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Universal Dreams

IVE BEEN OUT OF 5CHOOL FOR ITHINK THAT'S ONE OF THOSE YEARS, BUT I STL GET THOSEWEIRD UNIVERSAL DREAMS DREAMS UHERE I HAVE AN EXAM ANDI DIONT PREPARE OR DISCOVERING ROoMS IN YOUR LIKE FORGETTING YOUR CLOTHES, HOUSE YOU DIDNTKNOW ABOUT YEAH! OR WHEN YOURE HAVING OR THOSE ONES WHERE YOURE A NORMTAL DREAM, BUT THENA TALKING TO S0MEONE AND THEY HORSE APPEARS ON A DISTANT START REPEATING A LATITUDE AND HILLTOP, AND MEANS THE | | LONGITUDEOER AND OVER AND DREAM IS ABOUT TO TURN BADTHEN YOU WAKE UP THAT MORNING I...WHAT? THERE'S AN EARTHQUAKE THERE. HAHA DREAn9, RIGHT? SO WEIRD! HAVE THAT ONE LKE EVERY NIGHT.

IVE BEEN OUT OF 5CHOOL FOR ITHINK THAT'S ONE OF THOSE YEARS, BUT I STL GET THOSEWEIRD UNIVERSAL DREAMS DREAMS UHERE I HAVE AN EXAM ANDI DIONT PREPARE OR DISCOVERING ROoMS IN YOUR LIKE FORGETTING YOUR CLOTHES, HOUSE YOU DIDNTKNOW ABOUT YEAH! OR WHEN YOURE HAVING OR THOSE ONES WHERE YOURE A NORMTAL DREAM, BUT THENA TALKING TO S0MEONE AND THEY HORSE APPEARS ON A DISTANT START REPEATING A LATITUDE AND HILLTOP, AND MEANS THE | | LONGITUDEOER AND OVER AND DREAM IS ABOUT TO TURN BADTHEN YOU WAKE UP THAT MORNING I...WHAT? THERE'S AN EARTHQUAKE THERE. HAHA DREAn9, RIGHT? SO WEIRD! HAVE THAT ONE LKE EVERY NIGHT.

universal dreams

Memorable Quotes

LOOKINNG FOR A QUOTE FOR SOMETHING? HERE ARE SOME FOR GENERAL USE. THEY CAN BE ATTRIBUTED TO XKCD OR RANDALL MUNROE AS NEEDED I DISAGREE STRONGLY WITH WHATEVER WORK THIS QUOTE IS ATTACHED TO. THIS QUOTE WAS TAKEN OUT OF CONTEXT THIS QUOTE IS OFTEN FALSELY ATTRIBUTED TO MARK TWAIN IM BEING QUOTED TO INTRODUCE SOMETHING, BUT IHAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT 1S AND CERTAINLY DONT ENDORSE IT." THIS QUOTE IS VERY MEMORABLE I WROTE THIS BOOK, AND THE PERSON QUOTING ME HERE 1S TAKING CREDIT FOR IT THIS ENTIRE THING 15 THE QUOTE, NOT JUST THE PART IN QUOTE MARKS" (QUOTE MARKS, BRACKET5 AND EDITORS NOTE ARE ALL IN THE ORIGINAL.-ED] "JEBSITES THAT COLLECT QUOTES ARE FULL OF MISTAKES AND NEVER CHECK ORIGINAL SOURCES THIS GUOTE WILL BE THE ONLY PART OF THIS PRESENTATION YOU REMEMBER 000H, LOOK AT ME, I LOOKED UP A QUOTE! "IF YOURE DOING ATEXT SEARCH IN THIS DOCUMENT ITS HERE, BUT THE BAD NEWS 1S THAT IT ONY FOR THE WORD ぢTHE GOOD NEWS IS APPEARS IN THIS UNRELATED QUOTE "LJAIT, WHAT IF THESE QUOTE MARKS ARE INSIDE OUT 50 EVERYTHING IN THE REST OF THE DOCUMENT IS THE QUOTATION AND THIS PART ISN'T? DUUUUUDE "THE EDITORS OF BARTLETTS FAMILIAR QUOTATIONS ARE A BUNCH OF COWARDS WHO DON'T HAVE THE GUTS TO PRINT THIS. "THIS QUOTE ONLY LOOKS IN A SCRIPT FONT OVER A SUNSET. FOUND 내EN ITS "I DON'T DO A LOT OF PUBLIC SPEAKING S0 I LOOKED UP A MEMORABLE QUOTE TO START MY SPEECH, AND THIS 1S WHAT I FOUND. OK, YOURE STARING AT ME BLANKLY BUT THIS WHOLE THING IS A QUOTE. I KNOU THAT SOUNDS CONFUSING BUT... YOU KNOW WHAT NEVER MIND. "SENT FROM MY 1PHONE"

