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Image #835,919
Uploaded by Kung Fu Cthulhu Sep 24, 2014 at 06:02PM EDT
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![File: VNWarlmage.ipg (32 KB, 450x370) Anonymous (ID: qDbZPoX) 05/26/14(Mon)14:03:45 No.548178737 [Reply]548179405 On patrol with my unit not far from the Laos border Deep in the s---, keeping an eye out for VC around every coner >Already had a friend sent home down a foot after he stepped in a punji pit >Find our way to a forest path, stop to reconnoiter >Suddenly out of the bush, d--- still in his hands from pissing or jerking off, comes a VC >Couldn't be older than 17, has a hairlip and a glass eye (glorious socialist medicine in action) >Screams when he sees us, tries to somersault into the bushes >Accidentally handstands, drops on his head, knocks himself out cold When we stop laughing, me and the boys cart him back to base for interrogation >Lock him in the sweathouse, sneak around back of the showers to shotgun weed with my team >Next morning Open the sweathouse up, gag instantly from the smell >Kid is a mess, has p----- and s--- himself multiple times >Bit through his good lip struggling, has managed to dislocate both arms tugging against the chains >Youngest member of my team has to go sit down, real shaken up Of course this is the day the colonel performs inspections >Comes and sees the kid chained up in the sweathouse >Starts chewing us out for pulling a major FUBAR >My CO can't find a good explanation (later demoted for it) >I step up to save the whole team's ass Suddenly realize I don't have an excuse >"What is it, corporal?" >I hesitate, trying not to look the colonel in the eye >Try to think of something, anything to say >When nothing comes, I clear my throat and wing it: "Sir..." >"He has no style, he has no grace:" >"This Cong has a funny face." >"He can handstand when he needs to" S"and stretch his arms out just for you." >Promoted on the spot, later given honorable discharge](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/835/847/e4c.jpg "e4c.jpg")
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Uploaded Sep 24, 2014 at 06:02PM EDT
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Kung Fu Cthulhu
Researcher & Treasurer & Elocutionist & Media Bus Boy
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