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: Anonymous 04/03/23 (Mon)20:24:28 No.72818809 638 KB PNG I ran into an autistic kid while being a wagie also 'tism thread >be me, 21 years old >working a deadend job at a fast food >one day a autistic kid comes in and orders a 20-piece chicken nugget meal >as i'm handing him the bag, he looks at me dead in the eye and says "I hope you know how lucky you are to be working with chicken nuggies all day" >at first i'm confused but realize he is right >chicken nuggies are the ultimate food, the perfect combination of crispy breading and juicy meat >I start thinking about all the different dipping sauces and ways to eat chicken nuggies >BBQ, honey mustard, even ranch >from that moment on, I have a newfound appreciation for my job and the chicken nuggies >I'm serving Even start experimenting with my own chicken nuggie creations, like dipping them in milkshake or chocolate >Thank you random autistic kid

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File: aziz.jpg (84 KB, 720x540) No S COVEN TO YOUR DO Minutes Free!' teed Joe's Pepper ☐ Anonymous 01/05/25(Sun)21:04:00 No.207634914 >Why don't you get Abdul to deliver it? >>207635324 >>207635417 >"They found his passport lying on top of the wreckage. NOW GO!!!" ☐ Anonymous 01/05/25(Sun)21:33:05 No.207635312 >Look, kid, I got a newspaper to run and I need a picture of the splattered corpses at Ground Zero in seven minutes! >Fine, here. >Crap. Run it on page one with the headline "Spider-Man Leaves Trade Tower Victims to Die!" Give you two hundred bucks for the picture. >Three hundred for that and one from my private "LOL SUPERMAN" stash. >That's outrageous! Done. ☐ Anonymous 01/05/25(Sun)21:33:41 No.207635318 ► File: 1736073212833.jpg (230 KB, 1280×720) o Smoking IR DOOR >GOOOooooO00000000 Dr lepper le INCE 0000 ☐ Anonymous 01/05/25(Sun)21:41:18 No.207635417 File: americanmoviescene.png (449 KB, 720x540) Pepper Dr Pepper Pepper Pepper Dr Pepper Pepper Pepper Pepper Dr Pepper Pepper Dr Pepper Pepper Dr Pepper lepper Pepper Pepper Pepper Pepper Pepper Pepper Pepper Dr epper Pepper Pepper Pepper Pepper Pepper Dr Pepper >>207634914 (OP). >american movies

MIRROR NOW MIRRORNOW.IN CALIFORNIA FIRES WATCH: DEADLY FIRES GRIP HOLLYWOOD STARS' HOMES | Anonymous (ID: baWLIwd7 | 01/09/25(Thu)17:14:43 No.493843417 >be rich af >lose one of your multimillion dollar mansions in a fire >go on the news and cry about your loss from a 5 star hotel >everyone on redderp expresses their sorrow and sends condolences redshit logic: obscene wealth = good if you're a Dem

Anonymous ITT: Cooking buzzwords you hat(...) 1.4 MB WEBM 11/01/24(Fri)04:24:25 No.20946633 >comfort food All food is supposed to be comforting, there's no non-comfort food that's worth cooking. >soul food Its just basic American homemade dishes, but greasier and overcooked. >creamy Probably means it is tasteless without being buried in heavy whipping cream to mask the taste. >garlicky See above, just replace whipping cream with garlic. >fusion Oh wow, you added soy sauce to it, such fusion. Anonymous 11/01/24(Fri)04:39:15 No.20946637 >literal autistic retard triggered by everyday words and phrases thread no #43923948234 >>20946994 # >>20947280 #

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anon is "straight" | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 86 KB JPG 03/19/23(Sun)15:19:59 No.72628067 I'm straight but I would tongue man's foreskin before licking and massaging the glans delicately just to see his reaction

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Anon is harassing girls | /r/Greentext

