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While taking a college entry test (SAT) I was horny as fuck. Now this normally wouldn't be weird but I was like piss-horny. Like my vision was clouding up, my head was pounding almost to where it hurt, my crotch was fucking sore, and my test just stopped existing. It lasted for like a solid 15 minutes I was dying. I feel like that's the level of horny fuckin lions get when they're killing each other over mates.

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So, got any stories?

I can (frequently do) fap to pictures of fully clothed women or just a woman's face. I don't undress them with my mind or fantasize or anything, I just think pretty faces are one of the sexiest things about women.

like this photo is porn to me

I don't masturbate like most chicks do.

…. I mean, I don't touch myself or use toys or anything, I just squeeze my legs together and then shit happens.

• Sometimes I try to think about cute/hot girls taking a shit.
• I actually have a inflation fetish and transformation fetish that I will hate forever but everytime I think about it I get a boner
• I don't masterbate but I try all my might to hold down my dick
• Sometimes I will try to force myself to like futa
• I frequently go commando and when I get boners i have to hide.
• I would date anything as long as it had a human personality and had the characteristics of a female.

I like how this particular post got 3 upvotes just because it was related to female masturbation

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@ontopic

• My head gets ridiculously itchy whenever I'm sweaty, to the point in which I lose focus if I don't scratch my head. This has discourage me from doing physical exercise, thus making me a pathetic indoor-dweller

• I get extremely agitated when somebody touches my computer.

• my dick leans to the right

@Lurk
Yeah, the amount of upvotes that post got stood out to me too. XD
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-I find the idea of being inside of someone attractive and/or romantic, which is probably part of the reason why I have a vore fetish.

-I sometimes have really bizarre, implausible sexual fantasies whose weirdness rivals that of some H mangas.

-I have become so used to lusting over adult bodies that I think that lusting over people younger than 16 makes me a pedophile despite my young-ish age.

- When I was a kid, I used to go into my bedroom and take my pants and underwear off for no reason. My dad walked in on me one time….

The position I jerk off in is somewhere between sitting and lying.
It's just the most comfortable way to do it.
Any way, that position results in my dick pointing directly at my face, so I frequently give myself accidental facials.
That's not the TMI part.
No, the TMI part is that I kind of enjoy it.
I never do it on purpose, but I'm always happy that it happened.
Yay, jizz!

My dick is dysfunctional. All but a very small surface area at the frenulum (underside of the glans) is completely insensitive, and as a result I physically can't masturbate in the style that most men do; at this point I am almost certain that intercourse will be equally as impossible to perform. It is my belief that I received a botched (or accurately speaking, more botched than usual) circumcision, and have seriously considered the possibility of suing the hospital where I was born for damages… at least enough to pay for an operation (that hopefully exists or will exist sometime in the near future) to fix this problem.

More TMI
The first time I ever fapped, it was to this image:

While I consider myself heterosexual……..I kinda something for traps…..

Not because of "ugh it's a girl with dick" but……. I find most traps/transsexuals sexy….

Jesus. and i thought i was weird. You people take the fucking cake

See here.

@Triple,

Get out of here you fucking normie.

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@on topic

I fapped to castration porn once…it made me cum in seconds

ITT:

A friend of mine once said "TillsterRulz wants to have sex exclusively with lucario and german tanks" and he is mostly correct

I fap naked and cum into old/dirty pairs of underwear

I sometimes get turned on by winning in video games (I once fapped to a game of CounterStrike: Source)

>This thread

@Tillster

I fap naked

Wait, doesn't everyone? Is it normal to fap with clothes on?

Who does that?

"Most" of my friends say they fap with clothes on or just unbuckle their belt/pants. Probably just in case someone walks in on them and it's an easy recovery.

why did you even come in here

ITT: Pooping.

HUSH RANDOMMAN YOU KNEW WHAT I MEANT.

Yes. Like you said: Shit.

….

….

….

Bah! >:\/

Anyway, one day I got mucus on my hand I got this really strong urge to eat it… I had to hurry up and clean my hand so I didn't.

Sometimes, whenever I'm holding something like a knife or some kind of long, thin object, I imagine what would happen if I rammed it into my eye socket. I don't know why tho.

