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Anonymous 11/24/23(Fri)14:38:53 No.75528458 >Start working at Target >Some decent looking girls >They're either married, in a relationship, or have kids. It's like I'm just God's Buffon at this point. I mean...I'm 31 so you gotta be realistic, not many girls are going to reach their mid to late 20's and still be single without kids. I also don't know how to find out IF someone of them are single or not because that seems creepy, probably shouldn't flirt with girls you work with, but it's hard to know which ones are single and which ones aren't. I just have a strong feeling most of them are in relationships. 88 KB JPG

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

>she stops me, wants to roleplay >blindfolds me, we're playing doctor >kinky but okay >feel pressure around my ass >pull off blindfold 00 Anonymous (ID: zuq0 ITT: Weird sex experiences >be 22 >start dating blonde. 7/10 >shes quirky but fun > dat ass >second date >go to her place >shewantstheD.jpeg >go down on her >things are going well >crazy bitch is shoving 3-4 plastic horses into my a------ >she says my condition is "stable"

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Anon has a bad dream | /r/Greentext

[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [Auto] File: download.png (7 KB, 139x139) Anonymous 11/24/23 (Fri) 17:15:49 No.909839725 pic unrelated >be me >having a wild dream >banging chicks left and right >all of them are 8-9/10 from school >feelsgoodman THEREISNOHOPE >walk towards bathroom for some action with any girl i can find >feeli like a boss >hear a bloodcurdling scream as I approach girl's bathroom >ohshit.wav >wait for 5 seconds, scared shitless >I ask "Who's in there?" >mfw i didn't even ask if they were ok >hear another scream, worse than the last >instinctively know that she is scared of me r----- her like i did the otehrs >wake up in a cold sweat and a crusty wet dream stain Why am i like this? Is this retribution for the times I had fantasized about f----- up s---? I swear I'm going crazy Anonymous 11/24/23 (Fri)17:16:30 No.909839753 Imao pic related [Return] [Catalog] [Top] [Update] [Auto]

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Factions and Fallacies | /r/Greentext

11/24/23(Fri)10:14:57 No.909818595 >Left $7Billion worth of military equipment for the Taliban to take JOE BIDEN OR THE PEOPLE in Afghanistan WHO IS DUMBER... WHO VOTED FOR HIM??? Anonymous >Sent $75Billion worth of military aid to the Ukranian-Russian war (which the Obama admin started back in 2014) >Send $6Billion to Iran which they just sent to Hamas and caused the Hamas-Israeli war now >"lol sorry we just dont have the money for student loan relief!" 42 KB JPG Why do Democrats vote against their own interest?

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Misato Katsuragi now recruits for the Army. | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous (ID: q6MeKGz1) Captura de tela 2023-11-1(...).png MY 11/19/23(Sun)13:29:44 No.449275428 >>449275881 (792 KB, 594x789) google yandex iqdb wait ARMY RESERVE IT'S YOUR TIME. DANG SONG D >>449274563 (OP) >pic related, yesterday snapshot of an army enlistment booth at an american anime con >fat and bored apathetic zogbots hire a fat model to cosplay as popular anime character and sex symbol Katsuragi Misato from Netflix's anime Neon Genesis Evangelion Very related, here is an excerpt from historian Tom Holland on the roman recruitment crisis: >"Even as (the Late Roman Empire's) urban population remained much the same since Constantinus's victory at the Milvian Bridge, recruitment among roman citizens by the year 390 a.d had plummeted to barely 15% of what it was was 50 years prior - what is made more dire when one realizes that the Roman Empire after Diocletianus's reforms required a standing army at least twice the size of that of the time of the roman golden age under Vespasianus." >"The attempt to replace roman soldiers for the Foederati (immigrants mostly settled ilegally on roman land) led to a swift competence crisis among the ranks, as well as the disappearance of roman veteran culture. Among the most shocking anecdotes are reports of roman armies mutinying over 'the absurdity that roman soldiers had to build roads and infrastructure"." >"As political, demographical and economic factors coalesced, the roman recruitment crisis can be understood as an existential crisis of the empire itself. Simply put, roman citizens rich and poor no longer believed that a military career would be benefitial to them, nor they believed the existence of the military and the empire itself were worth any sacrifice." It is over.

