Yo! You must login or signup first!

ENthe ONION FIFA Frantically Annof aIN THIS SECTION + FIFA Frantically Announces 2015 Summer World Cup In United States Global Soccer Tournament To Kick Off In America Later This Afternoon ARTICLE May 27, 2015 VOL 51 ISSUE 21 Sports World Womens Sports And Soccer Fifa FIFA ZURICH-After the Justice Department indicted numerous executives from world soccer's governing body on charges of corruption and bribery, frantic and visibly nervous officials from FIFA held an impromptu press conference Wednesday to announce that the United States has been selected to host this summer's 2015 World Cup. "We are thrilled to reveal that, for the first time in 21 years, the World Cup will finally return to America, with matches set to kick off today at 5 p.m. local time in Los Angeles," said FIFA president Sepp Blatter, smiling broadly before unveiling the tournament's official logo, a hand-drawn stick figure kicking a soccer ball with “USA 2015!" hastily scribbled in black marker above its head. “with world-class venues in cities across the country and a rapidly growing passion for the sport, the U.S. is the perfect choice-really the only choice-for this summer's tournament. Everyone at FIFA is certain that the 2015 World Cup in America will be a tremendous success, and billions of fans from around the world will, in justa few hours, come together to enjoy this wonderful display of soccer over the coming weeks." At press time, the U.S. national team was leading defending champions Germany in the World Cup's opening match after being awarded 12 penalties in the game's first three minutes.

+5

"FIFA Frantically Announces 2015 Summer World Cup In The United States: Global Soccer Tournament To Kick Off In America Later This Afternoon"


Uploaded by Brad Jun 01, 2015 at 03:28PM EDT

Share Pin Download More

Origin Entry: The Onion

File type: jpg

Resolution: (719px x 983px)

File size: 330 KB


the ONION America's Finest News Source Breaking News: The Onion on the verge of collapse after not being able to make up s that is more idiotic than current reality.
NEWS IN BRIEF Conservative Man Proudly Frightened Of Everything Published October 10, 2022 | Alerts
me DOOM! www. "A.I. TECHNOLOGY" WILL DECIMATE OUR LIVELIHOODS! GLOOM! O S *LATEST FAD CHICKEN LITTLES * NATIONAL CARTOONIST LEAGUE 2023 CONFERENCE, intimoanis. THE END IS NEAR! 규 000000 SEASONED 4))) PROS DISCREET FLASKS COMPUTER, DRAW ME A CARTOON ABOUT TODAY'S LAZY TEENS WHO REFUSE TO WORK. AND BE SURE TO SIGN IT "KELLY"! PAYCHECK$ $ WHIRRRR "RENDERED" OBSOL-SWEET! BEEP! I WILL OBEY. BOOP! PROGRESS PRINTER O DELIVER TO EDITOR DOO Kelly 2023 ONION SYNDICATE 333 ATUU
View All 141 Images

Load 2 Comments

More:

0
+5

The Onion - "FIFA Frantically Announces 2015 Summer World Cup In The United States: Global Soccer Tournament To Kick Off In America Later This Afternoon"

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.


◄ Previous View Gallery Random Image Next ►

More:


+ Add a Comment

Comments (2)


Display Comments

Add a Comment


+ Add an Image

Image Details

355 views (4 from today)

Uploaded Jun 01, 2015 at 03:28PM EDT

Origin Entry

The Onion

Tags

the onion, fifa, corruption scandal, satire, satirical news

Claim Authorship Edit History
Textile Embed