I Lie alot, i lie almost 5 or more a day. it's mostly because i like fucking with people and sometimes to get them off my back.

and now to masturbation, unlike you guys i can't masturbate. my Johnson can't get erect or harden sadly.

one time i was trying to get it to erect by looking at porn. all i did was just critized the porn video in the comments section.

I get that impulse too.

Also, when I stand at my window or in any other tall location, where the fall is enough to certainly kill me, I get a strong desire to just jump.

I fapped a few times to this one bestiality doujin. That genre disgusts me, but something about this one, I don't know.

It pretty much gives me this feeling:

I like consensual sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of reproduction.

get……out

Once I puked in my bed and played with the puke.
And I remember that in detail.
The puke was red with some white spots in it.
Then I buried my face in it.

But shit, I was like 3 years old.

That's not really weird though. It's like a normal human thing to have random bad urges like self-harm or murder or whatever. Here's an article on the subject if you'd like to know more. There are plenty more out there.

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So, some more I guess.

- I said this in another thread but I practice seductive dancing almost daily
- I use my tongue and lips seductively as well
- I once saw bestiality stuff accidentally and I was horrifyingly aroused. I left fast.

If everyone is going to list how/what they fap to I might as well join in to.
- I rarely fap to pictures of actual women, because it feels like an invasion of their privacy to me. I don't have this issue with drawings though, mostly because drawings don't have feelings.
- With that being said, I am okay if I just look at pictures of girls I find cute or attractive, as long as I don't use them for fap material.
- I didn't start masturbating until I was turned down by this one girl when I was 18.

Cecaelia Girlie wrote:

Anyway, one day I got mucus on my hand I got this really strong urge to eat it… I had to hurry up and clean my hand so I didn’t.

I eat mucus all the time. I think it tastes pretty good. I don't eat it from my nose, but I will bring mucus up from the back of my throat, swirl it around a bit with my tongue, then swallow it. Yum.

I jerk off to this sign

So 90% of these are fap-related. As expected.

I once checked if I can bend far enough for my mouth to reach my dong, and I fucking can

I was looking for the bathroom.

I didn't start fapping 'till I was 16. Hrm, I also slept with my mom until I was in middle school. Was afraid to sleep on my own.

I have a huge weakness for cute things.

TMI time!

I'm scared of staircases because of that SCP story.

I pick my dandruff.

Sometimes i bite my hand. To release anger.

Lich wrote:

Hrm, I also slept with my mom until I was in middle school. Was afraid to sleep on my own.

I'll admit, I read that first sentence and freaked out a little bit.
…

Sorry…

Naw, I tried my best to word it so it didn't sound lewd. Ahaha.

Hrm, I also slept in the same bed as my mom until I was in middle school. Was afraid to sleep on my own.

There you go, you creepy bastard.

Yeah, that sounds much better!
Thank you, ahaha.

• I have a really bad foot fetish, so whenever a girl at my school has open toe shoes, I get distracted and just fantasize of playing with them, and sucking on their toes.
• I despise the Fat Acceptance movement, yet one of my favorite porn genres is BBW. Just the thought of doing one makes me extremely horny.
• I dream of having sex with many of the female teachers at my school.
• When I turn 18, before leaving for college, I plan on taking my sophomore Biology teacher on a date.
• I'm not a furry, but I do jerk off to Braixen and Renamon.
• I had an erection the entire time while writing this.

I had a dream of a certain KYM Moderator.

This has stopped being a TMI thread and started being a normal confession thread

C'mon guys you're supposed to admit disgustingly offensive things not just ordinary quirks

EXAMPLE: I just took a fat shit.

nothing in this thread is an ordinary quirk

an ordinary quirk would be like me saying i can't sit down and talk on the phone (which is true). talking about how you masturbate the same way serial killers do is definitely too much information for anyone but a psychiatrist or a government watchlist.

How is taking a shit – fat or otherwise – disgustingly offensive? It's literally something everyone does. Unless you did it in public or something…

Wierdass TMI: i get consumed with sweat every time i hear a gorrilaz song.

I forgot to put in that i like the music, that just happens when i listen to it.