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: Anonymous >Be me, bored Anon >Decide to create Reddit account dedicated to shitposting greentexts >Call myself the Green TextKing >Amass 450k of karma >It was almost all fake and gay >Thought it was funny to make a Reddit user whose entire identity is shitposting greentexts. >The only real s--- was my tard wrangler stories. >Only identifying details for operational security. Can't lose normie job. I have to be able to afford my KING 12/16/22(Fri)11:22:39 No.890853539 577 KB PNG degenerate life of s--- tier chicken wings and beer >Decide to come back because I still have tard wrangler stories to tell >Be me, 30 year old tard wrangler and prolific s--- poster

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File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie

Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

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Anon notices a mistake | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 45 KB JPG 12/14/22(Wed)23:29:21 No.177907579 ITT: inaccurate movie details that make the film unwatchable >at 50:35 in "It" (2017) a LEGO model with lime parts is dropped. 2x2 slopes in lime were not released until 2010. "It" is set in 1989.

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father and daughter bonding | /r/Greentext

[Advertise on 4chan] [Index] [Catalog] [Bottom] 1382221398559.jpg (85 KB, 612x612) google yandex iqdb wait Imagine the following Anonymous 12/15/22(Thu)19:19:16 No.28774584 >be mtf >you come out to parents >your mom is completely unaccepting, misgenders you all the time >figure it's just typical boomershit and shrug it off >one day, during a particularly heated argument, she snaps >"why are you throwing away your perfectly good body? I would f------ kill to be a man" >she freezes, realizing what she just admitted to How do you respond?

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Anon doesnt understand women | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/16/22(Fri)09:36:22 No.71421148 132 KB PNG >Be me >See girl I know carrying her cat, Nook >"Hi Anon. I was just at vet, Nook was getting big so I wanted to see what was wrong." Nook is fat as f--- and looks high >"Anon, can you believe it? They charged me $100 just for a check up and some test! In the end the vet just told me nothing was wrong with Nook. He was just fat and needed to lose weight." I laugh >"You should taken the cat to me. I would have told you the same thing but for free!" Laugh more >Girl gets upset and storms off >Doesnt speak to me for months Why are women like this?

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He probably lost all his bank along with gamestop stocks | /r/Greentext

File: 1395093168358.png-(305 KB, 495x470, 1394387815629.png) First National Bank of Gamestop Anonymous 03/17/14(Mon)14:52 UTC-7 No.235956257 Replies: >>235956687 >>235956926 >>235956992 >>235957246 Does anyone else use Gamestop as a bank? I got really p----- off with US Bank because I kept overdrafting my account even though I opted out, and the same thing happened with my credit union when I got a debit card. Now whenever I get paid I go preorder a whole shitload of games. Whenever I need money, I go to the nearest gamestop and ask for my money back on a game I don't want and make a withdrawal. The lines are shorter at gamestop than at the bank and I can trade in old games and have money go straight to my savings account. Gamestops are just as prevalent as banks in my town and I work at a mall so it's even more convenient than running an errand to the bank or using an ATM and getting charged. The gamestop people are starting to catch on that I'm just moving money around and only buying one preordered game a year, if that, but there isn't s--- they can do about it. The best part is, since I always preorder every game coming out I'm still guaranteed to get all the exclusive content whether or not I'm sure I want a certain game. It's like they're rewarding me for banking with them. Anonymous 03/17/14(Mon)14:56 UTC-7 No.235956687 Replies: >>235957157 >>235956257 (OP) I can't decide if you're retarded or brilliant.

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Anon impresses his female coworker | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 410 KB PNG 12/15/22(Thu)08:57:23 >Be me, wage cuck at office job >Mostly work with women but theyre all old >Get s--- on because I'm bottom of the ladder, but work harder than anyone else. >New employee shows up >She's a qt and around my age No.71407948 >Im made to show her the ropes H-------- this is my chance. >We start chating and shooting the s--- >Politics is brought up F--- dont screw this up >Mention something stupid about how most politicans are great at lying. >"Oh so you read the papers too, Anon?" >"Uh-h, yeah sure" She's visibly impressed Turns out the mayor was caught doing some illegal s--- and caught lying about it. Qt girl is big into politics and reads the papers religiously. She now thinks I'm an intellectual like her. Despite me really being a black pilled wage cuck. I dont know how long I can keep the charade up.

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Anon preaches fat acceptance | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 95 KB JPG 12/16/22(Fri)13:47:55 No.621374951 >tfw you realize Big Smoke's Cluckin' Bell order really wasn't that large since he's also ordering for CJ, Ryder and Sweet

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Anon is a femboy | /r/Greentext

File: flat,800x800,075,f.jpg (44 KB, 550x452) haha weed Anonymous 12/16/22(Fri)03:18:44 No.28777596 oh yeah i dun f----- up good this time >be me, male, 20 >bi as hell and massive femboy >have a cute bear bf who's a whole generation older than me (it's important later trust) >a few hours ago >done with school so decide to take a weed edible to celebrate >get on and play games with my bf and the crew >oshit.jpg the high's kickin in >kinda took a bit too much but idk because high sex is f------ amazing >seduce the bf with some cute fem clothes, probably fumble awkwardly over words cause i'm f------ stoned >riding, letsafuckingo.wav >randomly remember that one audio clip of the girl saying "f--- my ass and call me obama" >start giggling uncontrollably >bf slaps my ass and goes "what's so funny huh?" >i literally cannot stop myself >as loud as i can i moan >"F--- MY ASS AND CALL ME OBAMA~" >pure horror on the bf's face >he literally GRABS me to stop me and is like anon w-- did you just say >i am dying laughing >he plops me down on the bed and leaves the bedroom welp that was fun while it lasted

