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Minion On the Cross / Crucified Minion - What has a Minion Ever Done To You!?

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What has a minion ever done to you? F------ nothing!!! You are a p------------ that should be on that cross not a f------ toy minion f------ looser Like Reply 1-2 hrs - Edited Dolan Dark You know my name not my story. It all started when I was 5 years old,I loved minions so much, on my first day of school and my mum had bought me a bright yellow minion backpack to keep my school work in. I was so incredibly happy. Mum loved minions too, she would post quotes about them on her facebook everyday. I remember getting on the schoolbus and smiling and waving at her from the back of the bus as we drove off on the way to school. This was my last happy memory. I turned and faced the front. Immediately a large kid who must've been at least 12 pointed at me and said "nice backpack f--, if you love minions so much why dont you marry them?" The bus erupted in laughter, and from then on I was known as minion boy. The teasing continued throughout school, I got rid of the minion backpack but mum had replaced all my clothes with minion clothes, my food was all banana flavored and sponsored by Minions. I couldn't stand it. Minions continued to follow me into my teenager years, every day becoming worse than before. Mum was now posting 10 minion quotes on my facebook page per day. One night, I must've been around 16 years old, I was feeling sick so I walked into my parents room only to find my dad was ramming my mum from behind in a full Minion suit. That was enough to scar anyone for life. I couldn't take it it anymore, I ran away from home to live with a friend. Days later I was called up, my parents had been killed in a car crash, they had been killed by a car painted to look like a minion. Minions had destroyed my life. I had nothing to live for. I went down to the hardware store to look for a rope. Everywhere I looked the ropes were bright Yellow with those little f------ minion eyes on them. I tried looking for razor blades, bright yellow razors stared back at me, I went to try bleach, Banana flavoured Minion bleach filled the shelves. I couldn't do it, I took the Minion themed bus back home and sat in my room and cried all night. Police showed up at my door the next day, they were to take me to a lawyer to give my parent's will. I was told I had been left nothing as mum had spent $10434929 on Minion merchandise, and the house would have to be sold, as I was leaving the office the lawyer said "Oh there is one thing" he reached into a drawer and pulled out a small stuffed Minion toy. What happened to that toy is self explantory

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