Forums / Fun! / Just For Fun

(I just got this funny little idea from a youtube comment section.)
Basically, it's a court situation, with us as the prosecution, the defense, so on and so forth.
Now, I need a prosecutor, a defense attorney, a Defendant, and a crime.
(Yes, you are encouraged to RP as Phoenix Wright characters.)

I am not very good at this so I will expectate as I love this idea.

The crime is:

Liking Nickelback and saying they are better than Radiohead.

I propose that the crime be grand apricot theft.

Would appreciate a somewhat serious crime, but if no other choices are offered, this is the go-to one.

Ill be the solicitor, which is the UK equivalent to the defense attorney?

I'll be persecution, how about for crime: Urinating on the white house lawn excessively.

okay then!
Current status:
Judge: Captain Douglas J Falcon
Prosecutor: Crona Ampora
Defense Attorney: Samurai
Defendant: N/A
Crime: Grand Theft Apricot, Urination on the white house lawn, and liking Nickelback better than Radiohead.
We Need a defendant

I can be defendant?!?

Sure Brah.
(BTW this is a Bench Trial)

We are currently in trial against Digoxin, for Theft of Apricots, Vandalism of the White House Lawn, and Liking Nickelback better than Radiohead. Does the Prosecution have an opening statement?"

(Sorry for the abruptness, but I sort of don't know how trials work in the beginning. Sorta going off of Phoenix Wright here.)

Yes, your honour. *Gets up, clears throat* The atrocious apricot theft that took place leaves a bad taste in my mouth. A taste reminiscent of rotten apricots. In addition, I am DISGUSTED by those who would defile the lawn of our commander-in-chief, and liking Nickleback more than Radiohead? Your honour, that's just dumb. No further comment, your honour.

Does the defendant have a statement?

Samurai, you have to give it your best. I'm sure Crona or somebody else has framed me, because I'm a nice cat that wouldn't ever steal or urinate on the White House. Besides, I don't even know what Radiohead is.
EDIT: I took too much time writing that.
Um… okay… First of all, I have been inside my house playing TF2 and CoD for the last 3 days, so I couldn't have possibly stolen or damaged anything. Besides, I don't know Radiohead and only heard 2 songs from Nikelbik or whatever it's called.

Defense Attorney? Statement?

Right.

This apricot theft incident, any witnesses? was the tree from which they were plucked damaged or the means of which to obtain said apricot in breach of a trespass law?

Any witnesses as to the public urination accusation?

And as for Digoxins preference in music, he is entitled to the right of freedom of expression.

I find these to be most crude allegations.

Now, Mr. Ampora, Do you have any witnesses to call up?
(Gonna be needing witnesses people)

I saw the pissing.

Mr… uh, Samurai? That's the only name I have here. You should begin the Cross Examination of our Witness.

When exactly did the piss take place?

Do we have a courtyard
I want to play ball in the courtyard

Yeah. We have a place outside.
Don't get yourself killed out there.

Your honor, I think this thread… I mean, session is being derailed. Mister Cale does not sound legit at all, and I don't think anyone has witnessed me urinating.
DO WE WINZ?!?!!!?!!1

GUILTY! I SAY GUILTY! SEND HIM TO THE GALLOWS! OFF WITH HIS HEAD!

Wait, what was the crime again?

(Alright. Going to bring this thread back on track.)
Someone please escort Egg Man out of here, And since Cale isn't responding, we need a new witness. Crona?

(>2:00am here)

This court hearing will have to continue in the morning. I do believe I just went into maximum over-tired.

Opens briefcase in corner of court and in an amazing feat of physics a bed folds out, sleep

Alright. We shall take a gigantic recess for everyone to rest up.

Doctor Robotnik. Do you want me to abort you from time again?
Let's not forget the countless times you have tried to mutilate mister Sonic and his friends, or the animals that would have died if it wasn't for the aforementioned Hedgehog.
EDIT AGAIN:
Samurai, we have to find proof that someone else urinated in the meantime.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN "ESCORT EGG MAN OUT!?" I HAVE EVERY MUCH A RIGHT TO BE HERE AS ANY OF Y- *door shuts*

That's because I was found dead in the courtyard.

Oh, can I be jury?

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUN
WE HAVE A NEW TRIAL ON OUR HANDS, FOLKS!
(@ BlackWolfYellowEyes: These are bench trials, so no jury. you CAN be a witness, though. There are also spots to fill in the new trial.)

Trial 1: Apricot Theft, Lawn Vandalism, Liking Nickelback
Judge: Captain Douglas J Falcon
Prosecutor: Crona Ampora
Defense Attorney: Samurai
Defendant: Digoxin

Trial 2: Murder of Cale, The Witch King of Cats
Judge: N/A
Prosecutor: N/A
Defense Attorney: N/A
Defendant: N/A

Can I be the judge for the trial of Cale's muder if I promise to behave?

Prosecutor in the murder case sounds fun

Seeing that the court is a SNAFU, permission to toast the more rowdy patrons of the court with fire spells your honour?

I volunteer as solicitor for the trial of the murder, good sir!

Can I be defendant?

Oh, how about I be security? I'm quite strong ,and as you can see in my avatar, i carry a mean bite!

I saw Cale heading out that day. I minded my own business, and let him be, but after about a minute I heard screaming, and when I went out I found him dead, and Lone K standing over him with a bloody dagger!

I ran back inside and called the cops as soon as possible!

I just awoke from my slumber and my

For some more defending

How could you be so sure that the weapon used to kill Cale was a dagger? It wasn't presented as evidence, nor was it mentioned by the judge!

The only possible explanation I can come up with as to how you know the weapon…

Is that you committed the murder!

Case closed, now I want a latte!

(spills on self) AHHH! MOTHERF*CKER!!!

Guys, The trials haven't started yet.
(The trials will start when I get home, which is about 4 or 5 PM EST)

Trial 1: Apricot Theft, Lawn Vandalism, Liking Nickelback
Judge: Captain Douglas J Falcon
Prosecutor: Crona Ampora
Defense Attorney: Samurai
Defendant: Digoxin

Trial 2: Murder of Cale, The Witch King of Cats
Judge: Rob O.T. Nik
Prosecutor: Emi
Defense Attorney: markhaox14
Defendant: Lone K. the CarloSCOUT

WHAT!?

Oh… uh… my bad, your honor.

I look forward to putting this guy behind bars.
(Obligatory Gordot GIF)

Looks like I got some tough competition… better bring in my defense aide… Klavier Gavin!


Oh, you're doomed now, mate. (Thumbs up if you've seen Phoenix Wright: BS Evolved)

First, your honour, I'd like to call to the stand my first witness… Myself. *Walks up to the stand, sits down* Blah bluh whole truth nothing but it. *Clears throat*
About two days ago, I was going for my midmorning job across town. It was then that I saw two people sitting in a car, chowing down on what I could see were Apricots. A song came on, I believe it was "Karma Police." One of the men, whose face I knew to be Digoxin, insisted that they change the radio to his mix tap because, and I quote, "This shit sucks bro." Radiohead. Sucks.

MURDER! MURDER!!! MURDER!

Yes, terribly true! I saw it! There, in the courtyard! THERE IS WHERE LEOX DIED!!!

le large collective gasp

THEN WHO WAS PHONE?

… But Witch King died.
(Also trials are not in session until the judge says so.)