The Virgin Cloud
- Dumb, spiky hair, probably got his head stuck up a Chocobo's ass
- Accessorizes his uniform with random garbage found in the slums, probably to distract from his wimpy physique
- Clearly overcompensating with his Buster Sword, swings it around like he never had training in his life
- Has a harem of girls craving his dick 24/7, still doesn't give enough shits to notice
- "I ain't your bro."
- Reveal trailer done on a shoestring budget, his own theme too boring to be included

The Chad Sephiroth
- Long, beautiful silver locks, downs a whole shampoo bottle per shower because he's worth it
- Rocked a badass leather coat before The Matrix did it, proudly shows off his bulging chest for anyone to see
- His sword is longer than he is tall, but relies on his Masamune instead in order to not be unprofessional
- Loves his mother very much, would drop a meteor on anyone who disses her
- Gives you dis pear in the most trying of times
- Reveal trailer shows him slashing a god in two like it was Tuesday, one nanosecond of his theme already tells you what this guy is all about

Ok, now he is the strongest character in Smash.