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Anons took the redpill about Star Wars | /r/Greentext

They fight for kids cutting their genitals and having sex with aliens Star Wars in a nutshell Anonymous 12/15/22(Thu)11:10:16 No.177913773 ► >>177914014>>177914082 >>177914246 >>177914258 >>177914281 >>177914430 >>17791443 How can you be unironically anti-Empire? Anonymous 12/15/22(Thu)12:21:13 No. 177915079 ► File: Cw1LxcxXgAAA-fX.jpg (74 KB, 624x391) >Driving home from work >Some fat balding neckbeard soiboy in front of me has a Resistance decal from the new movies on his back windshield >"Die, Rebel SCUM!" >He looks visibly hurt >I laugh >Pull up next to him at the light >Give him the finger with my Darth Vader watch clearly visible >Light turns green >Peel out and drive off Rebelfags suck cocks Anonymous 12/15/22(Thu)12:55:46 No.177915722 ► >>177922183 >>177914082 >>177918328 They fight for kids having a secure youth and becoming good human parents/citizens in the future >>177914014 >George Lucas was a hippie >he said since day 1 that Str Wars a critic of Nixon/Reagan's America >"Hollywood is run by white slavers" - George Lucas, this century >he literally support the SJW narrative of Disney's Star Wars >Star Wars is still producing content today ☐ Anonymous 12/15/22(Thu)14:55:11 No.177918486 ► >>177920551 >yuuzhan vong exists >Palp created the definitive army to protect the Galaxy >Mon Mothma and her New Republic (of Weimar in Space) dismantle the army and big guns >yuuzhan vong destroy 80% of the Galaxy >women ruin everything >Disney decanonised yuuzhan vong >realised that now they have a cartoon villain >recanonised yuuzhan vong as grysk hegemony, so the Empire doesn't look retard cartoonish af Palp, the Ultimate Patriot.

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is this really it | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/23/22(Wed)10:05:49 No.69038492 FC22C99A-3FC7-41 CA-954C-D6C0D11D912B.jpg >wake up >work >work out >go home >eat >go to bed is this really it 158 KB JPG

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Anon wants the clussy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/16/20(Wed)13:41:04 No.842420881 >be me >dating a clown bitch >ask her if shes horny >she honks her nose once for yes >go to bedroom 34 KB JPG >realize i am out of condoms >mfw she ties my d--- into a balloon animal so we don't have to worry about making any little circus freaks clown poon is best poon. Anonymous God I wish I could f--- clown girls. 12/16/20(Wed)13:42:42 No.842420977 : Anonymous >>842420881 (OP) # Tfw you will never have a clown gf that blows your d--- 4 ft long and wraps it into a giraffe 12/16/20(Wed)13:44:06 No.842421074

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anon is a refrigerator | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 375 KB PNG : Anonymous >>71281967 (OP) # >built like a fridge kek >>71282013 # 12/06/22(Tue)14:27:04 No.71281967 >6'2, built like a fridge >All my fantasies revolve around crossdressing, being feminized and cosplaying as my favorite anime girls men. >>71282013 # 12/06/22(Tue)14:29:11 No.71281980 : Anonymous >>71281967 (OP) # Why is it so often like this? 12/06/22(Tue)14:29:23 No.71281982 I think women, especially female teachers, target their emasculation efforts on masculine-looking boys and 12/06/22(Tue) 14:34:03 No.71282013 : Anonymous >>71281980 # I mean that my body is absolutely NOT built to look anywhere close to a femoids. >>71281982 # I've lived my entire 22 years of life in a s----- eastern european small town. I definitely wasn't groomed to be this way.

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Bats out of hell | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 2.4 MB JPG 12/15/22(Thu)20:33:59 No.71416679 >Buy a house in the suburbs >Build an around 30 foot tall hygieostatic bat roost, kinda like pic related >Put a flagpole on top flying a "Defund the HOA" flag illuminated by lamps at night >When the local HOA does get p-----, they can't do s--- about it because several species of bats are federally protected plus I can say it's natural pest control Thoughts? I also have plans on planting giant sequoia saplings in people's yards because, like bats, they are protected by law so the HOA and the homeowner watches over the years as a tree they can't remove slowly starts destroying their house. I just love the idea of being the radical environmentalist version of Bonnie and Clyde, going around pissing off HOAs across the country

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Greentext Stories - The Return of The Shit Post King | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous >Be me, bored Anon >Decide to create Reddit account dedicated to shitposting greentexts >Call myself the Green TextKing >Amass 450k of karma >It was almost all fake and gay >Thought it was funny to make a Reddit user whose entire identity is shitposting greentexts. >The only real s--- was my tard wrangler stories. >Only identifying details for operational security. Can't lose normie job. I have to be able to afford my KING 12/16/22(Fri)11:22:39 No.890853539 577 KB PNG degenerate life of s--- tier chicken wings and beer >Decide to come back because I still have tard wrangler stories to tell >Be me, 30 year old tard wrangler and prolific s--- poster

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