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Anon plays World of Warcraft | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 50 minutes ago 2 REPLIES 626391773 >be 16 year old who just got his first car. Yes I was driving with no passenger, f--- you >still in my WoW phase. Warlords of Draenor just dropped. >looking at my phone while sitting in front of my house >think to myself >wouldn't it be cool if I shouted like a berserking orc >yell the most blood curdling roar my autistic ass has ever shouted in my entire life >look out from my window, across the street the guy with a filipina wife and 3 kids is staring at me. >say to myself, f--- him that roar was cool as s---. >we never made eye contact since that day >for the horde
Anonymous 50 minutes ago 2 REPLIES 626391773 >be 16 year old who just got his first car. Yes I was driving with no passenger, f--- you >still in my WoW phase. Warlords of Draenor just dropped. >looking at my phone while sitting in front of my house >think to myself >wouldn't it be cool if I shouted like a berserking orc >yell the most blood curdling roar my autistic ass has ever shouted in my entire life >look out from my window, across the street the guy with a filipina wife and 3 kids is staring at me. >say to myself, f--- him that roar was cool as s---. >we never made eye contact since that day >for the horde

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Anon contemplates the immoral | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/22/23(Wed)19:38:24 No.72333206 >be me >have a tard big boobie cousin (downie) >my parents and hers (uncle and aunt) are going to another city for a concert so they'll stay there from saturday to sunday >she's going to stay home with me So here's the thing 58 KB JPG >she's younger but of legal age >she has big bazongas >I dont wanna reach my thirties a virgin >she has big kahooeys, like ginormous >she's not that tarded so she probably knows what sex is >she has huge boioioingos >she probably wont ever get a chance to lose her virginity so may as well do her a favor help me out bros, lay the pros and cons for me. 8 Replies / 2 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 02/22/23(Wed)19:38:24 No.72333206 >be me >have a tard big boobie cousin (downie) >my parents and hers (uncle and aunt) are going to another city for a concert so they'll stay there from saturday to sunday >she's going to stay home with me So here's the thing 58 KB JPG >she's younger but of legal age >she has big bazongas >I dont wanna reach my thirties a virgin >she has big kahooeys, like ginormous >she's not that tarded so she probably knows what sex is >she has huge boioioingos >she probably wont ever get a chance to lose her virginity so may as well do her a favor help me out bros, lay the pros and cons for me. 8 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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Anon tries to loose weight | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 27 KB PNG 02/22/23(Wed) 23:53:44 No.70054397 I wish food wasn't a comfort to me. I wish I didn't eat that big burrito when I already ate 1500 calories today. I'm probably at 3k now. I hate that I have to eat, I wish I could never be hungry. 02/22/23(Wed) 23:54:41 No.70054406 : Anonymous >>70054382 # i self harm by going to the gym 02/22/23(Wed) 23:59:55 No.70054440 : Anonymous >>70047481 # >fast >"ooh, I'm hungry!" >eat shitload of carbs >guilty conscience >fast to correct your mistake >get hungry again very quickly because of all that glycogen If you don't eat protein, it will happen again.
: Anonymous 27 KB PNG 02/22/23(Wed) 23:53:44 No.70054397 I wish food wasn't a comfort to me. I wish I didn't eat that big burrito when I already ate 1500 calories today. I'm probably at 3k now. I hate that I have to eat, I wish I could never be hungry. 02/22/23(Wed) 23:54:41 No.70054406 : Anonymous >>70054382 # i self harm by going to the gym 02/22/23(Wed) 23:59:55 No.70054440 : Anonymous >>70047481 # >fast >"ooh, I'm hungry!" >eat shitload of carbs >guilty conscience >fast to correct your mistake >get hungry again very quickly because of all that glycogen If you don't eat protein, it will happen again.

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Anon decides to broaden his horizons | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.19 MB JPG 02/22/23(Wed)22:17:38 No.72334154 >25 year old college dropout >if I don't have kids by 30 ill be considered subhuman forever Should I just go for fat girls to speed up the process? : Anonymous >>72334154 (OP) # Nobody gives a s--- if you have kids by the time you're 30. Finding a fat girl that likes you is probably not a bad idea anyway though 02/22/23(Wed) 22:19:29 No.72334174 02/22/23(Wed) 22:22:13 No.72334206 : Anonymous Honestly fat girls arent bad
: Anonymous 1.19 MB JPG 02/22/23(Wed)22:17:38 No.72334154 >25 year old college dropout >if I don't have kids by 30 ill be considered subhuman forever Should I just go for fat girls to speed up the process? : Anonymous >>72334154 (OP) # Nobody gives a s--- if you have kids by the time you're 30. Finding a fat girl that likes you is probably not a bad idea anyway though 02/22/23(Wed) 22:19:29 No.72334174 02/22/23(Wed) 22:22:13 No.72334206 : Anonymous Honestly fat girls arent bad

