Found this gem on page 192 of the 1ed Dungeon Masters Guide. Spice up your Urban npc encounters queue the "lusty bards" ment, or morder: 20% Harlot encounters can be with brazen strumpets or haughty courtesans, thus making it difficult for the party to distinguish each encounter for what it is. (In fact, the encounter could be with a dancer only prostituting herself as it pleases her, an elderly madam, or even a pimp.) In addition to the offering of the usual fare, the harlot is 30% likely to know valuable information, 15% likely to make something up in order to gain a reward, and 20% likely to be, or work with, a thief. You may find it useful to use the sub-table below to see which sort of harlot encounter takes place: 01-10 Slovenly trull 11-25 Brazen strumpet 26-35 Cheap trollop 36-50 Typical streetwalker 51-65 Saucy tart 66-75 Wanton wench 76-85 Expensive doxy Haughty courtesan 86-90 91-92 Aged madam 93-94 Wealthy procuress 95-98 Sly pimp 99-00 Rich panderer An expensive doxy will resemble a gentlewoman, a haughty courtesan a noblewoman, the other harlots might be mistaken for goodwives, and so forth. ...so it's cool if I play a Warforged Redemption Paladin with a pimping background, right?

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AHG!! GOBBLINS! AAA!! Do You MEAN FOBLINS I'M BEING GOBBLED! AAAAAAA!! I GOT THIS DONT YOU F------ DARE

IT TOOK ME DOZENS OF SESSIONS OVER SEVERAL YEARS TO RULE A CITY BY THE END OF THE CAMPAIGN. YOU JUST ROLLED A 20 AND YOUR DM GAVE YOU A CITY. WE ARE NOT THE SAME. imgflip.com

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Did they even try to balance magic items ? | /r/dndmemes

WE BALANCED MAGIC ITEMS UNDER THE IDEA THAT THE RARER THE MAGIC ITEM IS, THE MORE POWERFUL IT IS imgfli.com NAME ONE VERY RARE MAGIC ITEM THAT'S BETTER FOR A DRUID THEN A RARE STAFF OF THE WOODLANDS

Jeremy Crawford explaining why you get your subclass features at level 3 in one dnd | /r/dndmemes

B8-33751 imgflip.com WELL YOU KIND OF MAKE A PACT WITH YOUR PATRON AT LEVEL ONE BUT IT'S NOT A REAL PATRON UNLESS IT IS, AND THEN YOU REMAKE IT AT LEVEL 3 OR SOMETHING, IDGAF fitm MIT WELL YOU MAKE YOUR PACT WITH YOUR PATRON RIGHT AT LEVEL ONE, BUT YOU DON'T DEVELOP ANY ABILITY THAT IS COMPLETELY UNIQUE TO THAT PATRON SPECIFICALLY UNTIL YOU GET YOUR SUBCLASS FEATURES AT LEVEL 3 KUH 8621 This is brilliant. K.QM 8621 But I like this.

Don't poke the DM | /r/dndmemes

When your players piss you off, so you decide to punish them, but then decide to be more rational about it Kraken Tarrasque

Learning his sight words like a lil champ. I'm so proud | /r/dndmemes

D&D TIP FROM A 4-YEAR-OLD The Baby DM I showed this to my 4 month old and he had a lot to say, and I quote: "The supposition that halflings and gnomes are the same without the hat is preposterous. There are both physiological differences as well as mechanical differences in the fifth edition. For starters, gnomes are known to have a lush beard while halflings are follicly challenged around the mandible and the mental protuberence. The mechanical differences are plentiful as well, but let me focus on the main difference. Halflings have the ability to reroll a 1 on a d20, which decreases the chance for a nat 1 from 1/20 to 1/400. Gnomes make up for it with their resistance to magical effects and darkvision." A GNOME WITHOUT A FUNNY HAT IS JUST A HALFLING. Pool Baby P M

You must believe in the heart of the die | /r/dndmemes

HEY, EVERYBODY! HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT Dice Personalities

After 2 years, please learn your character or just stop playing | /r/dndmemes

imgflip.com Spend 49 sessions over 3 years playing a campaign They ask "What do I add for advantage?" The monk has advantage! They roll a d20 The monk doesn't know what advantage is? It's been 2 years...

Well...does it? | /r/dndmemes

IF A LADY VILLAIN LIKES WOMEN, DOES THAT MAKE THEM A LESBBEG? Huh? Sorry, that was a strange thing to ask. imgflip.com