LOOKINNG FOR A QUOTE FOR SOMETHING? HERE ARE SOME FOR GENERAL USE. THEY CAN BE ATTRIBUTED TO XKCD OR RANDALL MUNROE AS NEEDED I DISAGREE STRONGLY WITH WHATEVER WORK THIS QUOTE IS ATTACHED TO. THIS QUOTE WAS TAKEN OUT OF CONTEXT THIS QUOTE IS OFTEN FALSELY ATTRIBUTED TO MARK TWAIN IM BEING QUOTED TO INTRODUCE SOMETHING, BUT IHAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT 1S AND CERTAINLY DONT ENDORSE IT." THIS QUOTE IS VERY MEMORABLE I WROTE THIS BOOK, AND THE PERSON QUOTING ME HERE 1S TAKING CREDIT FOR IT THIS ENTIRE THING 15 THE QUOTE, NOT JUST THE PART IN QUOTE MARKS" (QUOTE MARKS, BRACKET5 AND EDITORS NOTE ARE ALL IN THE ORIGINAL.-ED] "JEBSITES THAT COLLECT QUOTES ARE FULL OF MISTAKES AND NEVER CHECK ORIGINAL SOURCES THIS GUOTE WILL BE THE ONLY PART OF THIS PRESENTATION YOU REMEMBER 000H, LOOK AT ME, I LOOKED UP A QUOTE! "IF YOURE DOING ATEXT SEARCH IN THIS DOCUMENT ITS HERE, BUT THE BAD NEWS 1S THAT IT ONY FOR THE WORD ぢTHE GOOD NEWS IS APPEARS IN THIS UNRELATED QUOTE "LJAIT, WHAT IF THESE QUOTE MARKS ARE INSIDE OUT 50 EVERYTHING IN THE REST OF THE DOCUMENT IS THE QUOTATION AND THIS PART ISN'T? DUUUUUDE "THE EDITORS OF BARTLETTS FAMILIAR QUOTATIONS ARE A BUNCH OF COWARDS WHO DON'T HAVE THE GUTS TO PRINT THIS. "THIS QUOTE ONLY LOOKS IN A SCRIPT FONT OVER A SUNSET. FOUND 내EN ITS "I DON'T DO A LOT OF PUBLIC SPEAKING S0 I LOOKED UP A MEMORABLE QUOTE TO START MY SPEECH, AND THIS 1S WHAT I FOUND. OK, YOURE STARING AT ME BLANKLY BUT THIS WHOLE THING IS A QUOTE. I KNOU THAT SOUNDS CONFUSING BUT... YOU KNOW WHAT NEVER MIND. "SENT FROM MY 1PHONE"

memorable quotes

Dying Gift

AND TO YOU... I LEAVE THE 30-FOOT FOUCAULT PENDULUM FROM THE MAIN HALL IT HAS BEEN SWINGING FOR FIFTY YEPRS. AS LONG AS YOU REMEMBER ME, YOU MUST NEVER LET IT STOP! A FUN PRANK: AS YOU'RE DYING LEAVE PEOPLE GIFTS THAT WILL BE AS DIFFICULT A5 POSSIBLE TO PUT INTO STORAGE.