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Anon's grandma is gullible | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/22/23 (Wed)19:49:57 No.72333321 >be me >eating at grandmas >grandma is always talking about b------- she believes from the internet >like how honey from african bees can cure diabetes or some s--- >she tries to tell me a life hack she found 5 KB JPG since she was young >according to her applying saliva to wounds help heal them so she always does that >just go along with it >she then tells me how she's been basically dropping loogies on all the food she cooks and explains to me that this is how even tho im big i havent had any heart issues anons i want to f------ shoot myself 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 02/22/23 (Wed)19:49:57 No.72333321 >be me >eating at grandmas >grandma is always talking about b------- she believes from the internet >like how honey from african bees can cure diabetes or some s--- >she tries to tell me a life hack she found 5 KB JPG since she was young >according to her applying saliva to wounds help heal them so she always does that >just go along with it >she then tells me how she's been basically dropping loogies on all the food she cooks and explains to me that this is how even tho im big i havent had any heart issues anons i want to f------ shoot myself 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon doesn’t like black people | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 443 KB PNG : Zen >>72331527 (OP) # what did you do that for? >>72331570 # : Anonymous 02/23/23(Thu)09:14:53 No.72331527 I publicly executed a black man today >>72331699 # 02/23/23(Thu)09:15:52 No.72331538 02/23/23(Thu)09:19:27 No.72331570 >>72331538 # He was behaving suspiciously
Anonymous 443 KB PNG : Zen >>72331527 (OP) # what did you do that for? >>72331570 # : Anonymous 02/23/23(Thu)09:14:53 No.72331527 I publicly executed a black man today >>72331699 # 02/23/23(Thu)09:15:52 No.72331538 02/23/23(Thu)09:19:27 No.72331570 >>72331538 # He was behaving suspiciously

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Pickletext | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >>642860186 (OP) # >work at liqour store >see obviously underage girls enter and rush to the back 09/23/15(Wed)22:56:01 No.642863132 >hear them whispering and discussing what to get >they grab heaven hill vodka >they try and check out and I ask for I'd >they "lost" it but one says her dad says its ok she's 22 >laugh at them and tell them gtfo >same girl tells me her dad is rich blah blah >they leave and I start eating a pickle in a bag >drive thru bell rings >walk over and see its the same girls >they freak out one says that there should have been someone else >I stare at them eating my pickle >they speed off >good pickle
: Anonymous >>642860186 (OP) # >work at liqour store >see obviously underage girls enter and rush to the back 09/23/15(Wed)22:56:01 No.642863132 >hear them whispering and discussing what to get >they grab heaven hill vodka >they try and check out and I ask for I'd >they "lost" it but one says her dad says its ok she's 22 >laugh at them and tell them gtfo >same girl tells me her dad is rich blah blah >they leave and I start eating a pickle in a bag >drive thru bell rings >walk over and see its the same girls >they freak out one says that there should have been someone else >I stare at them eating my pickle >they speed off >good pickle

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Anon has had enough. | /r/Greentext

02/23/23(Thu)11:22:16 No.72334208 >Cost of living increasing everywhere >Wages unable to keep up >one bedroom apartments run at over 1k even in poorer areas. >Homelessness very visibly increasing 140 KB PNG >Young adults unironically willing to live in pods How and why the f--- are normies so accepting of this? Why hasn't anyone revolted? Why are there no protests of this? How badly does society have to get financially r---- in order for people to finally say enough is enough? : Anonymous
02/23/23(Thu)11:22:16 No.72334208 >Cost of living increasing everywhere >Wages unable to keep up >one bedroom apartments run at over 1k even in poorer areas. >Homelessness very visibly increasing 140 KB PNG >Young adults unironically willing to live in pods How and why the f--- are normies so accepting of this? Why hasn't anyone revolted? Why are there no protests of this? How badly does society have to get financially r---- in order for people to finally say enough is enough? : Anonymous