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The Eye of Discomfort | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: cofeS+At)! 267 KB PNG 11/24/23(Fri)09:34:50 No.19123275 >try to read some hentai doujinshi >find one with interesting premise >it's ruined by s----- writing, over the top drawing, and cringey sex this is why I can't get into japshit. everything is so cringe and over the top

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Another Hollywood blockbuster | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: xsEqNPJg) DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm 4 Ridley Scott on historians having criticisms about 'NAPOLEON'. "When I have issues with historians, I ask: 'Excuse me, mate, were you there? No? Well, shut the f--- up then." (Source: thetimes.co.uk/article/ridley...) 11/24/23(Fri)04:50:00 No.449778785 ridley brainrott.jpg 256 KB JPG >WERE YOU THERE?! SHUT THE F--- UP Anonymous (ID: ONzmWfyf) talentless hack >>449779023 # >>449779170 # >>449779205 # >>449782070 # >>449784017 # >>449786854 # >>449788788 # >>449790701 # >>449794519 # >>449796667 # >>449803842 # >>449810845 # Anonymous (ID: tvJJIOGd) Yeah, sure. 11/24/23(Fri)04:51:25 No.449778867 >>449778785 (OP) # >No less than 14 black French officials/officers in 19th Century France according to this movie. : Anonymous (ID: (kzCqlh6Q) 11/24/23(Fri)04:51:50 No.449778892 >>449781328 # >>449782687 # >>449788904 # >>449807433 # >>449810845 # >>449810845 # 11/24/23(Fri)04:52:26 No.449778936 Extremely disrespectful and unintelligent response. Don't work on historical films if you don't care about history. >>449779115 # >>449786522 # >>449795394 # >>449798377 #

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Anon looks back on the ProZD controversy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous SungWon Cho 11/24/23(Fri)13:38:26 No.658509514 >Why yes, a voice actor needs to have the same skin color as the character they are voicing. A white person voicing a black character is not only problematic, its also robbing poor black people of their chances 396 KB JPG >Very well. We agree with your visionary idea. And implementation will start now. To make an example, we have removed you from any role you had as a non asian character. You will only be allowed to voice explicitly korean characters from now on. Thank you for making the world a better place >Wait not like that!!!! What did he mean by this?

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I thought he was forced to make it. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/24/23(Fri)08:37:11 No.192435351 515 KB PNG >Oh no I'm worried the military might use the atomic bomb I'm making for them as a weapon.

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Anon likes shenmue | /r/Greentext

Dreamcast. worst stories thread? I'll start >Be me at like 22 >Party with some of my college wiggas Shermers Hear some dude talking about shenmue, join in on conversation Valh >He says "you're a fan of shenmue?!" >I'm wearing a shenmue shirt under my hoodie so I meant to pull up my hoodie but for some reason I have a brainfart and pull my c--- out 114 KB JPG >He just stares at me for a second and laughs hysterically >I try to play it off and actually show him the shirt >He says cool shirt and cool d--- too I guess I hate myself

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We just need more money | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/24/23(Fri)16:11:48 No.658473757 strauss.jpg 101 KB JPG >be loyal to gang >pull your own weigh making the gang money >never broke gangs rules nor betray the gang >get kicked out by one man's emotional decision without real reason >no one tried to defend you >get caught by police >STILL dont betray the gang even when they torture you he didn't deserve it. the gang mistreated him so bad and yet he still stayed loyal.

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Liminal spaces | /r/Greentext

pool.png, 924KiB, 954x530 Anonymous Sat 18 Nov 2023 13:29:26 No.36470406 Quoted By: >>36470851 >>36471123 >>36450203 The thing is that with all that monster and "levels" and whatever s--- they take all the edge of it. They should just let themselves immersed in the sheer presence of an unnatural space. But let me whip a greentext up to illustrate what I'm talking about. >You opened a door near a hotel's poolroom during a trip. >The door however doesn't lead back. >You are in an endless complex of pools. >Mosaic tiles, lukewarm water, plastic plants, soft breeze and cold sunlight seeping from the small slits functioning as windows are all around you. >You feel you should panic, but strangely you don't. >Calm, ethereal electronic music is coming from somewhere, making you feel strangely nostalgic. >You feel like a child again as you walk through the narrow pool-corridors, rest in pillared hallways and sit at small, plastic tables besides the pools. >The rippling of the crystal clear water is almost mesmerizing, and you cannot help but feel extremely at ease. >Maybe you are not lost. >You don't feel hunger or thirst, also you have no idea how much time have passed since you are here. >Maybe this is where you should have been all along. >You feel happy. Excited. Warm. >The water beckons. You quickly go into the closest pool, and lie on your back, letting the water support you. >This is good. >You feel good. Even as you start sinking. >The feeling is familiar. You felt like this a long time ago. Maybe in your mother's womb, not that you remember anymore. >Your body does however. Or maybe your innermost self. Your soul. >The pool complex might be a temple to Remembrance itself, and the water is the amniotic fluid of time. >You finally have time to be with yourself. To be within yourself. >But maybe you don't even need it. A self. After all, this place is good. >Why would you need anything else, but safety? >You give way to the sensation. >The border of your ego slowly dissolves as you drift away, smiling, grinning even. >But this is good. >You are safe. >You are home. ||

