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: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:44:44 No.845311946 I am broken. | am beyond broken. I still don't know what's WE ARE happening. Why was today allowed to happen? what the f--- is going on? TRU 125 KB JPG : Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:45:18 No.845311985 COFION DIERDISE >>845311946 (OP) # 20 KB JPG >>845312102 # : Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:46:14 No.845312046 LESS MAKEY THREADS Hint: you're retarded MORE TAKEY MEDS 65 KB JPG

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Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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Anonymous ITT: Cooking buzzwords you hat(...) 1.4 MB WEBM 11/01/24(Fri)04:24:25 No.20946633 >comfort food All food is supposed to be comforting, there's no non-comfort food that's worth cooking. >soul food Its just basic American homemade dishes, but greasier and overcooked. >creamy Probably means it is tasteless without being buried in heavy whipping cream to mask the taste. >garlicky See above, just replace whipping cream with garlic. >fusion Oh wow, you added soy sauce to it, such fusion. Anonymous 11/01/24(Fri)04:39:15 No.20946637 >literal autistic retard triggered by everyday words and phrases thread no #43923948234 >>20946994 # >>20947280 #

BREAKING: Justin Trudeau to resign as Prime Minister of Canada It's Trudover... 466 KB PNG 01/05/25(Sun) 23:25:58 No.493452575 >Goes into office and Inherits a generous surplus from the conservative party >Squanders it all and ends up collecting more debt than all other PM combined >Lets food prices shoot through the roof, to the point Canadians are keeling over from scurvy (yes the pirate disease) >Exiles hobo towns and closes roads for a Taylor Swift concert >Doesnt do the same for a veterans parade >Allows swarms of jeets destroy the job market. >Provides incentives to jobs if they hire foreign jeets but not for Canadian citizens >Decides to throw all the blame on to his subordinates >They all resign and tell him to eat s--- >Does nothing and hides in his office for the holidays >Eventually rage quits after everyone calls for his resignation. Canacucks... I thought we had it bad.

Anonymous 37 KB JPG >be me 08/25/21(Wed)23:12:04 No.861801953 >22 and poor in college >deliver food for a restaurant for a few months >sometimes people order takeout but don't pick it up >if it happens late enough in my shift I get to take it home with me >always ate the best those nights since it was free >be me now, 35+ >started calling corporate restaurants and ordering takeout about a half hour before close >always spoof the caller ID to show up as my ex wife >been doing it for about 3 years >never pick it up >gives me a warm fuzzy feeling knowing i gave some young person a free meal and also my ex gets black listed from every restaurant in town

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anons dad is a hero | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)21:24:15 No.845349589 1608053155613.png 1.42 MB PNG >in boy scouts >scout master is r----- me >dad runs in >'hey pal, how about you f--- someone your own size' >dad pulls down pants >scout master starts to f--- dad >dad uses his a------ muscles to grab hold of scout master by d--- >slams scout master against wall >dad rapes scout master to death My dad, the hero!

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The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)14:54:10 No.845329227 >be me >high school, years ago >addicted to benzos bc anxiety (only weed now) >friend group has one girl >anorexic depressed goth/egirl, 7/10 but my type at the time 10 KB JPG >high af hanging at friends house >playing 5 finger fillet >stab my f------ hand, don't care bc benzo zombie at this point >she tells me to stab her too >do it >she presses her cut into yours >blood mixes >become siblings >says we can't f--- now bc it would be i----- What's the strangest excuse a girl has rejected you /b/?

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things are looking up for anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)19:26:14 No.845340737 >finally got good career >getting married to the love of my life in a few weeks >have our first kid on the way Thinking of killing myself. You know, for the lulz and such. Lol could you imagine the look on that stupid bitch's 67 KB PNG face?