Anonymous banned from the grocery store 04/04/23(Tue)00:12:52 No.72817024 89 KB PNG >go to pick up some groceries >at checkout line >foid cashier >nervous already, but figure i will just act calm >im the last one in line, there's no one else >notice up close how cute she is >egirl aesthetic with wednesday addams hair and really pretty >can feel my spaghetti being lost already >she checks of all my items, i pay >she asks me how long i have had my hair dyed (i have it blonde similar to xqc) >tell her 2 months >she nods and doesnt reply >suffer a tism attack and tell her "i can see you have the egirl look going on" >"yea" while giving me a bit of a weird look >"i think you look very sexy with it" >meant to say pretty, now i f----- up >she looks visibly uncomfortable >another employee comes up, tells me i cant speak that way to the employees and that im banned from the store >say nothing and get my groceries >speedwalk as fast as i can out of there I just came back and ive been crying for the past 20 minutes. why am i like this?

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Anon offers some interesting tips for everyday life. | /r/Greentext

File 1248135955.jpg-(77 KB, 1200x1200, Tips.jpg) TIPS Sig aka Jizzy 07/20/09(Mon)20:25:55 No.147652384 ITT: Tips for everyday life. I'll start; When you're given a cocktail napkin or coaster with an excessively wet drink (condensation), sprinkle salt on it. It will cease to lift up with your drink. Get hold of an army ration pack and keep it in your house / car. Especially useful in cold climates. If you need to leave your car in an area where you think it might get stolen, remove some small but vital part like the fuse for the fuel pump. Even though you may be nervous about talking to random people, the worst you can get is "Go away." Open a bank account, put a hundred dollars in it. Then put the atm card in a box somewhere. Having a hundred dollars that no one knows about could save your life. You can throw clothes in the dryer for about 5 minutes or so to get wrinkles out. Put smelly shoes in a plastic bag and put it in the freezer overnight. The smell is caused by bacteria, which will die when deep frozen. Use lighter fluid to remove sticky stuff from price labels etc. A couple of grains of rice a salt shaker will absorb moisture and keep the salt from turning into a miniature brick. Sharpen scissors by using them a few times on a piece of sand paper. If theres something you really need to remember the next day, put a weird object in a weird place. It helps you to remember anything by triggering your memory.

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Anon has a heavy bag | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1.35 MB GIF 04/03/23 (Mon)18:45:25 No.72814134 >Anon why is your book bag so heavy and since when have you started bringing a duffle bag to school? >mfw

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Anon cannot handle the breast style | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 896986484 205.3 kB JPG 1 REPLY 0 IMAGES 3 min ago How did this f----- get so rich and famous? >Not good looking >Not funny >Not exciting >Not the least bit entertaining He somehow got money from views from his trash videos early on and keeps his views by giving away money? What the f--- is wrong with the world Anonymous 896986525 REPLY min ago Seething cause he's rich and you're a fat incel basement dweller

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Anon is scared of Jewish people | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/03/23(Mon)15:39:41 No.72815506 a33.gif 756 KB GIF >Be me. >When I was a kid my Grandma would warn me about Jews. "Stay away from them anon, Jews like to snatch kids up and then cook them in a pot!" >My naive and impressionable mind ate up her stories. >Develop a genuine fear of Hasidic Jews. >Would cross the street to avoid one when I would walk to school. >Would sweat and panic when I was alone with one in an elevator once. >Eventually grow up and realise my grandma is just an delusional. Still get a jump in my stomach when I see a jew. Thanks grandma for the stress.

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Anon is a shitty friend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Am I in the wrong here? What d(...) ¿ 106 KB PNG 04/03/23 (Mon)21:18:12 No.72815312 >meet girl at friends house party >start flirting >she likes me >we text for a week or so >ask her on a date, she agrees >go to the zoo, date went well but no kiss or anything >text for a bit more >eventually we start talking about maybe taking it more seriously >agree to bring up our potential deal breakers >I ask if she's had sex before >she says yes >tell her it's not gonna work out >she's sad but understands >wants to stay friends >okay skip forward 2 months >she calls me on the phone >starts yelling at me for being a s----- friend and not texting or calling or meeting up with her for two months >she was just yelling and I couldn't get a single word in so I just hung up She's been texting and trying to call non-stop but I haven't responded yet, I don't really know what to say? I'm fine with having her as a friendly acquaintance, you know the kind that I see like 2-3 times a year and sometimes play vidya with but I already have 3 actual friends that eat my time up and I don't want more.

