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there are people born in 2010 here | /r/Greentext

55m (7/29 21:30). 171817799 33 Re 3 Img JPG · 57KB · (400 × 387) 10 Replies >there are zoomers on this board RIGHT NOW who've never seen Back to the Future 54m (7/29 21:31) · 171817848 2 Replies >>171817799 (OP) more like back to your rocking chair old man lmao ...
55m (7/29 21:30). 171817799 33 Re 3 Img JPG · 57KB · (400 × 387) 10 Replies >there are zoomers on this board RIGHT NOW who've never seen Back to the Future 54m (7/29 21:31) · 171817848 2 Replies >>171817799 (OP) more like back to your rocking chair old man lmao ...

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Anon's spider pet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 79 KB JPG 09/12/22(Mon)20:56:19 No.70185496 >be me >s------- one day at home >notice spider in gap under door frame >huh.jpg >spider bro just watchin me >alright then >finish s------- >come back for business next day >spider bro is there again >guess it's his home now >always peeks out from under when >s--- guardian watches over me for next two years >one day notice he's not there anymore >that's odd >don't see spider bro for weeks, >check under door frame >find his body >rip >you'll be missed my s------- buddy
: Anonymous 79 KB JPG 09/12/22(Mon)20:56:19 No.70185496 >be me >s------- one day at home >notice spider in gap under door frame >huh.jpg >spider bro just watchin me >alright then >finish s------- >come back for business next day >spider bro is there again >guess it's his home now >always peeks out from under when >s--- guardian watches over me for next two years >one day notice he's not there anymore >that's odd >don't see spider bro for weeks, >check under door frame >find his body >rip >you'll be missed my s------- buddy

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Anon’s friend is a cuck | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 115 KB JPG 03/13/22(Sun)20:26:44 No.874372800 >Be me >Two years ago >Friend has his first kid >Friend is white Worth it >Baby comes out black with nappy hair >Everyone is uncomfortable as it's obvious his wife cheated >People ignore it like king of the hill >He had a barbecue celebrating his first born" >Show up >Autism over 9000 >"Did you overcook that one?" >Punches me in the face
: Anonymous 115 KB JPG 03/13/22(Sun)20:26:44 No.874372800 >Be me >Two years ago >Friend has his first kid >Friend is white Worth it >Baby comes out black with nappy hair >Everyone is uncomfortable as it's obvious his wife cheated >People ignore it like king of the hill >He had a barbecue celebrating his first born" >Show up >Autism over 9000 >"Did you overcook that one?" >Punches me in the face

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anon's school trip story | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/10/21(Sun)08:18:32 No.65699292 91 KB JPG >In 8th grade on Washington D.C. school trip >At some monument >If you go to the bathroom you have to bring a partner so you don't get lost >Go to the bathroom with some guy >I get done in 30 seconds and wait for him to finish s------- >Been more than 5 minutes so I leave without him >Everyone is starting to board the bus to leave the monument >Get on the bus and the teacher is taking attendance >Say here for him when his name is called >Leave What are your field trip stories?
: Anonymous 10/10/21(Sun)08:18:32 No.65699292 91 KB JPG >In 8th grade on Washington D.C. school trip >At some monument >If you go to the bathroom you have to bring a partner so you don't get lost >Go to the bathroom with some guy >I get done in 30 seconds and wait for him to finish s------- >Been more than 5 minutes so I leave without him >Everyone is starting to board the bus to leave the monument >Get on the bus and the teacher is taking attendance >Say here for him when his name is called >Leave What are your field trip stories?

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Anon fumbles with the mommy-pill dosage | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 133 KB JPG 09/12/22(Mon)21:07:36 No.885511879 God damn it, /b/ >be 30 year old attractive male >relatively successful, making almost 6 figures >I hire mostly attractive people in their 40's and 50's because they help bring my furniture business the most money >49 year old absolute stunning milf accidentally farts by me >she gets really embarrassed so I wink and say "some guys like that" >I'm not that turned on by farts, only if I'm really into the f------ and its odorless, then it's kinda hot >the next day she let's the nastiest f----- ripper out by me and I can smell it in my clothes >she grins and I try to hide my disgust and smile and pretend I have matters to tend to >another hot employee gets suspiciously close to me when asking about her metrics and commissions >I start to notice it smells like s--- >she f----- unloaded a nasty silent fart >a third employee does it >mfw I hired all these milfs and now they just walk around smelling like s---
: Anonymous 133 KB JPG 09/12/22(Mon)21:07:36 No.885511879 God damn it, /b/ >be 30 year old attractive male >relatively successful, making almost 6 figures >I hire mostly attractive people in their 40's and 50's because they help bring my furniture business the most money >49 year old absolute stunning milf accidentally farts by me >she gets really embarrassed so I wink and say "some guys like that" >I'm not that turned on by farts, only if I'm really into the f------ and its odorless, then it's kinda hot >the next day she let's the nastiest f----- ripper out by me and I can smell it in my clothes >she grins and I try to hide my disgust and smile and pretend I have matters to tend to >another hot employee gets suspiciously close to me when asking about her metrics and commissions >I start to notice it smells like s--- >she f----- unloaded a nasty silent fart >a third employee does it >mfw I hired all these milfs and now they just walk around smelling like s---