AND TO YOU... I LEAVE THE 30-FOOT FOUCAULT PENDULUM FROM THE MAIN HALL IT HAS BEEN SWINGING FOR FIFTY YEPRS. AS LONG AS YOU REMEMBER ME, YOU MUST NEVER LET IT STOP! A FUN PRANK: AS YOU'RE DYING LEAVE PEOPLE GIFTS THAT WILL BE AS DIFFICULT A5 POSSIBLE TO PUT INTO STORAGE.

The Food Size Cycle

THE FOOD S12E CYCLE FOOD ITEMM SIZE TIME IINITIAL NORMAL-SIZED FOOD (SANDWICH, BURGER I BURRITO, TACO, ETC) FOOD BECOrMES MORE POPULAR SIZE ARMS RACE VERAGE ITEM GROW5 AS RESTAURANTS COMPETE TO OFFER THE LARGEST VERSION TO HUNGRY CUSTOMERS VOID FOOD GETS TOO LARGE TO EAT NEJ FORMAT APPEARS AND FILLS THE VOID (PANINI, BURRITO BOL, I TAQUITO, SUDER, ETC) MERGER OR REPLACEMENT

THE FOOD S12E CYCLE FOOD ITEMM SIZE TIME IINITIAL NORMAL-SIZED FOOD (SANDWICH, BURGER I BURRITO, TACO, ETC) FOOD BECOrMES MORE POPULAR SIZE ARMS RACE VERAGE ITEM GROW5 AS RESTAURANTS COMPETE TO OFFER THE LARGEST VERSION TO HUNGRY CUSTOMERS VOID FOOD GETS TOO LARGE TO EAT NEJ FORMAT APPEARS AND FILLS THE VOID (PANINI, BURRITO BOL, I TAQUITO, SUDER, ETC) MERGER OR REPLACEMENT

the food size cycle

2016 Election Map

2016 ELECTION MAP EACH FIGURE REPRESENTS 250,000 VOTES TRUMP CLINTON OTHER OTES ARE DISTRIBUTED BY STAITE AS ACCURATELY AS PO55BLE 나ILE KEEPING NATIONAL TOTALS OAECr LOCATION WITHIN EACH STATE I5 APPROKIMATE

2016 ELECTION MAP EACH FIGURE REPRESENTS 250,000 VOTES TRUMP CLINTON OTHER OTES ARE DISTRIBUTED BY STAITE AS ACCURATELY AS PO55BLE 나ILE KEEPING NATIONAL TOTALS OAECr LOCATION WITHIN EACH STATE I5 APPROKIMATE

2016 election map

Meltdown and Spectre

THE MELTDOUNAND SPECTRE EXPLOITS USE "SPECULATIVE EEOTON?" WHAT'S THAT? THE PHANTOM TROLLEY ISN'T SUPPOSED TO TOUCH ANYONE, BUT IT TURNS OUT YOU CAN YOU KNOU THE TROLLEY PROBLEM? WELL, FOR A HILE NOU CPUs HAVE BASICALLY6TLL USE IT To DO STUFF AND IT CAN DRIVE BEEN SENDING TROUENS DOWN BOW PATHS, GUANTUM-STYLE, WHILE AWAITING THROUGH WALLS. YOUR CHOICE. THEN THE UNNEEDED "PHANTOMT TROLLEY DISAPPEARS. THAT SOUNDS BAD UHATS THAT? SO YOURE SAYING IF YOU TOGGLE A ROU OF MEIORY THE CLOUD IS FULL OF HONESTL IVE BEENCELL5 ON AND OFF REALLY FAST YOU PHANTOM TROLLEYSs ASSUMING WE UERECAN USE ELECTRICAL INTERFERENCE ARMED WITH HAMMERS DOOMED EVER SINCE TO FLIP NEARBY BITS AND I LEARNED ABOUT YES. THAT IS EXACTY RIGHT. ROCHAMMER, I DO UE JUST SUCK AT..COMPUTERS? OKAY. Tu,U. INSTALL UPDATES YUP ESPECIALY SHARED ONES. GOOD IDEA Fi

