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Anonymous Hiking 111 KB JPG waterfalls 11/28/23(Tue)02:55:12 No.75573597 >Try taking my family to a fun, calming nature hike in the American wilderness >Pick out an easy, flat footpath >Trail is made of a wooden bridge over a beautiful marshland in fall. Super easy, lots of sights including mountain views and >.... >Family gets THREE HUNDRED METERS in and turns around. >Mother: What are we even doing this for? Are we going into town on the other side? It's a loop >Sisters: Eww we got mud all over our sneakers!!! It's less than 50m of mud trail before the boardwalk (One of them is nearly f------ 30 btw) Why do I even try? Honestly I was hoping to find one person I can go on hikes with but I guess it wasn't their jam.

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Shades of Femininity | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Women OnlyFans Also Women 873 KB PNG 11/28/23(Tue)06:55:00 No.75574704 The duality of women is amazing. >Fan attention with sexy pictures on instagram >Sell naked picture of their bodies >Sign up on dating apps to promote OnlyFans account >Engage in prostitution. Meanwhile >P--- bad >I don't need no man >I am not an object, blah blah blah Its amazing they flip flop between objectifying themselves for a quick buck on moment, and in the next they want to be treated as if they are strong, independent, and don't need no man.

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Anon tried to compliment a woman | /r/Greentext

IMG_1148.jpg (259 KB, 693x610) >be me >have pointless IT job doing something I dont understand with firewalls >crazy crush on hot 7.5/10 roastie colleague >she sends me message on teams to have coffee >coffee goes well, so we have dinner >dinner goes well, we go to her apartment >literally the most amazing night of my life >in morning she says how much she enjoyed it >I say "you were phenomenal, you could charge hundreds of dollars and I would definitely pay haha" >"what do you mean anon, do you pay for sex?" >"ermm no, just trying to say how good you were" >"good like a prostitute anon? Why would you f------ say that?" >"well i was just trying to say how much I enjoyed..." >"f--- you, you compared me to a w----" >walk home angry at myself for f------ this up >today at work get message from roastie >"got 200 bucks to spend?" Im confused by this. Could she be an actual prostitute?

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anon defeats le thermometer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 85 KB PNG ?? >ohshit.png >no beating the inescapable thermometer of death. >it f------ works >it thinks i have a fever >win : Anonymous >>910026983 (OP) # : Anonymous 11/28/23(Tue)18:06:11 No.910026983 >be me >school, cringe 7 KB PNG >be recovering from sickness >dont want to go to school >:trollface: have idea >pretend sicker than actually am, flawless plan >mom pulls out thermometer 11/28/23(Tue)18:11:56 No.910027133 11/28/23(Tue)18:16:06 No.910027217 OK I only have one word for you, OP: Le Epic xD. 11/28/23(Tue)18:25:27 No.910027397 : Anonymous >>910026983 (OP) # go away you underageb& little turd

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Cockblocked by some fetus's | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Tue 31 Jan 2023 19:27:18 No.33978337 >>33976247 i got a "friend of a friend" kind of story from middle school. I'll just greentext it probably bs looking back but what isnt on this board kek >be anon's friend, 16 and a "punk" >other friend is gonna be throwing a small party on halloween >pranks and s---, we have halloween off so its gonna last long into the night >head to the address of the party >old suburban house, no one knew it was ever inhabited >lights are on, marliyn manson or some s--- is blasting through the walls >head inside, start shooting the s---, end up taking a shot of some chocolate vodka or some s--- >chatting with some qt 3.14 goth chick >almost get to making out with her >some dude screams from the upstairs of the house >everyone heads up to see the f--- is going on >some drunk dude broke into the attic and found this decently sized metal box or some s--- that had this 50s floral looking pattern on it that was starting to chip off >drunk opened it >told his friend hes gotta see this >it's entirely full of fetuses. dead fetuses most incredibly decayed except for one. >everyone GTFOs >tfw cockblocked by a box of dead babies

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Anon has an existential crisis at 3am | /r/Greentext

File: images (70).jpg (19 KB, 498x498) Anonymous (ID: 6UYmlouv >Be me, an aspiring programmer. >Spends countless nights learning Python, JavaScript, you name it. >Hears news about Al getting smarter by the day. >Starts panicking. 11/28/23(Tue)09:29:53 No.450189182 [Reply] >Will my newly acquired coding skills be obsolete? >Lie in bed, staring at the ceiling, wondering if I should have studied something else. >Think about Al taking over every job imaginable. >Question the meaning of everything. >Feel existential crisis creeping in. >Post on 4chan at 3 am asking if learning programming is a waste of time now. Is Learning Programming Even Worth It Anymore? +189 replies and 17 images omitted. Click here to view. >>450208207

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Intrigues of Obsession | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: 4rbgRNKF) 20 KB PNG 11/27/23(Mon)15:49:59 No.19144148 >be me >get obsessed over random thing >feel urge to spend as much money as quick as possible on said thing >after buying stuff interest fades away and im left with stuff i dont even care about and a s--- ton of debt. Is this Autism? I played Postal 2 last week and i couldn't sleep until i bought (not even played) every dlc and one of those running scissors sings for 25 bucks. This keeps happening and its ruining my life. I got obsessed over Airsoft one year ago and now i have a $1200 Airsoft gun lying around i only use to shoot bugs. First instance that i can remember is when i got obsessed over fortnite right after its launch and i spend $3000 dollars on Skins and about $500 on skins. I was 14.