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Anon with math | /r/Greentext

Anonymous The most important thing to ge(...) 124 KB JPG 09/11/22(Sun)07:37:11 No.14838777 Anonymous No one talks about this, but the most important thing to get better at math is: >exercising early in the morning >cold shower >lots of red meat and liver >sleep when you feel sleepy, wake up without alarm Ever since I started doing this, my brain fog completely disappeared, and I haven't had any reason to check the solution. I now feel like I can prove every theorem (and conjecture) in Analysis. 29 Replies 1 Image View Thread 09/11/22(Sun)14:50:17 No. 14839863 >>14839810 # Nope, art is hardest to nail. There is pretty much zero definition of what makes good art good art, and there is zero way of telling why you're good at art. Go to a math grad school, you will find plenty of people good at math, go to any prestigious art school, chances are you will find none. Art is pretty much like publishing a completely original and new math paper every time. Math is one of the least genetic skills, because all it requires is logical thinking which is a fundamental property of a sapient brain. The problem is most f--- never use their brain, but pretty much everyone who is interested in math is almost always good at math, or at least far better than average. This is literally the only filter there is for math: lack of interest. 99% of people who are interested in art suck at it.
Anonymous The most important thing to ge(...) 124 KB JPG 09/11/22(Sun)07:37:11 No.14838777 Anonymous No one talks about this, but the most important thing to get better at math is: >exercising early in the morning >cold shower >lots of red meat and liver >sleep when you feel sleepy, wake up without alarm Ever since I started doing this, my brain fog completely disappeared, and I haven't had any reason to check the solution. I now feel like I can prove every theorem (and conjecture) in Analysis. 29 Replies 1 Image View Thread 09/11/22(Sun)14:50:17 No. 14839863 >>14839810 # Nope, art is hardest to nail. There is pretty much zero definition of what makes good art good art, and there is zero way of telling why you're good at art. Go to a math grad school, you will find plenty of people good at math, go to any prestigious art school, chances are you will find none. Art is pretty much like publishing a completely original and new math paper every time. Math is one of the least genetic skills, because all it requires is logical thinking which is a fundamental property of a sapient brain. The problem is most f--- never use their brain, but pretty much everyone who is interested in math is almost always good at math, or at least far better than average. This is literally the only filter there is for math: lack of interest. 99% of people who are interested in art suck at it.

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Anon has poop salad | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Guys it's the end... >Yesterday mom cleans my room >Cleans more than ever before >Starts moving around my stuff >She finds the poop salad >Mfw Her and dad decided to kick me out... I'm 20btw. 211 KB JPG 03/08/21(Mon)03:56:35 No.62653679 4 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous Guys it's the end... >Yesterday mom cleans my room >Cleans more than ever before >Starts moving around my stuff >She finds the poop salad >Mfw Her and dad decided to kick me out... I'm 20btw. 211 KB JPG 03/08/21(Mon)03:56:35 No.62653679 4 Replies View Thread

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anon is pessimistic about the future | /r/Greentext

File: Mona Pissa.jpg (30 KB, 600x600) ☐ Anonymous 09/12/22(Mon)12:46:53 No.70182424 why cant any of the "good news" sources realize that showing the same story of a suicidal man becoming friends with the cop that saved him wont ever make up for the fact that the world is going to s---. I cant fathom how anyone can have hope in hummanity after seeing some photos of firemen saving puppies, and not realizing that at that same time, somewhere in africa they are frying dogs to survive droughts. Hummanity as a whole has gone to s---, there is no such thing as "undefeatable human spirit" there is only greed. while he media is talking about another f----- getting assaulted for being a f----- some kids in africa are starving to death because the journalists need their f------ double shot of espresso caramel latte. we live in a dystopia, f--- you. im killign myself the moment the tomfoolery of the west comes to bite it in the ass. I bet some redditfag and tiktok f-- are going to steal this for some reddit updoots and leve this sentecene cus "teeheehee meta" f--- you
File: Mona Pissa.jpg (30 KB, 600x600) ☐ Anonymous 09/12/22(Mon)12:46:53 No.70182424 why cant any of the "good news" sources realize that showing the same story of a suicidal man becoming friends with the cop that saved him wont ever make up for the fact that the world is going to s---. I cant fathom how anyone can have hope in hummanity after seeing some photos of firemen saving puppies, and not realizing that at that same time, somewhere in africa they are frying dogs to survive droughts. Hummanity as a whole has gone to s---, there is no such thing as "undefeatable human spirit" there is only greed. while he media is talking about another f----- getting assaulted for being a f----- some kids in africa are starving to death because the journalists need their f------ double shot of espresso caramel latte. we live in a dystopia, f--- you. im killign myself the moment the tomfoolery of the west comes to bite it in the ass. I bet some redditfag and tiktok f-- are going to steal this for some reddit updoots and leve this sentecene cus "teeheehee meta" f--- you

