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File : 1285640447.jpg-(529 KB, 1024x762, 4654992908_4d5f391841_b.jpg) O LegoSpace The Goddamn Duck 09/27/10(Mon)22:20 No.12248169 FTL drive was always problematic, until Brik Theory was solidified. By envisioning the very fabric of reality as a series of interconnected bricks, which could be separated and immediately plugged back together, scientists were able to create a jump drive that worked by threading ships briefly through a nearby, mostly-empty dimension. Efficient. Quick. Safe, even within close proximity to planets. Surprisingly easy to maintain. The brik drive ushered in a new era of space exploration, and a joint project between several countries - the Futron Project. The moon bases were set up within months, complete with a top-of-the-line monorail connecting them, and the Mars base was fast-tracked. Then came Blacktron Enterprises. The company stole the secrets of the brik drive in pieces - bits from NASA, from Roscosmos, and - mostly - from the Chinese, who had already managed to piece together more than half the drive through their own security networks. Setting their sights on more distant goals, they started flooding nearby solar systems, setting claim to as many Class M planets as they could. Vessels from the Futron Project that entered Blacktron space were invariably raided for supplies, and usually taken captive, under the pretense that the Futron ships were "illegal invaders". When action was set to be taken against Blacktron, they responded by abandoning their corporate HQ on Earth, and relocating to Tau Centauri. This action prompted the creation of the Universal Code of Law, and the Space Police. O The Goddamn Duck 09/27/10(Mon)22:30 No.12248270 File1285641039.jpg-(352 KB, 1024x824, 4568072707_b695a464e4_b.jpg) >>12248169 The UCL was essentially maritime law applied to space travel, and was surprisingly straightforward for a committee-created code. As a result, the Space Police had a fairly easy time of their original duties - escorting Futron Project ships, protecting them from Blacktron raiders, and investigating criminal offenses that occurred on vessels - offenses that were, thankfully, rare in those days. After the raids became more blatant, and Blacktron vessels began raiding FP outposts directly, the Corporate Accord was passed, allowing the FP to treat Blacktron as a national body instead of merely a corporation. This allowed them to begin taking out Blacktron bases, declaring war on them officially. It also cleared the way for more corporations to legitimately take to the stars, and to found their own colonies, assured that in doing so they would be recognized by the vague terms of the Corporate Accord as national bodies themselves. The first was the Japanese MTron corporation, previously a leading company in robotics, who had fallen into financial problems in recent years. Funded by an influx of would-be colonists, they set themselves up as the first formally-recognized commercial cargo vessels to use the brik drive, as well as the first publicly-accessible interstellar flights. O The Goddamn Duck 09/27/10(Mon)22:45 No.12248422 File1285641908.jpg-(170 KB, 1024x721, 4755641811_9195c6b34d_b.jpg) >>12248270 At first, the MTron vessels were merely used as an auxiliary for Futron Project resources, as well as for tourist trade on their own colonies; they refused to service Blacktron colonies. The extra cargo capabilities were welcomed during what was technically wartime, and helped the resource-stretched Space Police to slowly overwhelm Blacktron forces. It wasn't until the next corporation stretched its wings outward that the Blacktron threat was nullified, however. The Tienshan Mining Group had colonized the recently-discovered M-Class planet Krysto, and was busily working at mining the planet - not only for the amazingly versatile substance Orangium, an isotope that was quickly built into their own tools and adopted by large slices of the galaxy as a power source, but also for water. Krysto was a world with two frigid, but inhabitable, poles, a tiny temperate zone, and a vast swath of uninhabitable volcanic belts about its equator. The result was a planet buffeted by constant, violent snowfall. This was also Blacktron's last temptation. Attempting to secure the Orangium mines as a way to boost their steadily-crumbling production, the Blaktron forces did not realize that A) they had committed far too much of their resources to the invasion, B) their vessels, which were specialized for space travel, would have issues icing up in the moisture-laden atmosphere, and C) the Space Police had already gotten word of their plans. The defeat was crushing; within the year, only a few distant outposts were still controlled by Blacktron forces, all of which were cut off from each other, and considered widely to be little more than bandits. O The Goddamn Duck 09/27/10(Mon)23:03 No.12248631 File1285642983.jpg-(222 KB, 800x569, display.cgi (1).jpg) >>12248422 After this, there was a massive influx of new groups seeking their fortune in the stars. The UK-based Unitron and Franco-Italian Exploriens began setting down roots, as did the Canadian-based Spyrius Corporation - which unabashedly admitted to stealing the brik drive, and most of their technology, instead of developing it themselves, pointing to the legacy of Apple and Microsoft. It was at this time that the aliens made themselves known. The first two examples of first contact were nearly concurrent. First, a ship emerging from brikspace was followed - and destroyed - by a sleek vessel with a half-disk shaped front end. A message transmitted from the hostile ship took nearly a year to decode, but stated in essence that further incursions into their space - the dimension that brik drive accessed - would not be tolerated. The Insectoids proved to be much more amicable to human presence. The initial contact, made by the Exploriens, proved that at least one race out there in the galaxy was intelligent and - more importantly - didn't want to kill us. A nonagression pact was quickly hammered out, languages shared, and in the wake of the struggle against the UFOS from Brikspace, the queen of the Insectoid people gifted the collective factions of humanity with information on a propulsion system that would allow us to pass through Brikspace without being detected by "The Aggressors". It worked - seemingly. The incursions from the transdimensional entities became far more sporadic, and easier to deal with. However, the new drive slowed travel considerably; its maximum speed was less than half that of the previous brik drive. And, in a twist that conspiracy theorists claim is far worse than the previous invasions, the queen now claimed that mankind owed them a favor - one she would collect on if she ever needed it. O The Goddamn Duck 09/27/10(Mon)23:12 No.12248727 >>12248631 From that point on, travel further from Earth resulted in contact with countless alien species. Mankind has proliferated among the stars, always going outwards, always seeking the next frontier. The Space Police are still around, although their aim has become more domestic, as the colony worlds have become less like scientific outposts and more like any other city on any other planet. Each of the other factions mentioned has remained, in some form... The Futron Project is still responsible for most near-Earth settlements, including the Mars base. They were the ones responsible for discovering the long-dormant Martian civilizations that rested beneath the dusty soil, and for sharing the brik drive with our neighbors - although the Martians have declined to use it so far, more than content with their self-sufficient communities. Futron Project vessels tend to be mostly scientific affairs, with top-of-the-line sensor arrays and onboard labs, although lightly armed. Their only agendas are exploration, and furthering diplomacy with extraterrestrial entities. However, the Futron Project has been slammed as being a "humans only" club, and even their spinoff peacekeeping force, the Space Police, has been criticized for anti-alien prejudices. The FP is on excellent terms with Unitron. They deal extensively with MTron, but consider their commercial leanings to be a detriment to their focus. They do not trust Spyrius, and avoid them whenever possible. Blacktron forces are under a shoot-on-sight order. Exploriens is viewed as a rival more than an ally, mostly because of their close connection to the barely-trusted Insectoids. O The Goddamn Duck 09/27/10(Mon)23:22 No.12248845 >>12248727 Unitron is considered by many to be the fringe-world equivalent of the Futron Project, and thať's not too far off. Their cities tend to be a bit more stark and utilitarian than the Futron equivalents, with security cameras monitoring every square inch of public space. They tend to be a better-armed people than the Futron Project, and have heavily armored their vessels, so that most light assaults are futile; this has significantly lessened their reliance on the Space Police, to the point where their own colonial security forces can handle most problems that arise. Likewise, their manufacturing and mining divisions - which are widespread and highly profitable - are run with a keen eye to oversight and zero tolerance for corruption or laziness. They are far more suspicious of extraterrestrials, as the first contact with "The Aggressors" resulted in the destruction of one of their colony vessels; any nonhuman living in a Unitron colony is essentially treated as a second-class citizen. Unitron is on excellent terms with the FP, although they are wary of what they consider to be pro-alien sentiments running through their ranks. They are outrightly hostile towards the "Xeno-loving freaks" of Exploriens. Spyrius gets a bit more respect in their eyes, as at least those blokes are trying to earn a living, and doing it without shooting at people (if they can help it). MTron, likewise, is viewed with admiration and respect, though the tourism angle pushed by MTron colonies raises a few eyebrows among their ranks. Blacktron are nothing but common criminals and are to be treated as such, though they're surely no threat anymore, and the Insectoids... creepy little buggers... well, let's just say that if anything is to happen to one of their vessels in Unitron space, they wouldn't complain. O The Goddamn Duck 09/27/10(Mon)23:33 No.12248953 >>12248845 Exploriens has filled large sections of the fringe, their name saying it all; the corporation is almost insatiably curious and xenophilic. They have a limited R&D department, mostly dedicated to adaptation and improvement of alien technology they discover and/or trade for, which has made their vessels some of the most distinctive, and - to outsiders - difficult to operate in known space. An Exploriens ship may have an Insectoid Orangium power cell, Squidfolk inertial dampeners, and a Silicin-designed computer bank. Their colonies are set up as immense trading posts, with nominal tariffs making another decent chunk of their profit margin. The Exploriens are on good terms with the FP, although they wish they'd just stop whining about the Insectoids and see that people are people, even if they're chitinous and cybernetic. They are on outstanding terms with the Insectoids, having nearly won over the inwardly-driven, isolationist people. They are on poor footing with Unitron, and are not seeking to improve things with the "backwards, provincial bigots". MTron is just another company to be dealt with on a case-by-case basis, and while they are not hostile towards them, they have to wonder about a company that treats this new frontier in such a menial way. They are openly hostile towards Spyrius, as trading and refining alien tech that they've traded for legitimately is a main source of income for them, and they're not fond of those that would steal it. Oddly, they have little problem with the straggler Blacktron colonies - as long as they stay in their own corner of