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harkness test comic

What Is The 'Harkness Test,' And When Should You Use It?

If the existence of the Harkness test is any indication, decades of exposure to sci-fi and fantasy literature, anthropomorphic Pokémon and sexy cartoon dragons have reduced the average media consoomer's brain to mush. Why else would one need a written guideline to know what to and what not to bump nasties with?

Bronies are bad enough but still wildly popular, so what grounds do we have to tell the average weirdo, "No, you CANNOT fuck Alakazam." Here's a guide to help you guide yourself through the rich and treacherous terrain of pan-species sex, Jack Harkness style.


Where Does The 'Harkness Test' Come From?

Fans of the wildly popular TV show Doctor Who would know of the existence of the handsome and omnisexual Captain Jack Harkness, a notorious flirt with no regard for differences in language, shape or species.



However, Harkness did practice some discretion in picking his partners, a sort of checklist that was immortalized in fan art and meme form by a responsible Furry citizen by the username BeakieHelmet in early 2013. The test outlines a few simple clauses for hitting on a possible non-human mate. Are they smart enough to understand you? Can they communicate consent (or anything) clearly? Are they "of age" for their own species?


SO YOU WANT TO F--- A FICTIONAL CREATURE? Give it the Harkness test first! Does it have Human Intelligence (or "greater")? Can it talk or otherwise communicate with language*? Is it of sexual maturity for its species? If the answer to all three is "yes" then you can f--- it! It's a nonhuman creature with sentience and all you need to have consentual sex with. If you answered "no" to one or more, watch out! That's b--------- or possibly p---------! Don't f--- it! Here is an illustrated guide: Are you an adult? Are you an adult? HISS! Certainly Do you want to Puck? Do you want to Puck? GRONK! OP COurse-! DO NOT F--- THIS It's OK to f--- this! Body language is a dangerous road. As always, err on the side of caution Only rely on body language if both parties have attempted communication through different means and failed due to language barriers and other special situations.

'Harkness Test' Usage In Memes

And who better to impose a set of reasonable rules about consensual inter-species romance than the most notorious of furry lovers? The first variant of the meme took direct shots at Bronies, who are stereotyped as middle-aged Discord mods fetishizing anthropomorphic horses from a children's cartoon. Other early variants included defenders of the Zootopia bunny fan club.


SO YOU WANT TO F--- A FICTIONAL CREATURE? Give it the Harkness test first! Does it have Human Intelligence (or "greater")? can it talk or otherwise communicate with language"? Is it of sexual maturity for its species? If the answer to all three is “yes" then you can f--- it! It's a nonhuman creature with sentience and a" you need to have consentual sex with. If you answered “no" to one or more, watch out! That's b--------- or possibly p---------! Don't f--- it! Here is an illustrated guide: Are ou an adult? Are ou an adult? NEiGH! Certainly. Do voU want to Puck? Do voU want to Puch? WHiNNY! OP course-! DO NOT F--- THIS It's OK to f--- this! *Body language is a dangerous road. As always, err on the side of caution. Only rely on body language if both parties have attempted communicatiorn through different means and failed due to language barriers and other Special situations. SO YOU WANT TO F--- A FICTIONAL CREATURE? Give it the Harkness test first! Does it have Human Intelligence (or "greater")? Can it talk or otherwise communicate with language? ls it of sexual maturity for its species? If the answer to all three is "yes" then you can f--- it! It's a nonhuman creature with sapience and all you need to have consentual sex with. If you answered “no" to one or more, watch out! That's b--------- or possibly p---------! Don't f--- it! Here is an illustrated guide: Are you an adult? Are you an adult? Squeak! Certainly. Do you want to Puck? Do you want to Puck? Chirp! t's called a hustle eethea DO NOT F--- THIS It's OK to f--- this! Body language is a dangerous road. As always, err on the side of caution. Only rely on body language if both parties have attempted communication through different means and failed due to language barriers and other special situations.

Where Can I Use The 'Harkness Test'?

The Harkness Test is a useful guideline for when you are unsure about your fictional listings, but some creators have taken more liberties with the rules than others: a 2019 Plague of Gripes led to a resurgence in the popularity of the term after it implied that Pokémon were sexually active partners.



For the full history of the Harkness Test, be sure to check out our entry on the slang term here for even more information.

Related Memes 4 total

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Furry Scale

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Doctor Who

A photo of Furries at a furry convention.

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