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Anon is a terrorist | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)17:55:24 UTC+8 No.541106815 Replies: >>541106937 >>541108120 >>541108190 I have a revenge story. First a little back story of how I got the Idea for it. >Come home a little drunk from a friends house. >1 a.m, silence, only thing that emits light is my PC screen. >browsing piratebay looking for movies to torrent >suddenly I hear a eardrum piercing explosion from my closet. >heartattack.jpeg >since nobody is in my apartment, I decide to investigate >lights on, approach closet >a rancid smell coming from my closet >open closet >yellow liquid literally on everything, a 1.5 liter bottle of apple juice exploded into 3 pieces >what the f--- >quickly google it >apple juice fermented, gas expanded, big boom. >interesting had to throw away a few white shirts since the apple juice wouldn't come off. anyway, to the revenge story Replies: >>541106937>>541108120>>541108190 Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)18:16:48 UTC+8 No.541108190 Replies: >>541108678 >>541108831 >>541110147 >>541106815 con't >so there is this bitch I used to date >claimed she was pregnant >didn't tell her I'm sterile since I have a defect in some protein that makes sperm tails or something. >(not sure how I feel about never having kids to this day) >dumped her, had illegal abortion, and now looks better then she was opposed to what I expected. >invited to party in 3 days >ex's house >next day walk to fridge, take out bottle of apple juice. >*insert lit light bulb above head* >buy a six-pack of little apple juice bottles. >drink half of each bottle >seal tightly >put outside in the sun for a day to speed up fermentation process on the day of the party >bring a six pack of beer, smuggle the six pack of half empty apple juice bottles. >meet ex, have "frenemie" small talk >hide bag with apple juice in upstairs bathroom >walk around house thinking where to put bottles >eventually decide >1 in her panties drawer (she never reaches for the underwear in the back) >1 in the toilet deck (wasn't sure it was going to work) >1 drop behind fridge >1 behind washing machine >1 under her bed >and the last one... and this is the best f------ part, in her current bf's gamer PC (f--- him and his red LED case lights) >almost got caught dropping the bottle behind the fridge and opening the PC case, s--- was spooky cont' Replies: >> 541106815>>541108678>>541108831>>541110147 Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)18:26:26 UTC+8 No.541108831 Replies: >>541109471 >>541108190 cont' >having fun at party, going home >everyday wake up like a kid on Christmas morning expecting to hear about some kind of applosion >two days pass >on the third day >hear from a friend that an apple juice bottle left behind the fridge at ex's house exploded >fridge ruined, have to replace it or fix components >they weren't in the house at the time, found out when they came home >heard her bf raged at her. >applejuicesagapartl.avi Replies: 541108190>>541109471 Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)18:55:59 UTC+8 No.541110970 Replies: >>541111112>>541111441 >>541111596 >>541111621 >>541109471 >second was the washing machine bottle >rumors start to spread about the applejuice creeper >heard they were asleep at the time of the explosion >ex freaked out, bf raged from confusion >managed to save the washing machine, but cleaning the bathroom was a bitch >third was his PC. >the same day after the washing machine bottle >mutual friend told me he was playing LoL for a few hours while the bottle exploded >wore headphones so he didn't realize at first what happened until his computer crashed >apple juice fried cpu >apple juice fried gpu >apple juice kills shatters case fan >PC is kill >bf went on a rampage, smashed ex's laptop, slapped her and left. >they broke up on the next day. 3 left eplies: >> 541109471>>541111112>>541111441>>541111596>>541111621 □ Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)19:03:55 UTC+8 No.541111596 Replies: >>541112270 >>541112430 >>541110970 *plating LoL for a few hours prior to the bottle explosion >ex is devastated, can see all of her emo posts on fb >a few days later >heard that cops came to ex's house >everybody knows about Commander applejew >told them all about the apple juice bottles >showed them her underwear drawer and the exploded bottle >her best friend tells everyone she passed out and p----- herself when she opened the drawer and the bottle exploded >federal investigation ensues >imgoingtojail.exe >panic, wait for cops to show up any day now con't to Apple Juice saga part IV Replies: >> 541110970>>541112270>>541112430 □ Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)19:16:16 UTC+8 No.541112430 Replies: >>541112980 >>541113019 >>541113587 >>541111596 >since it's her parents house she rarely goes to the second floor (grandparents died, left her the house) >bf left her, "needs a change" >she decided to clean upstairs >apparently decided to take a s--- there for convenience >nobody shat there since the party about a week ago >pushes button >bottle explodes >plastic top flies right off >ex gets sprayed with toilet water and fermented apple juice >(you'll be surprised how massive of an explosion a little plastic bottle produce with the right pressure) >goes straight to her friends house, didn't even change >she's hysterical at this point >refuses to get back to the house >moved to a regular apartment withing two weeks from the incident >mutual male friends help her move >mutual friend invited me to help >have nothing to do, so okay. >not suspicious because mutual friends and he invited me cont to last part of the saga Replies: >> 541111596>>541112980>>541113019 Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)07:31:29 No.541113587 File: 1396870289863.jpg-(10 KB, 281x179, juicedefuser.jpg) >>541112430 she was relatively a "fresh ex" at the time, we've been together for a year or so so still have mutual friends, still see her at parties, helped her on random occasions once or twice>yes it is kind of weird, but doesn't bother me much. >so we help her pack her stuff into boxes >she gave us general instructions, but still refused to get into the house >traumatized and what not >I do a good job, not slacking around but I have one goal in mind >"Applejew commander must strike one last time" >look under bed, bottle still there. >"if I just put it into a random box she'll know it was someone who is in the house right now" >decide to put it into something less suspicious and be like "oh I just put it right in the box, didn't even open it" if I'll be questioned >carefully take out apple juice bottle under the bed >bottle seems bloated a little pic related >put bottle into a fairly large vase she has with fake flowers. >carefully place vase into box. >mark box >personally get it to the van, secure it as best as I can. FFW 3 hours >we help her unpack, it is about 7 p.m >place vase on kitchen table when no one is looking >flowers in >IED Is set. Replies: >>541113905>>541114085 Anonymous (ID: kfd/dKIX) 04/07/14(Mon)07:41:30 No.541114346 >>541113587 >we leave, almost finished unpacking >said she'll finish by herself >wake up with a phonecall >ex is in hospital >"Oh s--- what happend?" with genuine concern >apparently she was eating and wanted to throw the vase since it was her grandmothers and it was ugly >picked up vase >vase exploded into a million pieces >large shard flew near her and cut her face under the chin >tiny shards cut her face and arms >she needed 4 stitches on her face >her face looks like she survived a 6 barrel gatling-gun attack from point blank range >I'm scared shitless >she didn't want to involve the police again >she took therapy for 6 month >stayed in apartment, but made her friend stay with her for a month. >friend told me she checks the toilet deck before taking a s--- or pissing, even in public places. >looks terrified each time she opens a drawer. >feel kind of bad for it now >haven't talked to her for two years now, moved to a different state Replies: >>541114462