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Anon has a goal | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 402 KB JPG 02/23/23(Thu)11:45:08 No.72332999 >didn't go to university >will never have a job or girlfriend i like >will never have a meaningful career or wife jesus f------ christ why am i alive 02/23/23(Thu)11:47:59 No.72333031 Anonymous To fondle your balls like they are beyblades
Anonymous 402 KB JPG 02/23/23(Thu)11:45:08 No.72332999 >didn't go to university >will never have a job or girlfriend i like >will never have a meaningful career or wife jesus f------ christ why am i alive 02/23/23(Thu)11:47:59 No.72333031 Anonymous To fondle your balls like they are beyblades

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Anon is not gay | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 26 KB JPG 02/23/23(Thu)11:41:23 No.72332971 >be me >friendless loser >older sister get bf >intimidating dude but alright >learn he likes vidya >start playing vidya together >yay i finally have friend >sister wants to talk >her bf came out as bi >wants to experiment >him and sister want it to be me >not gay but agree >i dont want to lose my only friend >now in weird relationship where he sleeps with both if us I just wanted a friend to play vidya with anons. Im not gay, how do i get out of this.
Anonymous 26 KB JPG 02/23/23(Thu)11:41:23 No.72332971 >be me >friendless loser >older sister get bf >intimidating dude but alright >learn he likes vidya >start playing vidya together >yay i finally have friend >sister wants to talk >her bf came out as bi >wants to experiment >him and sister want it to be me >not gay but agree >i dont want to lose my only friend >now in weird relationship where he sleeps with both if us I just wanted a friend to play vidya with anons. Im not gay, how do i get out of this.

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Anon hates his cat | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 90 KB JPG 02/23/23(Thu)00:03:39 No.72331123 >Gets in the litter box >Strategically positions himself to s--- on the floor while standing in the middle of the box >Afterwards, blasts jet of piss a meter away from the box >Spends ten minutes digging through the litter >Spends ten minutes trying to dig through the floor >Walks away with s--- dangling from his ass, specifically to drop it at the most unlikely place >Steps on the piss and immediately jumps onto a counter
Anonymous 90 KB JPG 02/23/23(Thu)00:03:39 No.72331123 >Gets in the litter box >Strategically positions himself to s--- on the floor while standing in the middle of the box >Afterwards, blasts jet of piss a meter away from the box >Spends ten minutes digging through the litter >Spends ten minutes trying to dig through the floor >Walks away with s--- dangling from his ass, specifically to drop it at the most unlikely place >Steps on the piss and immediately jumps onto a counter

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Anon's friend and his sister | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/23/23(Thu)07:28:44 No.894807953 >be 13 going to friend's house >he seems completely normal >we hang and play twisted metal till around midnight >friend randomly pauses game, turns and looks at me >"you ok lul?" >"hey anon, wanna see something cool? You can't tell anyone" >"sure" >>894808544 >this peaked my curiosity >"follow me" >friend leads me to his sister's room and tells me to go inside with him >his sister is 9, maybe 10 >she seems him and just let's out a comical "uh oh" >he jumps down on floor beside her, pulls her pants down and finger-blasts her ass, like a lot >he's going absolutely ham >she squirms and kicks a bit, then they laugh and he rushes back to his room >I follow, still in shock >"haha, wasn't that funny anon?" >"uhh, yeah" >we never speak of it again and I stopped associating with him >years later I see his sister at a party >look her in the eyes, the windows of her soul, and in a deadpan voice say "uh oh" >she chugs her drink and then runs to the opposite side of the property >I tell her that s--- was f----- up, and I end up finger-blasting her ass on the couch while she gave me head good times.
Anonymous 02/23/23(Thu)07:28:44 No.894807953 >be 13 going to friend's house >he seems completely normal >we hang and play twisted metal till around midnight >friend randomly pauses game, turns and looks at me >"you ok lul?" >"hey anon, wanna see something cool? You can't tell anyone" >"sure" >>894808544 >this peaked my curiosity >"follow me" >friend leads me to his sister's room and tells me to go inside with him >his sister is 9, maybe 10 >she seems him and just let's out a comical "uh oh" >he jumps down on floor beside her, pulls her pants down and finger-blasts her ass, like a lot >he's going absolutely ham >she squirms and kicks a bit, then they laugh and he rushes back to his room >I follow, still in shock >"haha, wasn't that funny anon?" >"uhh, yeah" >we never speak of it again and I stopped associating with him >years later I see his sister at a party >look her in the eyes, the windows of her soul, and in a deadpan voice say "uh oh" >she chugs her drink and then runs to the opposite side of the property >I tell her that s--- was f----- up, and I end up finger-blasting her ass on the couch while she gave me head good times.

