My dear Memeses and Dankers, Advice Animals and Controversers, Fandoms, SJWs, GGers, Porn Galleries, Riffers, Raffers, and Riff-Raffers.
Yesterday was my first KYM birthday! I hope you are all enjoying yourselves as much as I am. I shall not keep you long. I have called you all together for a Purpose…
Indeed, for Three Purposes! First of all, to tell you that I am immensely fond of you all. Alas, one year is far too short a time to live among such excellent and admirable memers. I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.
Secondly, to celebrate my birthday. Cheers again. I should say: OUR birthday. For it is, of course, also the birthday of my heir and nephew, Space Cowboy. He comes of age and into his inheritance today.
Thirdly and finally, I wish to make an ANNOUNCEMENT.
I, uh, I h-have things to do.
I've put this off for far too long. I regret to announce -- this is The End. I am going now. I bid you all a very fond farewell.
[Puts on ring and disappears]
Hahahahaha! [flips ring, catches it and puts it in pocket]
Real talk
In light of recent events I just wanted to say I generally like all of you and you're pretty nice people. Sometimes some of you argue with each other and tell me about it and honestly most of the time I can see both sides.
None of you are the losers you may believe yourselves to be
Thanks & good night