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Anonymous 08/02/22(Tue)21:58:00 No.2440357 up on me >oh well >be me >sophomore in college >get idea to piss in milk jug >make all visitors to apartment help me fill it. Roommates get on board. >everyone happily obliges (dudes) 49 KB JPG >fill gallon pretty quickly >whatnow.jpg >call local newspapers - city and college >ask advertising section if I can run a classified ad selling "1 gallon fresh urine" >girl on phone asks editor and then pretty much hangs >debate with roommates what to do with it >no one knows >decide to just leave it on porch >Texas heat during summer >stays on porch for over a month >word spreads and entire apartment complex knows about it >one day notice that it's leaking through the bottom with a small trickle >the urine is dissolving the plastic >decide something must be done soon >drop it off of our 3rd floor balcony >jug explodes and urine splashes in the grass in about a 10 foot radius >underwhelming >about to go back inside >see downstairs neighbor talking to her boyfriend in the parking lot 30 feet from where we dropped it >about to yell "hey we dropped that jug of urine just now" >before I can get the words out a look of death appears in her boyfriend's face >immediately rolls up window without even saying bye to his girlfriend >drives off >at that exact moment the girl spins around and sprints into her apartment running no less than 5 feet from where we dropped the jug >smell has now wafted upwards to where we were standing >HOLY F------ S--- I HAVE NEVER SMELLED ANYTHING LIKE THIS IN MY LIFE >about to turn around and run inside >notice my good friend at the building that's about 50 yards away from our apartment >checking oil in his truck >wind takes smell towards him >suddenly yanks his head out from under his hood >has grimace in his face like he has seen death >immediately sprints into his apartment leaving his hood up >I laugh so hard I cry >neighbors talk about the story of the piss jug for days >One of my favorite memories from college >>2440364 # >>2440375 # >>2440412 # >>2441928 # >>2442312 # >>2446106 #

anon has a jug | /r/Greentext


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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack
Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #
34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps
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Anonymous 08/02/22(Tue)21:58:00 No.2440357 up on me >oh well >be me >sophomore in college >get idea to piss in milk jug >make all visitors to apartment help me fill it. Roommates get on board. >everyone happily obliges (dudes) 49 KB JPG >fill gallon pretty quickly >whatnow.jpg >call local newspapers - city and college >ask advertising section if I can run a classified ad selling "1 gallon fresh urine" >girl on phone asks editor and then pretty much hangs >debate with roommates what to do with it >no one knows >decide to just leave it on porch >Texas heat during summer >stays on porch for over a month >word spreads and entire apartment complex knows about it >one day notice that it's leaking through the bottom with a small trickle >the urine is dissolving the plastic >decide something must be done soon >drop it off of our 3rd floor balcony >jug explodes and urine splashes in the grass in about a 10 foot radius >underwhelming >about to go back inside >see downstairs neighbor talking to her boyfriend in the parking lot 30 feet from where we dropped it >about to yell "hey we dropped that jug of urine just now" >before I can get the words out a look of death appears in her boyfriend's face >immediately rolls up window without even saying bye to his girlfriend >drives off >at that exact moment the girl spins around and sprints into her apartment running no less than 5 feet from where we dropped the jug >smell has now wafted upwards to where we were standing >HOLY F------ S--- I HAVE NEVER SMELLED ANYTHING LIKE THIS IN MY LIFE >about to turn around and run inside >notice my good friend at the building that's about 50 yards away from our apartment >checking oil in his truck >wind takes smell towards him >suddenly yanks his head out from under his hood >has grimace in his face like he has seen death >immediately sprints into his apartment leaving his hood up >I laugh so hard I cry >neighbors talk about the story of the piss jug for days >One of my favorite memories from college >>2440364 # >>2440375 # >>2440412 # >>2441928 # >>2442312 # >>2446106 #

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Uploaded Aug 13, 2022 at 01:25PM EDT

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Greentext Stories

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Reddit

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reddit, greentext, greentext memes, 4chan, 4chan memes, /r/greentext, font, material property

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