatars correcting people who rightfully call anon's brother a guy >upvoted in the hundreds vs r/4chan >based >hateful >way more funny comments >less reddit f------ >less f*males >reddit mods heavily monitor it i f------ hate reddit i only use it for p--- anymore its just a liberal echochamber pic unrelated

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anon gives advice | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous How to tell if a girl likes yo(...) 11/04/21(Thu)12:01:13 No.66022787 Rule of thumb: if you can't tell that she likes you, she probably doesn't. Prerequisites - These signs alone don't necessarily mean that she likes you, but if she's not doing these, it's highly unlikely that she does. 100 KB JPG >eye contact, smiling >making an effort to carry the conversation >remembering and paying attention to the things you say >complimenting you when the opportunity arises >comforting you if things are going wrong Signs of attraction These are some good signs that she does like you but every girl is different. Weigh your odds. The more signs the merrier. >texting you constantly and on her own initiative >frequent use of emojis >drawn-out texting; i.e. "Hii!", ":)))" >double texting >making excuses to be around you; i.e. "I'm just getting a drink of water if you wanna come with me!", "Maybe I can show you around my college sometime!", etc. >making excuses to touch you; i.e. touching you on the shoulder, holding your hand, giving you a hug goodbye, etc. >sitting with her legs crossed towards you >sitting with her knees up and pointed towards you >positioning herself close to you >saying emotionally intimate things; i.e. "I trust you.", "I can't wait to see you!", etc. There are more signs but remember that girls aren't attracted to the majority of guys and they're horrible at hiding when they are attracted to one. No, she's not just shy, and no, she's not just waiting for you to make the first move. She just doesn't like you.

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Anon’s dad is a bro | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/11/22(Mon)23:15:54 No.129909308 random memory I remembered today >2004 >be 7 >mom is strict so I must go to sleep at 9pm even during summer holiday >her aunt passes away, she goes to the funeral and is only back by morning >want to see Shrek 2 in cinema >check cinema schedule >go to 6pm one with dad >accidentally checked yesterday's schedule, film started at 5pm with the next one starting at 8:30pm >upset.png >dad says he buys two tickets for the 8:30pm Shrek 2 >surprised.jpg >he says mom doesn't need to know, it'll be our secret >movie ended at 10:30pm >when we went home dad let me play Tony Hawk's Underground 'til 1 am

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Greentext Stories - I'm sure redditors can relate to anon's situation | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous 12/18/21(Sat)09:53:11 No.868814404 >dates a girl for 3 months >she's really cool, we have similar interests and sense of humor >finally going to have sex with her >unzip my pants >"What is that thing? What do you I ant 21 KB JPG expect me to do with that?" >w-what? >"It's like a third arm. I don't have room for that." >she leaves my apartment >we text later, says she had an ex that tore her vag with her d--- >apparently, he was "big" but still not as "big" as me (I'm a little over 7 and a half inches, about 6 inches thick) >now she's afraid of large d---- >she apologizes and says we aren't compatible >we agree to break up >feelsbadman >over the next two days, get texts from three of cousin (all female) to hookup her frie an >feelsbetterman

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