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Hi, i'm a mom. You might know me from some of my Greatest Hits like "I thought your game was cancelled", "please don't fart on your sister", "why are there dirty socks in the refrigerator" and "I've clearly failed as a mother, just wait until your father gets home"

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@yourmomsuckstho greatest hits moms

Origin Entry: Hello, I'm a Professor in a Movie

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Hi, l'm a climate scientist. You may know me from my greatest hits including, "No, it's not a natural cycle," "Yes, I know it's beern warmer before (and the only reason YOU know is because we scientists told you so)," and "Just because it's on YouTube doesn't mean it's true."

Rory Turnbull o_roryurmbull Jan 1 Hello, I'm a professor in a movie, I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading/ homework as they leave I am a tweet in a movie @FightMilk22 Replying to @_roryturnbull Hey, I am a high-school senior in a movie. I woke up late today so I'll have to rush to school, but my mad-dash-to-class will highlight some positive social bonds l've formed and l'll probably make it JUST IN TIME to class and make eye contact with a cute girl as I take my seat. 4:21 AM-7 Jan 2019 Tweet your reply

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High School Senior in a Movie

Rory Turnbull o_roryurmbull Jan 1 Hello, I'm a professor in a movie, I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading/ homework as they leave I am a tweet in a movie @FightMilk22 Replying to @_roryturnbull Hey, I am a high-school senior in a movie. I woke up late today so I'll have to rush to school, but my mad-dash-to-class will highlight some positive social bonds l've formed and l'll probably make it JUST IN TIME to class and make eye contact with a cute girl as I take my seat. 4:21 AM-7 Jan 2019 Tweet your reply

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Hacker in a movie

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Hello I’m a high school teacher in a movie. I never hand out tardy slips to students out in the hall when the late bell rings or worry about dress code violations. I never, ever say, “The bell does not dismiss you. I dismiss you.”

Hello I'm a high school teacher in a movie. I never hand out tardy slips to students out in the hall when the late bell rings or worry about dress code violations. I never, ever say, "The bell does not dismiss you. *1* dismiss you." Adele Buck_AdeleBuck Hello, I'm a librarian in a movie. There are no computers, just books. I spend all day pushing a book cart, shelving books, and peering at people through the stacks. Occasionally, I may man the check-out desk. twitter.com /Ceilidhann/sta...

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Hello, I'm a bisexual woman in a movie. I'm evil, sexy, slutty, and hit on everything that moves. I prey on vulnerable young women, seduce upstanding guys with my wiles, and cheat on all my partners. You'll know I'm bi bc I'll mention or show it roughly

Hello, l'm a bisexual woman in a movie. l'm evil, sexy, slutty, and hit on everything that moves. I prey on vulnerable young women, seduce upstanding guys with my wiles, and cheat on all my partners. You'll know I'm bi bc l'll mention or show it roughly every 2 second. Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg@TheRaDR Hello, I'm a rabbi in a movie. I wear my tefillin wrong and don't really know how to pronounce the Hebrew of liturgical phrases that get said 3 times a day, every day. I say things from the pulpit that would be grounds for firing most places and maybe one congregant responds. twitter.com/AnaMardol/sta...

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Hello, I'm a graduate student in a movie. I obviously sleep with my dissertation adviser and then murder someone, probably that adviser.

Hello, I'm a graduate student in a movie. I obviously sleep with my dissertation adviser and then murder someone, probably that adviser. Rory Turnbull @_roryturnbull Hello, I'm a professor in a movie, I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the readina / homework as they leave. Show this thread

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Hello, I'm a lawyer in a movie. Every case is a lengthy jury trial where I'm totally outmatched & losing the entire time. Then, at the final possible moment I have a stroke of genius that no one ever thought of & win the case hands down.