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I'm sorry what did I just read? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Mon 19 Jun 2023 06:30:49 No.35070441 >be me a few years ago >just turned 21 >go to lame party >meet 8/10 qt 3.14 >both decide party is lame >leave together >tells me shes dtf >walk to nearby park >its late, no kids >hop on swing >she hops on me >4leggedspider.jpg >get to grinding >grab her t--- >she wants to get naked >hop off swing >get on bench >she takes off shirt and bra >arms and head fold back behind her >ribcage opens up >no internal organs >just teeth >lots and lots of teeth >creature rears back ready to devour me in one bite >grab my right thumb with my left hand >jerk it counterclockwise >right hand pops out and folds down >plasma cannon in right arm primes >extend right arm as ribcage jaws wrap around me >squeeze right fist with a millisecond to spare >feels weird when detached >muffled thump as plasma blast escapes >hole in her back the size of a trashcan lid >her corpse falls >plasma cannon primes again >likely playing dead >aim for neural core in pelvis >pow >scan for life signs with retinal implant >left eye burns but im used to it >shegone.mp4 >register kill with mom >switch to long range >scan for randos and lookyloos >nobody saw a thing >power down plasma cannon >reattach hand >wriggle fingers around to ensure proper alignment >bend right pinky back to pop it open >OW >retrieve immolation pellet from socket >close finger back up >ow again >wriggle fingers again >all is hunky dory >drop immolation pellet on corpse >walk away as it burns >head home to mom to restock and recharge >another one off the streets

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tfw no tall gf | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous N 11/28/23(Tue)12:59:49 No.192576290 TALL GIRL tallgirl.jpg 97 KB JPG >Tall, blonde, beautiful face, nice soft voice, white straight teeth, clear skin, perfect hair and...oh my God...she's, she's...A TALL F------ MONSTER, H--------?! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS FREAK? HOW DID GOD LET SOMETHING SO LONG SLITHER OUT OF A PERSUMABLY NORMAL-SIZED MOTHER'S LEGS INTO THE COLD GAZE OF A WORLD ITS TALL, VERTICALLY GIFTED, MUTANT ASS WOULD AND COULD NEVER BELONG TO? BEGONE FROM MY SIGHT, FOUL LANKY! YOUR GHASTLY HEIGHTS CONFOUND MY TEMPERS, WENCH! Now that the dust has settled...what the F--- was her problem?

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Anon on trusting the science | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: c1Y030V9 = Q HEALTH SEPTEMBER 14. 2022 "Our risk-benefit analysis showed that benefits exceeded procedural risks... by up to 200 to 1." 11/27/23(Mon)14:23:46 No.450147390 Defying science, American parents are turning away from male circumcision Ross Pomeroy in BIG THINK My wife and I are currently expecting our first child in late October, a boy, and we recently started discussing whether or not to circumcise. For those unaware, circumcision is the surgical removal of the foreskin covering the tip of the penis. I entered the discussion in favor, but with no strong feelings either way. However, after researching the scientific literature and expert opinion, I came out firmly for the procedure, and frankly somewhat frustrated at the recent trend against it. It's not hip to nip the tip F_yByXDWMAAadKg.jpg 105 KB JPG SUBSCRIBE Credit: Stig as/Adobe Stock >Not hacking up baby d--- is defying science A lot to unpack here...

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They unironically eat bugs | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Cyberpunk 2077 11/28/23(Tue)06:06:18 No.658830352 214321523463467.png 3.44 MB PNG >be cdpr >make third of the map a f------ greenhouse >still not enough food to feed the entire night city What do they eat?

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The One BBC ring | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/28/23(Tue)04:07:45 No.192560634 ပါဝင်ရေးများအက အားဖြင့် One_Ring_Blender_Render.png 2.97 MB PNG ကားရှာမှ 44 တောင် အ >ring enhances the most powerful quality of an species >that's why frodo and Bilbo go invisible, they are hobbits that are stealthy What would happen if other races or characters used the ring? : Anonymous >>192560634 (OP) # >black man puts on ring >his d--- grows even bigger 11/28/23(Tue)04:20:28 No.192561142

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Marriage Under the Lens | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 114 KB JPG 11/27/23(Mon)20:58:48 No.75570473 >be me >go out with coworkers on thanksgiving eve >everyone has the next day off so why not get krunk >after a few hours the bros go home and I'm the only guy at the table >coworker is having some problems with her marriage, something she talks about often >someone asks her why she even got married >she flatly admits it's because she didn't like getting c-- in her mouth >she knew once she got married she could stop doing b------- and his only options would be to deal with it or get divorced >think back to friend who said his wife immediately stopped doing b------- after the marriage >wonder how common this is

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Greentext Stories - Hiking Misadventures | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous Hiking 111 KB JPG waterfalls 11/28/23(Tue)02:55:12 No.75573597 >Try taking my family to a fun, calming nature hike in the American wilderness >Pick out an easy, flat footpath >Trail is made of a wooden bridge over a beautiful marshland in fall. Super easy, lots of sights including mountain views and >.... >Family gets THREE HUNDRED METERS in and turns around. >Mother: What are we even doing this for? Are we going into town on the other side? It's a loop >Sisters: Eww we got mud all over our sneakers!!! It's less than 50m of mud trail before the boardwalk (One of them is nearly f------ 30 btw) Why do I even try? Honestly I was hoping to find one person I can go on hikes with but I guess it wasn't their jam.

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