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>be white british >talking to americans on voice chat for years 126 KB JPG >subconsciously start doing some hybrid american/british accent >its started coming out in real life >start saying "dude" and pronouncing other words in my hybrid british/american accent >go to the doctor for something unrelated >in passing conversation he asks me how long i have been in the country >w-- >tell him i was born here and have been here my whole life >he says he thought i was canadian because of my accent the internet has ruined me

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: Anonymous 687 KB GIF tank top 03/16/23(Thu)08:28:49 No.72592213 >Be me, a fat dude >go buy a pack of doritos because i have my cravings >see skeleton looking people wearing winter clothing because its cold outside >i only wear a hoodie over a >remember i am genetically built to withstand cold >remember i could bodyslam them into the pavement >remember i could f--- their wife with my lil chubster >then make her buy me pizza >remember i could buck break a scrawny dude >one punch from my arm equals to ten of his >but then remember God made me to specifically play vidya and watch one piece >smile to myself and open the doritos EGAS >>72592213 (OP) # 03/16/23(Thu)08:49:04 No.72592313 is this a knee-jerk reaction to the thread about weight loss? Anonymous 03/16/23(Thu)09:10:56 No.72592425 >remember that you've always been the slowest, most unathletic, most out of shape person in every PE class. >realize that these imaginary physical altercations probably wouldn't go as well as you think. Nice obese cope.

Anonymous 12/28/24(Sat)11:32:03 No.103676189 29 KB JPG >company hired a new grad recently >a 21 year old white woman >it was the only junior spot available so i assume she must be great given how many applications we got (over 100) >asked to get to help get her started >she doesn't know what git is >she doesn't know what terminal is (says she only uses GUI) >she doesn't know how to extract a zip >she doesn't know how to access network storage >she doesn't know what RAM does (i asked as a joke) What the f--- is going on? Are the new grads cooked or did they just accidentally hire an idiot? I want to report it but I'm scared to as I am not that senior myself.

Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect What the F--- is going on Bongbros??? What the F--- is going on Bong(...) Settings Mobile Home 12/28/24(Sat) 13:28:53 No.492579333 20241228_122812.jpg 614 KB JPG 3 days it's been like this. What are the k---- doing to our air? Anonymous (ID: fTOa7Lbe) >>492579333 (OP) # 12/28/24(Sat) 13:29:41 No.492579374 wow, fog in winter?? it's over >>492579602 #

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Anon provides comfort to a grieving family | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/15/20(Sun)10:06:11 No.60926043 File: EA90511F-7021-46AD-B37F-A(..).png (170 KB, 349x300) EVEN ON THE COLDEST NIGHTS I.EAT MY OWN C-- >>60925869 F--- it might as well tell you all >work at funeral agency >have to meet up with the family to plan out the funeral >policy at work is to keep an understanding tone and not smile too much >suddenly get overcome by the knowledge of pic related. >my friend showed me this image a week ago and ever since then it has been appearing in my mind >I try my best not to smile >make it through the entire meeting without smiling while the image haunts me >at the end of the meeting youre supposed to say something inspirational and uplifting to the family >I want to say "even on the coldest nights, the warmth of our loved ones will let us see the dawn once more >"even on the coldest nights, i eat my own c--"

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Anon tells it how it really is. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/18/20(Mon)15:59:11 No.508602648 38 KB JPG If trans women demand representation, it means women don't represent them. They don't even see themselves as women >>508603564 # >>508603848 # >>508603980 # >>508604082 # >>508604123 # >>508604141 # >>508604148 # >>508604187 # >>508604240 # >>508604265 # >>508604443 # >>508604450 # >>508604532 # >>508604637 # >>508604702 # >>508604805 # >>508604814 # >>508604820 # >>508604843 # >>508604875 # >>508604935 # >>508604981 # >>508604994 # >>508605167 # >>508605317 # >>508605414 # >>508605416 # >>508605429 # >>508605542 # >>508605645 # >>508605653 # >>508605683 # >>508605704 # >>508605767 # >>508605906 # >>508605923 # >>508605949 # >>508606020 # >>508606116 # >>508606203 # >>508606223 # >>508606232 # >>508606353 # >>508606475 # >>508606545 # >>508606558 # >>508606614 # >>508606650 # >>508606668 # >>508606771 # >>508606796 # >>508606891 # >>508606928 #

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Korean incel loses it completely (I hope this is bait bc holy fuck) | /r/Greentext

Anonymous KOREA RULES 04/20/23(Thu)16:04:34 No.73026198 >be Korean >sit in subway >lock eyes with a white single mom with her baby >can see the lust in her eyes >she looks at her baby in disgust >I can see she wishes she gave birth to a half-Korean baby instead of the subhuman she has right 418 KB JPG now >we look at each other again >she whispers quietly "kill my baby and breed me" Why are white women like this? They hate their children and want to replace them with half-Korean kids. I noticed these same thing Latina and Black women too. Why are we so superior bros?