THE MELTDOUNAND SPECTRE EXPLOITS USE "SPECULATIVE EEOTON?" WHAT'S THAT? THE PHANTOM TROLLEY ISN'T SUPPOSED TO TOUCH ANYONE, BUT IT TURNS OUT YOU CAN YOU KNOU THE TROLLEY PROBLEM? WELL, FOR A HILE NOU CPUs HAVE BASICALLY6TLL USE IT To DO STUFF AND IT CAN DRIVE BEEN SENDING TROUENS DOWN BOW PATHS, GUANTUM-STYLE, WHILE AWAITING THROUGH WALLS. YOUR CHOICE. THEN THE UNNEEDED "PHANTOMT TROLLEY DISAPPEARS. THAT SOUNDS BAD UHATS THAT? SO YOURE SAYING IF YOU TOGGLE A ROU OF MEIORY THE CLOUD IS FULL OF HONESTL IVE BEENCELL5 ON AND OFF REALLY FAST YOU PHANTOM TROLLEYSs ASSUMING WE UERECAN USE ELECTRICAL INTERFERENCE ARMED WITH HAMMERS DOOMED EVER SINCE TO FLIP NEARBY BITS AND I LEARNED ABOUT YES. THAT IS EXACTY RIGHT. ROCHAMMER, I DO UE JUST SUCK AT..COMPUTERS? OKAY. Tu,U. INSTALL UPDATES YUP ESPECIALY SHARED ONES. GOOD IDEA Fi

meltdown and spectre

IATA Airport Abbreviations

CONFUSED BY THOSE AIRPORT IM FLYING INTO ELUR TONIGHT ABBREMATIONS USED BY YOURHEN DT ToMORRO FRIENDS WHO FLYA LOT? JUST MEMIORIZE THIS LIST! WITHOUT GOOGUING TMI TURKMIENISTAN INTERNATIONAL EWR EDLWARDS AIR FORCE BASE KUL KINGDOM OF LOATHING MIA COLOMBO SRI LANKA FFS FLAGSTAFF STATION SAN SAN ANTONIO DWI DELAWARE INTERNATIONAL MDW MIDWAY ATOLL SEA INDICATES WATER LANDING

CONFUSED BY THOSE AIRPORT IM FLYING INTO ELUR TONIGHT ABBREMATIONS USED BY YOURHEN DT ToMORRO FRIENDS WHO FLYA LOT? JUST MEMIORIZE THIS LIST! WITHOUT GOOGUING TMI TURKMIENISTAN INTERNATIONAL EWR EDLWARDS AIR FORCE BASE KUL KINGDOM OF LOATHING MIA COLOMBO SRI LANKA FFS FLAGSTAFF STATION SAN SAN ANTONIO DWI DELAWARE INTERNATIONAL MDW MIDWAY ATOLL SEA INDICATES WATER LANDING

iata airport abbreviations

App

WANT TO SITAN INCOMPLETE VERSION OF OUR WEBSITE WHERE YOU CPWT Z00M? DOUNLOAD OUR APP! OK NO BUT ASK ME AGAIN EVERY TME

WANT TO SITAN INCOMPLETE VERSION OF OUR WEBSITE WHERE YOU CPWT Z00M? DOUNLOAD OUR APP! OK NO BUT ASK ME AGAIN EVERY TME

mobile site app xkcd

How to make friends

LANT TO GO EAT FooD TOGETHER? JE COULD ALSO SIT TOGETHER AND TALK WITHOUT EATING. I DON'T NEED DEAT工MEAN, I DO NEED TO EAT BUT IF YOU DONT UANT To EAT WE CAN JUST TALK. ICANEAT LATER. Presenting Oka HOw TO MAKE FRIENDS IT TURNS OUT I STILL HAVENT FIGURED OUT HOW TO DO THIS. Sorry