Alignment Chart of Alignment Charts. | /r/dndmemes

$the planes of existence chaotic-neutral good. chaotic Good allem chotic goodneutral chaos chaotic neutral o videodegon | chaotic-evil neutral artalphn chaotic evil sodacs LN anye chaotic-neutral evil each plane has Layers-ex. clysm and cach layer has pealms-exvalhalla LN(G) ethed LN(E) LG LE inconum Good neutral Good \NG(L) Conformity/ Tradition Security the ative matc SAROY ve mate NE(L) astial hells neutral evit EVIL Power - NG JARU LARLARUS Benevolence Universalism NE Lawful-neutral Good the same lands the sevenheavens Lawful Good Achieve- ment seven heavens Lawful good NGỌC) Olympus parades Lawful neutral SUCES hades NE(C) smodeus Lawful-neutral evil Self-Direction Lawful-goodneutral Lawful evil CG Stimulation Lawful neutralis naturale chaotic neutral is natural phenommon -the greenman the hounedoad- Lawful-evil neutral CE Hedonism CN(E) CN(G) CN Lawful Social Neutral Rebel Evil Evil Evil Evil Lawful Neutral Lawful Social Neutral Rebel Chaotic Good Good Good Good Good Lawful Social Neutral Rebel Chaotic Moral Moral Moral Moral Moral Lawful Social True Rebel Chaotic Neutral Neutral Neutral Neutral Neutral Law Lawful Social Neutral Rebel Chaotic Impure Impure Impure Impure Impure Chaotic Evil Lawful Evil Saintly LAWFUL GOOD LAWFUL NEUTRAL Diabolic LAWFUL EVIL Lawful Good Lawful Neutral MORE REALISTIC ALIGNMENT CHART ADHERENCE TO MORAL ABSOLUTES Neutral Good NEUTRAL Neutral LAWFUL GOOD LAWFUL NEUTRAL LAWFUL EVIL Neutral Chaotic Good Good CHAOTIC GOOD Lawful Neutral Chaotic Evil Evil Evil Neutral NEUTRAL GOOD TRUE NEUTRAL CHAOTIC NEUTRAL CHAOTIC EVIL NEUTRAL EVIL Beatific Chaotic Neutral CHAONC GOOD Demoniac CHAOTIC NEUTRAL CHAOTIC EVIL CONSISTENCY OF BEHAVIORAL CODE PARADOX ZONE (IMPOSSIBLE) EXTREME ZONE (UNLIKELY) Neutral Evil LAMMASU LAW BLINK DOG BLUE DRAGON Ents Hippogriffs Hobbits Patriarchs BEHOLDER Pegasi Unicoms Centaurs Dwarves Gnomes Rocs GOOD APE NEUTRAL COCKATRICE LAWFUL & NEUTRAL Chaotic Good EVIL Nixies Pixies Purple Worms Sea Monsters Wyverns NEUTRAL BUGBEAR Animals Dryads Griffons Hydrae CHAOTIC & NEUTRAL NEUTRAL Chimerae Dragons Lycanthropes Giants Balrogs Evil High Priests Gargoyles Ghouls Gnolls Goblins Cas Gorgons Hobgoblins Kobolds Mummies Medusae Manticores Spectres Trolls Vampires Wights Wraths Chaotic Neutral Men ALL ALIGNMENTS Orcs CHAOTIC BRASS DRAGON Minotaurs CHAOS DEMON • Good: Freedom and kindness. • Lawful Good: Civilization and order. • Evil: Tyranny and hatred. • Chaotic Evil: Entropy and destruction. • Unaligned: Having no alignment; not taking a stand. Chaotic Evil$

CHAD Stat Generation | /r/dndmemes

Rolling for Stats "My group rolls 3d12 drop lowest minus 4 for our stats." "NO! That's not a good way to roll your stats! The best way is to roll 3d6 in order and reroll all if the total of the ability scores is lower than 68, unless you have two scores- higher than 16 and..." Using Point Buy "I made an array of balanced stats without any drama or weird rules." "Me too."

Wizard fashion comes in many forms. What is your favorite? | /r/dndmemes

By А Pointy hat cool long hair / beard long roles The classic <Shorter hair/ beard Bags to keep important things gloves to touch stuff safely The explorer Capable of using armor Cool tattos •Weapons and Muscles + Magic The war Mage -Clothes covering everything ??? The Mysterious Nice Suit -Definitely not a spell Storing Ping Definitely not a Magical staff Definitely not a Wizard staff broke. Fixed it with glue and tape First shirt be Saw before leaving home Finds it Comfy Too Powerful to care

My character got enough money to buy night owl goggles for a dark vision (everyone else in my part could see in the dark) and thus, this was born | /r/dndmemes

Roll for initiative! | /r/dndmemes

DM: You enter a cavern. Party: What do we see? DM: A snail. Party: *relief* Ah, ok! The snail: prompts @kokosima

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No need to make your own D&D with blackjack and hookers, it's already available in RAW. | /r/dndmeme...

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Did they even try to balance magic items ? | /r/dndmemes

Jeremy Crawford explaining why you get your subclass features at level 3 in one dnd | /r/dndmemes

Don't poke the DM | /r/dndmemes

Learning his sight words like a lil champ. I'm so proud | /r/dndmemes

You must believe in the heart of the die | /r/dndmemes

After 2 years, please learn your character or just stop playing | /r/dndmemes

Well...does it? | /r/dndmemes

Alignment Chart of Alignment Charts. | /r/dndmemes

CHAD Stat Generation | /r/dndmemes

Wizard fashion comes in many forms. What is your favorite? | /r/dndmemes

My character got enough money to buy night owl goggles for a dark vision (everyone else in my part could see in the dark) and thus, this was born | /r/dndmemes

Roll for initiative! | /r/dndmemes

Dungeons and Dragons - No need to make your own D&D with blackjack and hookers, it's already available in RAW. | /r/dndmeme...

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