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Liz Belsky @lizbelsky Follow Ladies, if he: leaves you on read doesn't watch your Insta stories weighs up to 1,000 pounds at his fighting weight - spends all summer eating thousands of salmon from the Brooks River He's not your man. He's 480 Otis, three-time Fat Bear Week champ

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Origin Entry: He's Not Your Man

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Joseph Brostar @joseph_brostar ladies, if he -yells at you makes fun of you and your friends -always bosses you around wears sunglasses inside -keeps dried squid in his pocket at all times he's not your man, he's MYSTERIOUS IDOL PRODUCER TATSUMI KOUTAROU

alison @alisonguzzetti Follow ladies, if he... threatens you with constant messages always wondering where you are blames you for not making him happy enough judges the way you speak makes your undying love into a game for him He's not your man, he's Duo, the duolingo owl 12:07 PM -24 Nov 2018

Cat Damon Followv @CornOnTheGoblin Ladies, if he: only wants to hang out when he's drunk never brings you around his friends fingers on his head - no legs or feet - always trying to sell you pasta He's not your man. He's the hamburger helper glove 11:52 AM - 24 Nov 2018

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Gritty

POSITIVE BRUINS FAN SRAEL 2ejeffsrael25 Ladies, if he: - never responds to your texts Follow - doesn't watch your Insta stories has an unclear backstory is mean to children works as an agent of chao:s - is a furry orange monstrosity He's not your man. He's Gritty 2:59 PM- 24 Nov 2018

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Daily Wire

DAILYhe Daily Wire WIRE @realDailyWire Follow Ladies, if he: ignores text messages doesn't like your tweets is always cold - rarely opens up to you never leaves the house makes weird humming sounds at night He's not your man. He's a refrigerator. 1:41 PM-24 Nov 2018

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Adam Smith

Adam Smith Institute @ASI Follow Ladies, if he: ignores text messages spends all of his time at work insists he can see phantom limbs has encyclopaedic knowledge of ancient physics, logic and astronomy He's not your man. He's the father of modern economics, Adam Smith 7:21 AM-24 Nov 2018

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Rachel

@ #1Rachel ladies, if he: Follow @rachel never texts you back always interjects with unsolicited advice reads your personal documents constantly tries to help you format paragraphs is a sentient paper clip he's not your man. he's clippy the microsoft word office assistant 12:39 AM-24 Nov 2018

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Ramses II

Sarah Parcak Ф @indyfromspace Follow Ladies, if he: -only responds if u text in emojis -doesn't care about your single wife policy -refuses to wear anything but fine linens -is a staunch polytheist -claims victory at Kadesh when it was a tie He's not your man. He's Egypt's greatest king from Dyn 19, Ramesses lI 10:03 PM - 22 Nov 2018

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rutherford b hayes

Kyle @KylePlantEmoji Follow Ladies, if he: only responds after you double text doesn't care about your snap strealk refuses to shave is a staunch abolitionist - returns to Ohio after serving only one term He's not your man. He's 19th president Rutherford B Hayes 2:39 PM -22 Nov 2018

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He's Not Your Man - Fat Bear

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Liz Belsky @lizbelsky Follow Ladies, if he: leaves you on read doesn't watch your Insta stories weighs up to 1,000 pounds at his fighting weight - spends all summer eating thousands of salmon from the Brooks River He's not your man. He's 480 Otis, three-time Fat Bear Week champ

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Uploaded Nov 26, 2018 at 02:25PM EST

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He's Not Your Man

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