LANT TO GO EAT FooD TOGETHER? JE COULD ALSO SIT TOGETHER AND TALK WITHOUT EATING. I DON'T NEED DEAT工MEAN, I DO NEED TO EAT BUT IF YOU DONT UANT To EAT WE CAN JUST TALK. ICANEAT LATER. Presenting Oka HOw TO MAKE FRIENDS IT TURNS OUT I STILL HAVENT FIGURED OUT HOW TO DO THIS. Sorry

xkcd how to make friends

Defensive Profile

xkcd free speech twitter

Digital Data

THE GREAT THING ABOUTHARD DRIVES FAIL, FLM DEGRADES PANT DIGITAL DATA ISTHATo COURSE, BUT THER CRACkS BUT A COPY OFA IT NEVER DEGRADES. BITS CAN BE COPIED CENTURY OLD DATA FILEE ARE IFIE FIROT FOREVER LUITHOUT LOSS.IDENTICAL TOTHEORIGINAL AMAZN egr 9GAE

THE GREAT THING ABOUTHARD DRIVES FAIL, FLM DEGRADES PANT DIGITAL DATA ISTHATo COURSE, BUT THER CRACkS BUT A COPY OFA IT NEVER DEGRADES. BITS CAN BE COPIED CENTURY OLD DATA FILEE ARE IFIE FIROT FOREVER LUITHOUT LOSS.IDENTICAL TOTHEORIGINAL AMAZN egr 9GAE

9gag watermark jpeg data degredation copy copying water-mark water mark permenant record cueball verizon lte screenshot

just imagine

NEXT TOP SCORE LEVEL OI HELL

NEXT TOP SCORE LEVEL OI HELL

video game logic tetris hell

U smrt

ID UKE TO BESTOW UPON YOU THE FIRST ANNUAL AWARDR EXCELLENCE IN BENG VERYSMART MAY YOU CONTINUE TO GRACE OUR INTERNET UITH YOUR WISDOM

ID UKE TO BESTOW UPON YOU THE FIRST ANNUAL AWARDR EXCELLENCE IN BENG VERYSMART MAY YOU CONTINUE TO GRACE OUR INTERNET UITH YOUR WISDOM

reaction:sarcasm xkcd smart

Purity

FIELDS ARRANGED BY PURITY MORE PURE SOCIOLOGY IS TUST APRED PSYCHOLOGY PSYCHOLOGY IS JUST APPLIED BIOLOGY. BIOLOGY IS JUST APPLIED CHEMISTRY WHICH IS JUST APPLIED PHYSCS. ITS NICE TO BE ON TOR OH, HEY,工DIDNT SEE YOU GUYS ALL THE WAY OVER THERE SocioLoGIST5 PSYCHOLOGISTS BIOLOGISTS CHEMIST5 PHYSICISTS MATHEMATICIANS

FIELDS ARRANGED BY PURITY MORE PURE SOCIOLOGY IS TUST APRED PSYCHOLOGY PSYCHOLOGY IS JUST APPLIED BIOLOGY. BIOLOGY IS JUST APPLIED CHEMISTRY WHICH IS JUST APPLIED PHYSCS. ITS NICE TO BE ON TOR OH, HEY,工DIDNT SEE YOU GUYS ALL THE WAY OVER THERE SocioLoGIST5 PSYCHOLOGISTS BIOLOGISTS CHEMIST5 PHYSICISTS MATHEMATICIANS

purity xkcd mathematicians physics science fields

Diode

WE NEED OKAY BUT FIRST YOU HURT YoU EMBARRASSEDIMSORRY. TO TALK. HOLD THE END MY FEEUNGS ME WITH MY FAMILY OF THIS DIODE. YESTERDAY. LAST WEEKEND.

