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: Anonymous 02/27/23(Mon)15:49:45 No.72383773 >be me >decide to finally go to gym for first time >feeling pumped, ready to get ripped >get there and realize I have no idea what to do 642 KB PNG >try to lift weights, end up dropping them on my foot >ouch.jpg >guy next to me laughs and says "first time, huh?" >try to play it cool and say "yeah, just warming up" >decide to try the treadmill instead >set it to max speed, feel like a boss >realize I don't know how to stop it >start flailing my arms like a maniac >finally manage to hit the emergency stop button >everyone in the gym is staring at me now >try to play it cool again and say "just testing the safety features" >decide I've had enough for one day and leave >realize I parked in the wrong spot and now my car has a boot on it >great first day at the gym

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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coworker hits on anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: r6w9IEZG) 05/04/12 (Fri)22:21:53 No.397680460 File: 1336184513.jpg-(53 KB, 400x400, 1331856759425.jpg) >Be 19 >working in s----- clothes store >6-7/10 female coworker hitting on me hardcore >I don't know how to deal with this. >Convince myself that she can't really be attracted to me. >She must be plotting something. >Want it to stop asap >Lie. Tell her I'm gay. >She stops hitting on me. >A day or so of peace. >Male coworker starts hitting on me. >mfw >God f------ damn it. >He still thinks we're dating. >Jokes on him. He's been putting his d--- in a straight man. >Lol f------.

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Anon's a schizo | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >>26425930 >Be me 13 10/15/20(Thu)08:03:25 No.26452956 (OP) # >Get up for a glass of water at 1am >Living room pitch black, except the glow from a dull yellow lamp >Hear a voice calling my name: "anon." and pausing before calling again: "anon." >Get a really weird sensation in my legs as I look around the room. >I think "ah man, the schizophrenia's kicking in" >"Anon." and I notice the voice is coming from outside the window >Walk over to the window, and the voice says "good night anon" >It was just my dad out in the yard looking at stars

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Goofball goals | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 29 KB JPG 02/24/23(Fri)21:37:53 No.72358252 >coworker's friend is a cutie 3.14 >Hang out with them for a while >One day friend told me that she called me a 'Goofy ass retard' what zone am I in?

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Anon wonders why Greta is so quiet | /r/Greentext

"We're Dying Slowly": East Palestine Residents Report Bizarre Health Issues After Toxic Train Derailment BY TYLER DURDEN 02/26/23(Sun)19:28:36 No.41776630 Residents of East Palestine, Ohio have been reporting bizarre symptoms following the Feb. 3 Norfolk Southern train derailment and subsequent toxic explosion, the NY Post reports. after-toxic-train Udklip.jpg 65 KB JPG https://www.zerohedge.com/medical/were-dying-slowly- east-palestine-residents-report-bizarre-health-issues- MONDAY, FEB 27, 2023-12:30 AM >"Doctors say I definitely have the chemicals in me but there's no one in town who can run the toxicological tests to find out which ones they are," said 40-year-old Wade Lovett, whose high-pitched voice now sounds as if he's been inhaling helium. >"My voice sounds like Mickey Mouse. My normal voice is low. It's hard to breathe, especially at night. My chest hurts so much at night I feel like I'm drowning. >"People are desperate right now. We're dying slowly. They're poisoning us slowly." >Be American >Gov blows up toxic chemicals in your town >Get told it's safe and effective >Get sick and die Is the US officially 3rd world country at this point? : Anonymous (ID: UarreqLx)= 02/26/23(Sun)19:32:32 No.417766666 >>417766305 (OP) # The far left has forfeited forever any moral high ground on the environment. >>417766771 # >>417767150 # >>417767252 # >>417767449 # >>417768120 # >>417768161 # >>417769827 # >>417769864 # >>417770981 # >>417773702 # >>417774458 # >>417774861 # >>417774912 # >>417775295 # >>417779774 # >>417779915 # >>417780129 # >>417780169 # >>417783894 # >>417784928 # >>417786591 # >>417787087 # >>417787181 # >>417791053 #