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Anon is gonna fall | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/17/21(Sun)01:38:27 No.9368776 ANON NOO00 WE CANT DO THAT UNLESS WE ARE MARRIED 52 KB JPG : King's 01/17/21(Sun)01:43:34 No.9368787 | Anonymous 01/17/21(Sun)01:44:43 No.9368789 ock iStock by y ge iStock iSto IStock Stock iry tmages iStock Gny Imaga ck Tstock iSt istockphoto-140253542-1024x1024.jpg 313 KB JPG PLEASE MIKU! JUST GRAB MY HAND! I'M GONNA FALL >>9369100 # >>9369277 # >>9369726 # >>9370007 # >>9370595 # >>9370785 # >>9374916 # >>9376261 #

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Anon flies a J-20 | /r/Greentext

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OP the wall shitter | /r/Greentext

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Anon woke up Chris Breezy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: boi8mKM9 ) 04/25/14(Fri)14:11:39 No.543818057 > Be year 2040, women rule the world > Rihanna is their leader > Be stuck in concentration camp for men > Rihanna killing all the dudes because they found a way to reproduce without 83 KB PNG us > Group of us overpower gaurdesses > Be running > Get surrounded > standoff.PNG > all of a sudden a masked hero appears, with his schlong flapping in the wind > beats up all the women > sets all the dudes free > much wow, many thanks > takes mask off > mfw it was Chris Brown

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“Anon loves his dad” in 2070 after it’s screenshotted and reposted some more | /r/Greentext

>be me >sad depressed >suicidal thoughts >dad notices >thinks it's because of my siblings >thinks i dont get enough attention >takes me to the planetarium every other 29 KB JPG weekend because i love space >falls asleep every time because he's working 12h a day >he always takes me >still alive ake dad

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Anon has a problem part 2 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/28/18(Fri)20:22:10 No.788472318 >be me >sitting alone in my basement fapping to martha speaks like a respectable adult >hear a shuffling in the walls >pause my fap fuel and put my ear to the wall 554 KB JPG >I can hear it..the unmistakable sound of a d--- dragging across insulation >my god, they're back >suddenly a hole is torn in the wall and there it is, looking at me with eyes full of lust >the r--- dwarf has found me again. >it sees my lubriderm covered c--- and shakes with excitement >I grab the closest object and throw it as hard as can at the fat little f--- >hoho! It shrieks and disappears back into the wal and I run upstairs >I must prepare.

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Anon brings a girl home | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)00:35:50 No.845270261 >Be me >21 Chad >Bring qt.3.14 home to smash > "Oh Anon, your d--- is huge" >About to penetrate >Start violently s------- everywhere >Autism kicks in and turn around 5 KB JPG with my s----cano facing her mouth >She leaves after showering I repeatedly apologise. >Never see her again and blocked on all social media >I poo'd on purpose >Mfw

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Anon meets the love of his life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)13:16:32 No.845322222 >be me 8 years ago >15, had no source of income, parents didn't care about me at all, absolute nobody in school >met qt3.14 in school 152 KB JPG cafeteria >try to talk to her but autism kicks in and i wanted to kms >she says she is fine and understands me >she says im smart >we make eye contact for a few seconds then hug >ffw to now, we live together, we are financially stable and im about to propose to the love of my life pic unrelated

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Anon found a tinder date who loves movies! | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)17:32:30 No.845307042 >>845307166 >>84530 >go on tinder >meet up with this girl >asks me what movie to watch >look through her netflix >notice a lot of movies have been half-watched >after 20-30 minutes in it got paused >go through counting them all pretending to browse >she is focussed on instagram on her phone >130 movies >130 d----? >choose a movie >after 18 minutes she starts kissing on my neck >realise that she's probably riddled with stds >might have covid >after putting her hand on my lap and feeling my d--- >oh it's very hard, lets pause the movie for now >she kisses me again >starts rubbing my d--- through my trousers >i start making my orgasm face >shake my entire body >moan her name out loudly >wow you just made me c-- >she looks annoyed >really? >tell her i forgot i have a dentist appointment and need to go >she picks up her phone and probably texts another guy to come over >next few days no symptoms >feels good man Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)17:33:42 No.845307139 good dodge my man Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)17:36:55 No.845307378 >>845308231 >>8453 >>845307042 (OP) >has tinder account >is worried about stds Anon, i.

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Greentext Stories - Anon is confused | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:44:44 No.845311946 I am broken. | am beyond broken. I still don't know what's WE ARE happening. Why was today allowed to happen? what the f--- is going on? TRU 125 KB JPG : Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:45:18 No.845311985 COFION DIERDISE >>845311946 (OP) # 20 KB JPG >>845312102 # : Anonymous 01/20/21(Wed)10:46:14 No.845312046 LESS MAKEY THREADS Hint: you're retarded MORE TAKEY MEDS 65 KB JPG

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