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Anon is tired | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/03/23 (Mon)12:34:21 No.72811549 >"life will be better when you finish highschool" >had to be mcdonald wagie before I can go to college >"life will be better when you finish college" >got $60k tuition debt from college >"life will be better when you have a job" >10hrs/day with $20/hrs (before tax), a quarter goes to rent >"life will be better when you have a wife" f--- it robots I ain't having any of this s--- anymore, how do I find a trad gay husband? 15 KB JPG

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Anon is a minecraft IT Consultant | /r/Greentext

Anonymous s----- clients 215 KB JPG 04/03/23(Mon)18:04:28 No.72813776 > be me > IT consultant, people call me in if their code is s--- and they need help > hired for a job for some retard and his minecraft server > dont play minecraft but at least i may get paid > guy lives somewhere in europe or something > deliberately cagey about what he wants, clearly doesn't speak english well > whatever, it's for the money > "so i need you to help me reprogram my entire server" > okay, i can do that i think > "oh, but i need it by 1 week from now" > huh.jpg > "also it's written in skript, this language written exclusively for minecraft" > whatthefuck.png > i ask the kid to give me his codebase so i can have some idea of what he wants because i'm not developing his server from a list of ideas he wants > "oh, sorry, i can't do that because you might steal my server" > kid provides a 2 page google doc outlining his expectations, included are the following: > "make server super cool", "pvp arena", "builders", "straff appications [sic]", "awesome pve features" this kid wants me to reprogram his entire minecraft server's codebase in a programming language i've never heard of, in one week, without access to the previous codebase, and when he gave me a list of things he wants from his server he gave me effectively no actual detail. i hope my pc catches fire

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Anon can't take it anymore | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: XtGEanJk AAAAA!! AAAAAA! AAAAAAA warm AAAAA 04/03/23 (Mon)10:34:21 No.422147926 >s--- happening every few years >s--- happening every year >s--- happening every month >s--- happening every week >s--- happening every few days >now s--- happening every few hours 73 KB JPG we're gonna die soon aren't we?

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Pewdiepie killed 4chan | /r/Greentext

Board /b/ - Random : Anonymous Settings Home 207 KB PNG 01/27/19(Sun)22:33:50 No.791116222 >be me >post on 4chan /b/ everyday >end up on youtube and see pewdiepie video titled "GREENTEXT" >watch video of pewdiepie reacting to our glorious posts >realize all his 9 year viewers probably decided to come on 4chan >mfw all they saw was p---

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Anon is at discord | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 70 KB JPG 04/02/23(Sun)21:18:26 No.72803777 >discord supposed to be be one of the most popular chat apps >people leaving long-running forums (and forums generally) to move at discord >now most discord server (even the big ones) are dead Where the hell are everyone at the internet!

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Greentext Stories - Anon’s new outlook | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous 04/03/23 (Mon)20:24:28 No.72818809 638 KB PNG I ran into an autistic kid while being a wagie also 'tism thread >be me, 21 years old >working a deadend job at a fast food >one day a autistic kid comes in and orders a 20-piece chicken nugget meal >as i'm handing him the bag, he looks at me dead in the eye and says "I hope you know how lucky you are to be working with chicken nuggies all day" >at first i'm confused but realize he is right >chicken nuggies are the ultimate food, the perfect combination of crispy breading and juicy meat >I start thinking about all the different dipping sauces and ways to eat chicken nuggies >BBQ, honey mustard, even ranch >from that moment on, I have a newfound appreciation for my job and the chicken nuggies >I'm serving Even start experimenting with my own chicken nuggie creations, like dipping them in milkshake or chocolate >Thank you random autistic kid

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