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Unironically based | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: tJBordXJ) Sheboon Drives Into a Popeye's(...) 02/26/23(Sun)19:15:11 No.417764990 Popeyes LOUISIANA NIFE KITCHEN DF5B30F7-CB51-400A-A98D-2BC8E51191C6.png 1.35 MB PNG HEY WHERE MY MUHFUGGIN BISCUITS N----?? I WANT MAH F---'N BISCUITS N----, F--- YALL RACISS AZZ N----- AND CRACKAS, GIMME DAT BISCUIT!!! DATS IT! *VROOM VROOM* *BANG!* >Augusta woman drives SUV into Popeyes over missing biscuits >A Popeye's customer is accused of ramming her vehicle into the fast-food restaurant because her order didn't have biscuits. >Belinda Miller, 50, of Augusta, was charged Wednesday with aggravated assault and criminal damage to property in the first degree. >And this isn't the first time she has rammed a building with the same vehicle.

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Not safe anywhere | /r/Greentext

E Anonymous (ID: xrZrIXAP A man ate a rack of ribs next (...) Tappiness 02/26/23(Sun)20:08:36 No.417770185 NYPICHPDPICT000007195476.jpg 353 KB JPG >A woman trapped on a crowded plane next to a passenger consuming an entire tray of barbecue took to social media earlier this week to vent her frustration. The sticky situation has ignited yet another debate about airplane etiquette, as travelers struggle to cope in an era where the sky appears to be the limit when it comes to in- flight idiocy. >Fed-up flier Lanna Tolland, from Glasgow, Scotland, found herself in the middle of a global food fight after the Twitter user unloaded on her few hundred followers. >"No chance is the guy next to me eating a full rack of ribs plus sides on this plane," Tolland said, fuming, providing damning photo evidence in a post that has already received 5.5 million views. ryanair-flight/ https://nypost.com/2023/02/24/man-eats-rack-of-ribs-on- Anonymous (ID: b9jX2QmF) 02/26/23(Sun)20:09:48 No.417770311 front page news in america, twitter posts >>417775664 # >>417778478 # >>417778602 # Anonymous (ID: RCOMjO68) >>417772928 # >>417773834 # 02/26/23(Sun)20:10:11 No.417770337 the last place I'd ever want to eat anything is a plane Anonymous (ID: 150dDxhm) 3 02/26/23(Sun)20:10:21 No.417770354 >>417770185 (OP) # HELP THERES A MAN EATING DINNER NEXT TO ME! SEX CRIME, SEX CRIME! IM A LITERAL UNDERAGE 25 YEAR OLD YOU CREEP >>417770509 # >>417773022 # >>417776412 # >>417779049 #

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Anon observes the effects of women on men. | /r/Greentext

File: 803.gif (1.42 MB, 320x240) ☐ Anonymous 02/25/23(Sat)01:44:35 No.72359228 [Reply] >hey anon check out my gf isn't she so cool >sorry you're single bro >hey anon we're getting married you should come watch >hey anon we're having triplets aren't you happy for me >anon... she left me, and she took the kids >and my car, and my house >you should be glad you're single, anon

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Anon is HummingbirdPilled | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >>65804999 (OP) # i usually add a scoop of sugar to my water bottle makes the day a little more sweet :) 10/17/21(Sun)23:14:15 No.65805240 PENNINGTON Provia

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Really activates your almonds | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: I/WcN8Ld) 34 KB JPG 02/26/23(Sun)18:26:42 No.417760470 I do not understand the phenomenon of s------- on white people 24/7 and then being outraged when they want to leave or form white-only communities : Anonymous (ID: FUAYerCD) >>417761268 # 02/26/23(Sun)18:27:23 No.417760535 >>417760470 (OP) # they hate whites so anything whites do is bad