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Debut of Desires | /r/Greentext

And Cockblocked by the Irish Nation by the Irish Natio(...) Cockblocked 246 KB JPG 11/23/23(Thu)20:49:05 No.909793915 >Be me >College student trying to lose virginity >Unfortunately black, so at disadvantage >Decide I could play the exotic card and try to get laid abroad >For some reason choose ireland >luckyshamrock.gif >Go to pubs and start getting wasted after working on assignments for some months >No girls are interested, even the one I kissed >Today some nut decides to shank some kids >Rioters raging in the street >Hear about mobs prepping to catch anyone a shade off of white tomorrow morning >Basically can't risk going outside at night or outside at all after this >Confined home the moment I try to go out >I swear sometimes it feels like some is out to get me >My minds playin tricks on me >Assignment deadlines get closer >Accept that I will leave this country as a virgin This is just cursed, and I really put in the work, cleaned up everything, groomed up, got my game together, and tried to think positive. I know damn well once I graduate I will be cockblocked by my work env't, so it really was now or never, in other words, never. >inb4 serves you n------ right I just wanted to lose my virginity. My family would never allow me to marry anyone not from my ethnicity.

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Greentext Stories - The Romance Illusion | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous 11/24/23(Fri)14:38:53 No.75528458 >Start working at Target >Some decent looking girls >They're either married, in a relationship, or have kids. It's like I'm just God's Buffon at this point. I mean...I'm 31 so you gotta be realistic, not many girls are going to reach their mid to late 20's and still be single without kids. I also don't know how to find out IF someone of them are single or not because that seems creepy, probably shouldn't flirt with girls you work with, but it's hard to know which ones are single and which ones aren't. I just have a strong feeling most of them are in relationships. 88 KB JPG

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