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Anon is Raymundo | /r/Greentext

File: 1662333241976924.jpg (102 KB, 555x1047) Take the Raymundo pill Anonymous 09/12/22(Mon)04:02:19 No.885499066 >be me, live near the beach >hate my life >no real passions or interests, just a pretty bland person >consider the rope heavily >in my depression, watch old cartoons from my childhood >rocketpower.mov >start trying to emulate raymundo >eat burgers and chili cheese fries, listen exclusively to ska and reggae >wear bucket hats, hang around the beach >suddenly life feels less s----- >still no actual personality, but starting to unironically like ska >maybe that's enough of a personality When did you decide it was time to take the Raymundo pill anons?
File: 1662333241976924.jpg (102 KB, 555x1047) Take the Raymundo pill Anonymous 09/12/22(Mon)04:02:19 No.885499066 >be me, live near the beach >hate my life >no real passions or interests, just a pretty bland person >consider the rope heavily >in my depression, watch old cartoons from my childhood >rocketpower.mov >start trying to emulate raymundo >eat burgers and chili cheese fries, listen exclusively to ska and reggae >wear bucket hats, hang around the beach >suddenly life feels less s----- >still no actual personality, but starting to unironically like ska >maybe that's enough of a personality When did you decide it was time to take the Raymundo pill anons?

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anon is a femboy | /r/Greentext

27 KB JPG be me swedish male > pic related
27 KB JPG be me swedish male > pic related

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Anon experiences an error in the matrix | /r/Greentext

File: 1623423462356.jpg (50 KB, 750x755) Anonymous 09/11/22(Sun)17:00:20 No.885436162 [Reply] ► >be me >want to take s--- >always remembered the good times of me feeling light after s------- >starts wondering how much weight I'll lose after taking said s--- >quickly stand on a scale before my ass busts >93.5 kg >"kk, now off to the s------" >-8 minutes later, after s------- a massive brick AND pissing >"Hoo boy, I must've lost a whole kilogram!" >stand on a scale >94.2 kg >mfw Pls explain to me how that happened. Is that an error in the matrix simulation? Am I supposed to file a bug report to the world gov?
File: 1623423462356.jpg (50 KB, 750x755) Anonymous 09/11/22(Sun)17:00:20 No.885436162 [Reply] ► >be me >want to take s--- >always remembered the good times of me feeling light after s------- >starts wondering how much weight I'll lose after taking said s--- >quickly stand on a scale before my ass busts >93.5 kg >"kk, now off to the s------" >-8 minutes later, after s------- a massive brick AND pissing >"Hoo boy, I must've lost a whole kilogram!" >stand on a scale >94.2 kg >mfw Pls explain to me how that happened. Is that an error in the matrix simulation? Am I supposed to file a bug report to the world gov?

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A near miss | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 35 KB JPG 09/12/22(Mon)07:38:29 No.70183496 >studying in school library >2 girls come up to me, Becky and Stacy (both average looking average popularity) >Becky tells me that Stacy has crush on me, while Stacy stands there looking nervous >Already know through a friend that Stacy has a bf, but they haven't made it public yet >Know it's some sort of trap >Know that I'm not supposed to know she has a bf >Not smart enough to think of a clever response >"Oh..." >they don't know what to say >they leave I consider it a victory
: Anonymous 35 KB JPG 09/12/22(Mon)07:38:29 No.70183496 >studying in school library >2 girls come up to me, Becky and Stacy (both average looking average popularity) >Becky tells me that Stacy has crush on me, while Stacy stands there looking nervous >Already know through a friend that Stacy has a bf, but they haven't made it public yet >Know it's some sort of trap >Know that I'm not supposed to know she has a bf >Not smart enough to think of a clever response >"Oh..." >they don't know what to say >they leave I consider it a victory