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>tfw no mommy gf | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 59568680 >be 21 >girlfriend is 28 >big milkers and a fit round ass >she is very mature >well off with money >got with her when I was 18 >she helped pay for my college >let me move in with her, no rent >cooks for me >lets me call her mommy Hace 1 h.. >sex is amazing >even when she's not in the mood for sex she takes care of me >gives long sloppy b------- >lets me suck her t--- and sniff her a------ while she jerks me off >when she is in the mood she loves to dominate me >makes me eat her p---- for 45+ minutes >sits on my face and suffocates me >covers my mouth and bites my neck while she rides me >calls me a "good boy" when I c-- I'm living the dream and I'm still not sure why she's with me.

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Anon goes to the local playground | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/22/19(Tue)01:21:19 No.49263389 File: 1515394355212.jpg (68 KB, 600x582) >>49253115 this is some good old 4chan cooked autism, truly and genuinely wholesome. Anonymous 01/21/19(Mon)21:54:56 No.4926103 File: Olivia Munn.jpg (79 KB, 591x720) Could the Khan Family Spell the End of Donald Trump? Are we in the beginning of the end of The Beginning of the End for National Journal Aud B Is This the End of I The Beginning of the End for Donald Trump Could this be the end of Donald Trump? It Has Dona Is This the End for Donald Trump The Atlantic carchive/2015/0umpe last 40 Beginning Of The End For Dor lowa is the beginning of the end for D Anonymous 01/21/19(Mon)21:49:28 No.49260983 >>49253115 this is almost as autistic as that duc who kicked a ball into a goalie's face and yelled, >"ARE YOU F------ SORRY?" at the top of his lungs. kek >>49260329 Congratulations! You have won all of my keks for today! Anonymous 01/21/19(Mon)11:28:42 No.49253115 ► >>49253153 >>49254294 >>49254338 >>49254480 >>49254933 >>49255880 >>49258425 >>49258537 >>49258644 >>49258688 >>49260329 >>49261031 >>49262574 >>49263276 >>49263389 >>49263688 >>49263857 >>49253024 >home gym >wanna try doing farmer walks but not enough space to move around >decide to go do it outside in the park nearby /fit/ - Fitness farmer walks in the park >load up my dumbbells with all the plates I can and go outside >literally do 360's around the playground carrying dumbbells and sweating like a pig >notice kids with their mom's staring at me from far away >realize they came to the playground but they don't wanna use it because I'm being wierd >become extremely self conscious and just go home >didn't even take a rest so I can't feel my forearms at that point >speed walk past them and blurt out "SORRY" >accidentally said it too loud and scared one of the mom's Anonymous 01/21/19(Mon)21:38:59 No.49260866 >>49260329 H--------. I haven't seen OC this good in a very long time, thanks for giving me hope about this place anon Anonymous 01/21/19(Mon)20:56:44 No.49260329 >>49260814 >>49260866 >>49260954 >>49260983 >>49260987 >>49260993 >>49262574 File: farmer walks in the park.jpg (216 KB, 1000x542) >>49253115 Had to be done. Anonymous 01/21/19(Mon)13:31:17 No.49254480 >>49253115 /fit/ is BY FAR the best board, and its OC is unparalleled Anonymous 01/21/19(Mon)13:20:12 No.49254338 File: 1537743791921.jpg (216 KB, 468x895) 12552 >>49253115 This is why /fit/ is the best board Anonymous 01/21/19(Mon)23:57:31 No.49262574 >>49262615 File: 1542914218407.jpg (114 KB, 384x503) >>49253115 >>49260329 Add me to the screencap Anonymous 01/21/19(Mon)21:50:32 No.49260993 >>49260329 God bess you

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Anon explains why it hates reddit | /r/Greentext