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anon is told lies by his psychiatrist | /r/Greentext

33 KB PNG > Capitalism is NOT to blame for your issues > Political radicalism is NOT the answer > Revolution will NOT fix your problems > You ARE mentally ill > Your thoughts ARE the problem > Your resistance IS pathological > Therapy CAN fix all your problems
33 KB PNG > Capitalism is NOT to blame for your issues > Political radicalism is NOT the answer > Revolution will NOT fix your problems > You ARE mentally ill > Your thoughts ARE the problem > Your resistance IS pathological > Therapy CAN fix all your problems

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Maybe Baby | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I'll tell ya, I don't see GIF it happening 242 KB PNG 02/21/23(Tue)08:43:12 No.72315615 >Maybe I should get a job >Maybe I should go to the gym >Maybe I should actually do something with my life Nah, I'll just sit here and wallow in my own misery like everyone on this godforsaken site
: Anonymous I'll tell ya, I don't see GIF it happening 242 KB PNG 02/21/23(Tue)08:43:12 No.72315615 >Maybe I should get a job >Maybe I should go to the gym >Maybe I should actually do something with my life Nah, I'll just sit here and wallow in my own misery like everyone on this godforsaken site

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Anonette boymode fails


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Anon's girlfriend asked for a break | /r/Greentext

File: c7c (1).png (98 KB, 612x491) نے Anonymous 02/23/23(Thu)08:47:53 No.894811688 >Be me, have a gf of 5 years >Gf started asking when are we going to marry and trying to force me >Told her I'm not going to marry unless I'm ready >Told her she can wait or leave if she can't >Gf be upset >She called the next day she wants a break from the relationship >Asked her if she is sure >She is >Goes on a break >A day later, she called and said she is lonely and don't want a break anymore >Felt disrespected that my feeling isn't part of the consideration >Told her we should continue with the break >She got upset and said things like I don't want to talk to her >Told her that my feelings are important too >Gf be upset again??? >Haven't spoken to her since, it has been 3 days I think she might break up with me for real at this point, did I mess up anons?
File: c7c (1).png (98 KB, 612x491) نے Anonymous 02/23/23(Thu)08:47:53 No.894811688 >Be me, have a gf of 5 years >Gf started asking when are we going to marry and trying to force me >Told her I'm not going to marry unless I'm ready >Told her she can wait or leave if she can't >Gf be upset >She called the next day she wants a break from the relationship >Asked her if she is sure >She is >Goes on a break >A day later, she called and said she is lonely and don't want a break anymore >Felt disrespected that my feeling isn't part of the consideration >Told her we should continue with the break >She got upset and said things like I don't want to talk to her >Told her that my feelings are important too >Gf be upset again??? >Haven't spoken to her since, it has been 3 days I think she might break up with me for real at this point, did I mess up anons?

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Anonette gets job callback during voice training


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bimbofication in action


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Masculinity is fragile and must be protected


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Anon the Clown | /r/Greentext

File: pepe-peepo.gif (2.88 MB, 498x498) Anonymous 02/22/23(Wed)11:32:00 No.72325688 Why am I a f------ clown? > Have an important appointment to attend early in the morning. > Decide to go sleep with the clothes instead of pajamas to save time when I wake up. > Wake up and automatically remove my shirt. > Realize that's my shirt not pajama, so put it back on. > Automatically go put pants on. > Realize I'm already wearing pants. > See it's past 15 minutes the time, so I hurry up. > Automatically start to put sock on when I already have. > Realize, but this time I remove both socks of same foot. > Have to separate socks and put back on. > Get stressed already. > Wake up, realize that was a f------ dream. > It's past 20 minutes! > Go run to bus stop. > Realize I forgot to wear the daily clothes when I went to sleep.
File: pepe-peepo.gif (2.88 MB, 498x498) Anonymous 02/22/23(Wed)11:32:00 No.72325688 Why am I a f------ clown? > Have an important appointment to attend early in the morning. > Decide to go sleep with the clothes instead of pajamas to save time when I wake up. > Wake up and automatically remove my shirt. > Realize that's my shirt not pajama, so put it back on. > Automatically go put pants on. > Realize I'm already wearing pants. > See it's past 15 minutes the time, so I hurry up. > Automatically start to put sock on when I already have. > Realize, but this time I remove both socks of same foot. > Have to separate socks and put back on. > Get stressed already. > Wake up, realize that was a f------ dream. > It's past 20 minutes! > Go run to bus stop. > Realize I forgot to wear the daily clothes when I went to sleep.

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