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Papa don't preach | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.19 MB PNG 09/12/22(Mon)05:37:45 No.70182704 >mom reads an article about incels and starts telling me about how evil the ideology is >tfw she doesn't know her son (me) is one of the founding fathers of the ideology 09/12/22(Mon) 05:39:34 No.70182715 : Anonymous The only context where you will ever be able to describe yourself as a father
: Anonymous 1.19 MB PNG 09/12/22(Mon)05:37:45 No.70182704 >mom reads an article about incels and starts telling me about how evil the ideology is >tfw she doesn't know her son (me) is one of the founding fathers of the ideology 09/12/22(Mon) 05:39:34 No.70182715 : Anonymous The only context where you will ever be able to describe yourself as a father

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Anon is Jewish | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 6 KB JPG 09/12/22(Mon)07:43:41 No.885504096 >Be me. Jew >Going to work at the Jew Bank like normal >A couple of rowdy punks start to follow me and calling me names like Christ Killer >One of them throws a rock >I start to run and turn down an alley >They catch me. I try to defend myself with the ancient Jewish martial of bribery >They refuse my shekels > I try to fight them off, but they knock me unconscious >Later I feel rough wood. My body is bouncing >I wake up. I am in a forest, in the back of a cart >"You we're trying to cross the border weren't you >I look around, the gate to a concentration camp is at the end of the road >You got me again Oberstormbahnfuhrer Todd Johnson
Anonymous 6 KB JPG 09/12/22(Mon)07:43:41 No.885504096 >Be me. Jew >Going to work at the Jew Bank like normal >A couple of rowdy punks start to follow me and calling me names like Christ Killer >One of them throws a rock >I start to run and turn down an alley >They catch me. I try to defend myself with the ancient Jewish martial of bribery >They refuse my shekels > I try to fight them off, but they knock me unconscious >Later I feel rough wood. My body is bouncing >I wake up. I am in a forest, in the back of a cart >"You we're trying to cross the border weren't you >I look around, the gate to a concentration camp is at the end of the road >You got me again Oberstormbahnfuhrer Todd Johnson

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Anon observes an Italian tradition | /r/Greentext

File: 1661379392088920.png (66 KB, 600x529) UNA Anonymous 09/11/22(Sun)16:33:05 No.170721741 ► >>170721867 >is that... a construction site??? >MAMMA MIA!!! LUIGI, ALESSANDRO, MATTEO, ENZO, GIORGIO, CANCEL YOUR PLANS FOR THIS WEEK WE'RE GONNA WATCH SOME WORKSITE KINO
File: 1661379392088920.png (66 KB, 600x529) UNA Anonymous 09/11/22(Sun)16:33:05 No.170721741 ► >>170721867 >is that... a construction site??? >MAMMA MIA!!! LUIGI, ALESSANDRO, MATTEO, ENZO, GIORGIO, CANCEL YOUR PLANS FOR THIS WEEK WE'RE GONNA WATCH SOME WORKSITE KINO

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Anon gets his content stolen | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 7 KB JPG 07/13/18(Fri)01:14:01 No.774184761 >be me >not a reddit user >love 4chan greentext, post almost everyday >go to check reddit greentext for s---- and giggles >I recognize one of them >it's a greentext I posted not 30 minutes earlier on 4chan >mfw he got 1k upvotes from my content >mfw reddit users steal my greentexts and there's nothing I can do about it >mfw this one is gonna get stolen too
: Anonymous 7 KB JPG 07/13/18(Fri)01:14:01 No.774184761 >be me >not a reddit user >love 4chan greentext, post almost everyday >go to check reddit greentext for s---- and giggles >I recognize one of them >it's a greentext I posted not 30 minutes earlier on 4chan >mfw he got 1k upvotes from my content >mfw reddit users steal my greentexts and there's nothing I can do about it >mfw this one is gonna get stolen too

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anon is struggling | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/11/22(Sun)19:30:11 No.885486954 CCF791F0-832C-4ACB-94F5-1 FA0B11CAABC.jpg 47 KB JPG >be me >finally buy ps5 >setup.mov >log in to psn >one week temp ban i know god hates f--- but just let me have something for once please
Anonymous 09/11/22(Sun)19:30:11 No.885486954 CCF791F0-832C-4ACB-94F5-1 FA0B11CAABC.jpg 47 KB JPG >be me >finally buy ps5 >setup.mov >log in to psn >one week temp ban i know god hates f--- but just let me have something for once please