File: download.png (4 KB, 225x225) Anonymous 02/26/23(Sun)10:38:59 No.91776011 ► >>91776088 >>91776135 >>91776153 >>91776231 >>91776327 >>9177638 >>91776439 >>91776465 >>91776506 Why do you hate them so much? Anonymous 02/26/23(Sun)10:43:57 No.91776088 ► >>91776105 >>91776309 >>91776590 >>91776799 >>91776808 >> >>91776884 >>91776011 (OP) - Inorganic. They seeded their site with bot content to create interest in it - Corrupt. The rules are not enforced equally. - Woke. They were terrible long before even Twitter. - Goyslop. Can't talk about anything there unless it is advertiser friendly. Anonymous 02/26/23(Sun)10:44:26 No.91776105 ► >>91776088 >Goyslop calm down, rabbi Anonymous 02/26/23(Sun)10:45:57 No.91776135 ► >>91776011 (OP) Most of them are Americaaans. Anonymous 02/26/23(Sun)10:46:42 No.91776153 ► >>91776011 (OP) >circlejerk >SJWs >trannies >cucks >> Anonymous 02/26/23(Sun)10:50:37 No.91776231 >>91776289 >>91776462 >>91776718 >>91776011 (OP) It's changed a lot in the past ten years. It wasn't as woke back then and had a more libertarian bent. Anonymous 02/26/23(Sun)10:54:36 No.91776308 ► >>91776368 >>91776475 Reddit has a huge moderation problem. Somebody found out 5 powermods control 100 of the top 500 subs (and was subsequently banned from literally thousands of subs shortly after posting his research, how ironic). The problem with Reddit is that no socially well adjusted sane human being wants to moderate for free. You'll get banned left and right for the most retarded s--- & usually have to spend time formatting your post exactly the perfect way so it goes through and won't get taken down. On 4chan you just make a post and that's it, if it's s--- somebody calls you a n----- and sages the thread and it dies. Reddit's voting function would lead it to self-moderate itself pretty easily but subreddits get banned by Reddit for being "unmoderated" all the time. Not to mention it's a huge circlejerk. Reddit is very left-leaning as a whole and you will find that out very quickly, even the most non-political subreddits can turn into lefty echo chambers at times. To play devil's advocate it can at times be a great resource for information & discussion that can't really be had elsewhere. At it's core Reddit is just a bunch of interconnected forums. I'll only use it when I absolutely have to though and there's no other avenue. Usually the rule of thumb is the smaller & more niche-focused a sub is the less cucked & pozzed it is as well. >> Anonymous 02/26/23(Sun)11:01:06 No.91776437 ► Reddit uses a democratic vote system. One person = one vote. "Top rated" comments aren't based on quality, they're based on appealing to the masses. So you get a flood of low-tier puns, recycled jokes, memes, or parroting of popular narratives in the hopes of being a "top rated" comment. A good platform is more like a dictatorship. 1 or maybe 2 hardass moderators who ban users on the spot when they post this garbage. Communities need to be controlled or they turn to s---. >> Anonymous 02/26/23(Sun)10:58:36 No.91776386 ► >>91776011 (OP) i once got my comments downvoted and deleted explaining how to leech ad free content from priate sites for being immoral. never went there again after that.

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Greentext Stories - Anon goes to the gym. | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 02/27/23(Mon)15:49:45 No.72383773 >be me >decide to finally go to gym for first time >feeling pumped, ready to get ripped >get there and realize I have no idea what to do 642 KB PNG >try to lift weights, end up dropping them on my foot >ouch.jpg >guy next to me laughs and says "first time, huh?" >try to play it cool and say "yeah, just warming up" >decide to try the treadmill instead >set it to max speed, feel like a boss >realize I don't know how to stop it >start flailing my arms like a maniac >finally manage to hit the emergency stop button >everyone in the gym is staring at me now >try to play it cool again and say "just testing the safety features" >decide I've had enough for one day and leave >realize I parked in the wrong spot and now my car has a boot on it >great first day at the gym

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