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Anon experiences problems finding a decent femanon. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Marie t'es dans la merde la 1 Marie Marie Marie.... 611 KB PNG 04/20/23(Thu)06:25:26 No.73024973 Being a blackbot ruins your dating prospects. Contrary to popular belief, your options are limited to: >single mom black chicks (mostly ugly) >cute but crazy young white girls who want you to behave like an abusive thug towards them >older white milfs who cant have kids anymore >weird cuckold couples >overly spicy and sassy Latinas

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Anon summarizes the KANG situation | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/19/23(Wed)19:12:48 No.183234885 ► >>183234984>>183235181 >>183235229 >>183235895 >>183236866 >>183247912 >>183253267 >>183254081 File: 65367576f6.png (329 KB, 736x960) So if I'm getting this right >new black actor starts appearing in Hollywood movies >celebrated across the media as a new star who will provide some much-needed diversity >stars in superhero movies as a villain named Kang >there's a scene of him dressed as a Pharaoh >suddenly it's revealed he is a violent criminal who beats the s--- out of women and ritually abused people in college >has to be cancelled right after beginning his career This is like a story that someone would write to make black people look bad but it's actually real

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anon reminisces | /r/Greentext

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Anon describes life in India | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: kj0/QnWP When you find the designated s------- street runny.co 21 KB JPG 05/26/17 (Fri)03:38:45 No.127169489 >be indian >wake up to screams of women being gang r---- >pray to blue two headed rhino god >no shower so bathe in the s--- filled river >almost choke on child's spinal column >ride on roof of victorian train to the call /scam center >"Hello this is pajeeet from scamsoft we need to protect your com-*click* >creepily hit on white women on facebook during breaktime >walking home >need to take a s--- for the 35th time that day >squat over a dying orphan who happened to be in the way >wipe anus with hand >eat rice grown from s--- water from a giant communal bowl >use hands like a chimp >time for bed >crawl up in a pile of straw, pray to 5 armed lobster- woman god for allowing me to live in the greatest country on earth BUMP (ID: RzY+2Qpd >>127169489 (OP) # That's why smart people like me leave this s------- behind, here I come USA. 05/26/17 (Fri)03:41:00 No.127169633

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“because of anime” | /r/Greentext

E Anonymous Anime Vacations 142 KB JPG 04/08/23(Sat)16:41:03 No.251077570 >went to Venice because of anime >it was nothing like the anime >everything smelled Why didn't you warn me? More ideas for anime vacations. : Anonymous >went to Mars because of Aria >the atmosphere was terrible and nothing like the anime >I suffocated >>251085691 # >>251088037 # 04/08/23(Sat)16:42:13 No.251077611

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Anon watches John Wick | /r/Greentext

File: yeah.jpg (29 KB, 1280x720) Anonymous 03/26/23(Sun)00:16:19 No.182209293 >>182209331 >be me >seeing John Wick 4 in theater >quick shot of of a dog peeing on a bad guy after he's dead >some guy a few rows behind me screams I LIKE PISS Am I retarded or is he? Anonymous 03/26/23(Sun)00:17:19 No. 182209331 ► >>182209293 (OP) You are, unless you went back and p----- om him right there

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Anon visits the eating area. | /r/Greentext

>live in dorm with 8 people to a kitchen >come out to kitchen, spaghetti everywhere, on floor, counters, walls, in sink and on stove >guy comes out "sorry about that, you know how it is with spaghetti" no i don't

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Anon looks like light yagami | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Highschool me 59 KB JPG :( 04/20/23(Thu)06:21:44 No.897906508 2 Replies / 1 Image >Be me in Highschool >Look exactly like Light Yagami from death note >People keep coming up to ask if i'm light yagami or telling me I look like him tells me i look light light yagami >friend looks at me sus when i take out black notebook >teacher watched death note and View Thread Anonymous He's baiting guys don't tell anon your names 04/20/23(Thu)06:24:06 No.897906552

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Anon commits multiple crimes | /r/Greentext

>Dress up as plague doctor. >Walk down street to McDonalds. >Enter, walk to counter. >Hot blond girl turns around and screams. >Put on deep voice. >"DO NOT BE AFRAID, CHILD!" >Wave arms, leap onto counter. >Kickover register and charity jar. >Raise hands into air. >"PURRRRIFFFFYYYYYYYYY!" >Manager storms in, appears angry. >Moonwalk. >Kick fat kid's McFlurry from hands. >"You are fat. You need not this." >Tip hat to manager, jump from counter. >Head for door, see bitch/hot girl from high school. >She has fries, is staring with gaping jaw. >Sprint to her. >Grab her fries, slap her. >Manager shouts, tries to grab hat. >Spin around, slap him across face. >"UNHAND ME, MALE OF BROWN SKIN!" >Sparta kick the door. >Run out of store. >Walk the dinosaur. >Go home, leave without costume. >Return to McDonald's, see sign with "no dogs allowed" stuff. >See picture of plague doctor with cross-out thing on it. >LOL.

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Greentext Stories - The Internet wrecks Anon | /r/Greentext

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>be white british >talking to americans on voice chat for years 126 KB JPG >subconsciously start doing some hybrid american/british accent >its started coming out in real life >start saying "dude" and pronouncing other words in my hybrid british/american accent >go to the doctor for something unrelated >in passing conversation he asks me how long i have been in the country >w-- >tell him i was born here and have been here my whole life >he says he thought i was canadian because of my accent the internet has ruined me

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