Hello, I'm a lawyer in a movie. Every case is a lengthy jury trial where I'm totally outmatched & losing the entire time. Then, at the final possible moment l have a stroke of genius that no one ever thought of & win the case hands down. Rory Turnbull_roryturnbull Hello, I'm a professor in a movie, I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading /homework as they leave. Show this thread

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Hello, I'm a writer in a movie. I bring a print-out of my long-ass novel to my editor's office & wait while my editor reads the whole thing right in front of me, loves it, & offers me an advance, which I accept. Apparently, my editor pushed my agent out a

Hello, l'm a writer in a movie. I bring a print- out of my long-ass novel to my editor's office & wait while my editor reads the whole thing right in front of me, loves it, & offers me an advance, which I accept. Apparently, my editor pushed my agent out a window right before this

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Hello, I'm a data journalist in a movie. I am not shown.

Hello, I'm a data journalist in a movie. I am not shown. Jeremy Bowers@jeremybowers Hi, I'm a programmer in a movie. My code always works and is rendered in three dimensions on whatever screen I am sitting near. There is literally no programming language I do not know and anything electronic can run my code. twitter.com /navybook/statu.

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Hello, I’m a journalist in a movie. I drink whole bottles of vodka while reporting in the field but somehow churn out prose my editor deems worthy of a Pulitzer.

Hello, l'm a journalist in a movie. I drink whole bottles of vodka while reporting in the field but somehow churn out prose my editor deems worthy of a Pulitzer. Rory Turnbull @_roryturnbull Hello, I'm a professor in a movie, I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading/ homework as they leave. Show this thread

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Hello, I'm a doctor in a movie. I use defib on a flatlined patient instead of adrenaline, despite knowing that a flatline is the goal of defibrillation. I also do CPR compressions wrong. I use my position of authority to pressure an underling into a rom

Hello, I'm a doctor in a movie. I use defib on a flatlined patient instead of adrenaline, despite knowing that a flatline is the goal of defibrillation. I also do CPR compressions wrong. I use my position of authority to pressure an underling into a romantic relationship. Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg Φ @TheRaDR Hello, I'm a rabbi in a movie. I wear my tefillin wrong and don't really know how to pronounce the Hebrew of liturgical phrases that get said 3 times a day, every day. I say things from the pulpit that would be grounds for firing most places and maybe one congregant responds...

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Hello, I’m a rabbi in a movie. I wear my tefillin wrong and don’t really know how to pronounce the Hebrew of liturgical phrases that get said 3 times a day, every day. I say things from the pulpit that would be grounds for firing most places and maybe o

Hello, I'm a rabbi in a movie. I wear my tefillin wrong and don't really know how to pronounce the Hebrew of liturgical phrases that get said 3 times a day, every day. I say things from the pulpit that would be grounds for firing most places and maybe one congregant responds. Ana Mardoll @AnaMardoll Hello, I'm an programmer in a movie. I'm white, male, and conspicuously nerdy, and everything I code works on the first try. I'm the Best Coder because I'm a fast typist, and I type extra fast in programming emergencies. I never Google error messages. There are no error messages. twitter.com/Ceilidhann/sta... Show this thread

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Hello, I'm an programmer in a movie. I'm white, male, and conspicuously nerdy, and everything I code works on the first try. I'm the Best Coder because I'm a fast typist, and I type extra fast in programming emergencies. I never Google error messages. T

Hello, I'm an programmer in a movie. I'm white, male, and conspicuously nerdy, and everything I code works on the first try. I'm the Best Coder because l'm a fast typist, and I type extra fast in programming emergencies. I never Google error messages. There are no error messages. Kayleigh Donaldson Φ @Ce.lidhan n Hello, I'm a writer in a movie. I write one piece a week and live in a two bedroom New York apartment with a walk-in wardrobe. Also I never actually pitch anywhere, the jobs just come to me. twitter.com/_roryturnbull/...

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Hello, I'm a Professor in a Movie - Hi, i'm a mom. You might know me from some of my Greatest Hits like "I thought your game was cancelled", "please don't fart on your sister", "why are there dirty socks in the refrigerator" and "I've clearly failed as a mother, just wait until your father

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Hi, i'm a mom. You might know me from some of my Greatest Hits like "I thought your game was cancelled", "please don't fart on your sister", "why are there dirty socks in the refrigerator" and "I've clearly failed as a mother, just wait until your father gets home"

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Uploaded Jan 22, 2019 at 01:41PM EST

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Hello, I'm a Professor in a Movie

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