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Anon tries manufactured consent | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 密です。 ソーシャルディスタンスで、 201 KB JPG 10/24/21(Sun)09:52:07 No.65881340 >do an experiment >make a thread >reply to my own post with negative replies >other replies are all negative >make a new thread but the same >again reply but this time with neutral/positive comments >replies are more civil conclusion the first post sets the tone of the discussion and you can easily manipulate other anons into doing what you want
: Anonymous 密です。 ソーシャルディスタンスで、 201 KB JPG 10/24/21(Sun)09:52:07 No.65881340 >do an experiment >make a thread >reply to my own post with negative replies >other replies are all negative >make a new thread but the same >again reply but this time with neutral/positive comments >replies are more civil conclusion the first post sets the tone of the discussion and you can easily manipulate other anons into doing what you want

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Anon finds jesus | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 87 KB JPG 09/12/22 (Mon)07:23:19 No.32855864 >be me >find Jesus >try to repent and turn away from sin and change my ways >stop using bad words >deny and repent when lust, temptation, or bad thoughts come around >still most concerned about my trans thoughts Why are these thoughts and temptations so rough Christ bros? 61 Replies /19 Images View Thread
Anonymous 87 KB JPG 09/12/22 (Mon)07:23:19 No.32855864 >be me >find Jesus >try to repent and turn away from sin and change my ways >stop using bad words >deny and repent when lust, temptation, or bad thoughts come around >still most concerned about my trans thoughts Why are these thoughts and temptations so rough Christ bros? 61 Replies /19 Images View Thread

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Anon has had enough of this shit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 156 KB JPG 09/12/22 (Mon)04:01:57 No.885499060 >be me working at target >soul ground to dust in retail hell >get to work that morning, people already talking about "that guy" being there >some nerd who comes in when he sees new funko pops in stock online so he can get some super special edition recolored one >told about how he bothers the electronics person to go find the box in inventory before it's even properly marked for flow >I'm the electronics person >tell him I have no way of finding it, it's here yes but it could be hours or days until it's stocked >says he'll wait >literally waits at the electronics island >brags about how he's going to buy the special edition to resell it >won't stop talking about funkos, bothering customers, and asking me to look in the back >tell him to chill, he gets a manager >manager tells me to try and find it in the back >can't find it >tell him I can't find it >"I'll wait" >fast forward to me getting back from lunch >he bugs a different manager till they ask me to try again >actually find it about 30 minutes later >surprisedpikachu.jpeg >see the special edition one is transparent >look them up online >this piece of s----- plastic is going for $200+ on eBay >f--- this annoying prick, I'M buying the special edition >take the transparent one and leave it in the shipping box, but take the display with the rest of them out to him >tell him I found them >he asks where the special edition is >say I don't know >he's p----- and gets the manager again >she asks me what happened, say that's how I found them >she says she'll have to check the cameras while he waits >fuuuuuck >whatever this job f------ blows, fully expecting to get fired >she comes back >says she can't tell what happened from the angle, but she's watching inventory and will be able to see who buys it >he seethes and asks to file a complaint >realize there's no way I can buy it now >later that day I throw that bitch in the bailer and listen as it's smashed to pieces
: Anonymous 156 KB JPG 09/12/22 (Mon)04:01:57 No.885499060 >be me working at target >soul ground to dust in retail hell >get to work that morning, people already talking about "that guy" being there >some nerd who comes in when he sees new funko pops in stock online so he can get some super special edition recolored one >told about how he bothers the electronics person to go find the box in inventory before it's even properly marked for flow >I'm the electronics person >tell him I have no way of finding it, it's here yes but it could be hours or days until it's stocked >says he'll wait >literally waits at the electronics island >brags about how he's going to buy the special edition to resell it >won't stop talking about funkos, bothering customers, and asking me to look in the back >tell him to chill, he gets a manager >manager tells me to try and find it in the back >can't find it >tell him I can't find it >"I'll wait" >fast forward to me getting back from lunch >he bugs a different manager till they ask me to try again >actually find it about 30 minutes later >surprisedpikachu.jpeg >see the special edition one is transparent >look them up online >this piece of s----- plastic is going for $200+ on eBay >f--- this annoying prick, I'M buying the special edition >take the transparent one and leave it in the shipping box, but take the display with the rest of them out to him >tell him I found them >he asks where the special edition is >say I don't know >he's p----- and gets the manager again >she asks me what happened, say that's how I found them >she says she'll have to check the cameras while he waits >fuuuuuck >whatever this job f------ blows, fully expecting to get fired >she comes back >says she can't tell what happened from the angle, but she's watching inventory and will be able to see who buys it >he seethes and asks to file a complaint >realize there's no way I can buy it now >later that day I throw that bitch in the bailer and listen as it's smashed to pieces

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