WE NEED OKAY BUT FIRST YOU HURT YoU EMBARRASSEDIMSORRY. TO TALK. HOLD THE END MY FEEUNGS ME WITH MY FAMILY OF THIS DIODE. YESTERDAY. LAST WEEKEND.

Consecutive Vowels

WAS RUNNING A FACTOR ANALYSIS ON THIS HUGE DATABASE, AND CHECK OUT WHAT IT FOUND: HUH? THIS CHART MAKES NO SENSE, WHAT- 1 凡CKM NQh. QUEUEING" SEXUAL AROUSAL CONSECUTIVE VOWELS

WAS RUNNING A FACTOR ANALYSIS ON THIS HUGE DATABASE, AND CHECK OUT WHAT IT FOUND: HUH? THIS CHART MAKES NO SENSE, WHAT- 1 凡CKM NQh. QUEUEING" SEXUAL AROUSAL CONSECUTIVE VOWELS

vowels xkcd sexual

CIA

WHAT PEOPLE HEAR: WHAT MATER EXPERTS HEAR: HACKERS BRIEFLY TOOK DOWN THE WEBSITE OFSOMEONE HACKED THE CIA YESTERDAY... INTO THE CoMPUTERS SoMEONE TORE DOW OF THE CIA! A POSTER HUNG UP BY THE CIA!!

WHAT PEOPLE HEAR: WHAT MATER EXPERTS HEAR: HACKERS BRIEFLY TOOK DOWN THE WEBSITE OFSOMEONE HACKED THE CIA YESTERDAY... INTO THE CoMPUTERS SoMEONE TORE DOW OF THE CIA! A POSTER HUNG UP BY THE CIA!!

hackers cia xkcd

Airport Security

BUT IF YOU'RE WORRIED ABOUT BoMBS, WHY ARE YOU LETTING ME KEEP MY LAPTOP BATTERIES? IF I OVERVOLTED THEM AND BREACHED THE CELS, IT WOULD MAKE A SIZEABE EXPLOSION. OH GOD. ITS OKAY DEAR. IN AMOMENT HEL REALIZE I HAVE A GOOD POINT AND RETURN MMY WATER.

BUT IF YOU'RE WORRIED ABOUT BoMBS, WHY ARE YOU LETTING ME KEEP MY LAPTOP BATTERIES? IF I OVERVOLTED THEM AND BREACHED THE CELS, IT WOULD MAKE A SIZEABE EXPLOSION. OH GOD. ITS OKAY DEAR. IN AMOMENT HEL REALIZE I HAVE A GOOD POINT AND RETURN MMY WATER.

NASA

THE SIX WORDS YOU NEVER SAY AT NASA: AND BESIDES Proposal IT WORKS IN KERBAL SPACE PROGRAM. Oberth Koper

THE SIX WORDS YOU NEVER SAY AT NASA: AND BESIDES Proposal IT WORKS IN KERBAL SPACE PROGRAM. Oberth Koper

xkcd nasa kerbal space program ksp

Manuals

SOLVE PROBLEMS . CREATE PROBLEMS TOOLS THAT TOOLS THAT TOOLS THAT NEED TOOLS WHOSE MANUAL DONT NEED NEEDA A MANUAL BUT A MANUAL MANUAL DON'T HAVE ONE STARTS WITH HOW To READ THIS MANUAL

SOLVE PROBLEMS . CREATE PROBLEMS TOOLS THAT TOOLS THAT TOOLS THAT NEED TOOLS WHOSE MANUAL DONT NEED NEEDA A MANUAL BUT A MANUAL MANUAL DON'T HAVE ONE STARTS WITH HOW To READ THIS MANUAL

xkcd manuals problems chart