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File: 1369223080498.png-(119 KB, 462x368, Xbox_One_Console_and_Controller.png) G I Anonymous (ID: suNAaXxr) 05/22/13(Wed)07:44:40 No.481838430 Replies >2050, Tesco Village #83, England >See on the telescreen that the new Xbox has been announced Ask my parents to buy it for me >All 3 of them say yes >Order it from Tesco.com >Pull my identification papers and so >Waddle down to the Tescos on the corner to buy an Xbox LIVE subscription >Decide to spend big and get the 48 hour card me euros out of my purse to pay extra due to the White Man Tax >By the time I get home the xbox has arrived >Set it all up >Point the Kinect camera at my face >Attach all the wires and such to my body >Television and Xbox are activated by my heartbeat >Needle shoots out of Kinect and into my finger to take a blood sample for authorisation >Raise my arm so the camera can scan my Tesco barcode tattooed onto my wrist >Sit down in Kinect gaming chair >IV drip goes in one arm >Catheter inserted >No reason to get up at all now >Call of Duty: WWll starts >Brief memorial to the 25 million Jews killed in the Holocaust appears >Half an hour of adverts >First level starts >Finish it in 30 seconds >Quickly download the Level 1.5 DLC >Half an hour of adverts start >Hear an aeroplane outside, look out of the window >A voice from the telescreen tells me to pay attention >Entire gameplay is about 7 minutes, adverts make the game last 3 hours >Finish playing game >Xbox crushes disc so l can't play it again for free >Xbox automatically updates my Facebook, Twitter, Youtube, Tumblr and 4chan accounts >All wires from chair remove themselves from my body >Get up and walk out of room >Kinect camera follows my motions >Suddenly my Apple iMplant starts to ring >My non-binary genderqueer friend wants me to meet xir at the Ed Miliband memorial cemetery 15 minutes later, arrive at the cemetery >Can't see xir >Microsoft Agent steps out from behind a tree >Asks me why I haven't been on the Xbox for over 20 minutes >Before I can answer he says something else >Can't hear what he is saying because Orwell and Huxley are spinning really loudly in their graves >> D Anonymous (ID: TaoZftmu) 05/22/13(Wed)07:47:31 No.481 838647 Ps Awesome Anonymous (ID: JI 181HI) 05/22/13(Wed)07:47:50 No.481 838674 Ps

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It's time for you to look inward, and begin asking yourself the big questions Do you all still defend the Xbox, a line of consoles, or are you just defenders of Game Pass?

Cra @C This dude beat me in Madden so bad I told him I was 11 years old lilST Madden NFL 21 - Kankeu via.... U suck bro Sorry. Im only 11 My bad ge you are really good for your age Keep up the good work Reply: Mom never lets me play. She said im too fat. She calls me fat boy NETFLIX 0/500 R HELPA Xbox One

I just thought this story was funny, while explaining branding that continues over 20 years later.

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File: 1369223080498.png-(119 KB, 462x368, Xbox_One_Console_and_Controller.png) G I Anonymous (ID: suNAaXxr) 05/22/13(Wed)07:44:40 No.481838430 Replies >2050, Tesco Village #83, England >See on the telescreen that the new Xbox has been announced Ask my parents to buy it for me >All 3 of them say yes >Order it from Tesco.com >Pull my identification papers and so >Waddle down to the Tescos on the corner to buy an Xbox LIVE subscription >Decide to spend big and get the 48 hour card me euros out of my purse to pay extra due to the White Man Tax >By the time I get home the xbox has arrived >Set it all up >Point the Kinect camera at my face >Attach all the wires and such to my body >Television and Xbox are activated by my heartbeat >Needle shoots out of Kinect and into my finger to take a blood sample for authorisation >Raise my arm so the camera can scan my Tesco barcode tattooed onto my wrist >Sit down in Kinect gaming chair >IV drip goes in one arm >Catheter inserted >No reason to get up at all now >Call of Duty: WWll starts >Brief memorial to the 25 million Jews killed in the Holocaust appears >Half an hour of adverts >First level starts >Finish it in 30 seconds >Quickly download the Level 1.5 DLC >Half an hour of adverts start >Hear an aeroplane outside, look out of the window >A voice from the telescreen tells me to pay attention >Entire gameplay is about 7 minutes, adverts make the game last 3 hours >Finish playing game >Xbox crushes disc so l can't play it again for free >Xbox automatically updates my Facebook, Twitter, Youtube, Tumblr and 4chan accounts >All wires from chair remove themselves from my body >Get up and walk out of room >Kinect camera follows my motions >Suddenly my Apple iMplant starts to ring >My non-binary genderqueer friend wants me to meet xir at the Ed Miliband memorial cemetery 15 minutes later, arrive at the cemetery >Can't see xir >Microsoft Agent steps out from behind a tree >Asks me why I haven't been on the Xbox for over 20 minutes >Before I can answer he says something else >Can't hear what he is saying because Orwell and Huxley are spinning really loudly in their graves >> D Anonymous (ID: TaoZftmu) 05/22/13(Wed)07:47:31 No.481 838647 Ps Awesome Anonymous (ID: JI 181HI) 05/22/13(Wed)07:47:50 No.481 838674 Ps

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