the galaxy. O The Goddamn Duck 09/27/10(Mon)23:43 No.12249031 >>12248953 MTron is all about two things: Service, and style! They see no reason why the wonders of space shouldn't be available to the public at large, and likewise don't see why it shouldn't be as comfortable as possible - as long as they're willing to pay for it. To that end, MTron colonies are heavily urbanized, high-tech wonderlands that are aimed at tourists as much as colonists. MTron vessels have vast cargo holds, reflecting well their status as a middleman, dealing with anyone with a pocketbook to be opened. They also tend to be sluggish and oversized... while the colonies are practically pieces of art, the vessels MTron uses are almost universally worn, fidgety, and substandard in capability. They're reliable - almost supernaturally so, for things held together by spit and duct tape, and you'd never know they were in such shape if you were to ride on one as a passenger - but most other vessels can fly rings around an MTron ship. MTron trades openly with the Exploriens, the Futron Project, and Unitron, figuring that their credits spend as well as anyone's - and besides, all that political crap they're having problems with will wash out eventually. They consider Spyrius to be a competing company, but will ally with them readily if the proper contracts are in place. They will even service Blacktron colonies, as long as they've got some backup and a loaded ion cannon. The Insectoids, however, don't seem to be affected by the power of positive marketing, and want nothing to do with MTron... possibly owing to a diplomatic error in their early negotiations. O The Goddamn Duck 09/27/10(Mon)23:55 No.12249139 >>12249031 Spyrius. The universe's greatest hackers, programmers, and data-traders. If it's out there, they want to know about it, and to hell with restrictions. They consider themselves to be the last true gentleman pirates in an age where DRM is almost mandatory, where someone'll shoot you for just memorizing a blueprint. They're not bandits - they're bon vivants, rebels making a statement, and making a profit at the same time! Their colonies tend to be arcologies, tight tunnels of winding passages with visible wiring and access ports for easy maintenance. Not exactly welcoming, but it's quite easy to live there - as long as you know a little something about basic electronics and engineering. Most of their colonies serve as listening posts. Their ships are decently armed, lightly armored, and VERY maneuverable. The saucer-shaped vessels have been upgraded steadily since they cracked Aggressor ships, making them some of the quickest, most annoying ships out there. Don't expect anything larger than a light freighter, though. few scans of Spyrius is on questionable terms with the FP. They can get along beautifully, as long as Spyrius doesn't let on just how much they know about their hidden files. They deal openly with Unitron, and like their funds just fine - if only they didn't have their heads up their rear ends as far as aliens go. There's a fine line between healthy paranoia and idiocy. They aren't on good terms with the Exploriens, but are fascinated by their discoveries. Blacktron is nothing more than a bunch of idiot bullies, the sort of people that beat them up in school - the sort of people they take no small delight in shooting down. MTron is just too glossy on the surface, with nothing worthwhile beneath - they can deal with them, but only if there's something in it for them. And the Insectoids? They don't know what to make of them, but they have such wonderful toys! O The Goddamn Duck 09/28/10(Tue)00:04 No.12249202 >>12249139 The Insectoids are by far the largest alien empire that the factions of man has discovered. Encompassing no less than 300 hive planets, they are a people that are content. They have ceased explorations, conquests, and all external activity, focusing inward, on improving their own lives. Supported by genetic therapy and cybernetics, the average Insectoid lives to be over 300 years old, and may hit 400 if she's lucky. The only thing that has pulled the quasi-bugfolk out of their introverted state has been humans - such a varied, contradictory bunch! The Insectoids are fascinated by them, for a variety of reasons, including the fact that their history and philosophies are so closely mirrored. The Insectoids are on excellent terms with the Exploriens, whose curiosity is infectious to them, and nostalgic of their own first steps into space. They admire the productive drive of Unitron - if only they weren't so shortsighted. The FP are much like themselves in agenda and drive, and easy to negot with. MTron are children playing with toys they do not understand, and do nothing to contribute to the greater good. The fools of Spyrius are not much better - but at least they have a philosophy to guide them, even if it is a laughably simplistic one. And Blacktron is to be pitied, a broken people, waiting for death to finally take their society. O The Goddamn Duck 09/28/10(Tue)00:16 No.12249309 >>12249202 In their cold, cold bases, the people of Blacktron see themselves as a proud group of warriors. The first to break from Earth's tightly-controlled regiments. The first to seek their fortune in space, free of the countries that would hold them back. The first to defy Terran rule! They bite their tongues back at the thought at being the first to fail - they are still alive, after all, and still waiting for their time to rise. Blacktron colonies are military camps, where harsh conditions and cloning spit out some of the most conditioned, perfectly-trained soldiers of all time. However, they are poorly equipped - while their ships are certainly nothing to laugh at, having picked up bits and pieces of key technology in their raids over the years, their designs keenly focused on power and speed, they are still behind the times, and short on numbers compared to their foes. Blacktron considers FP to be the great enemy, to be destroyed at any cost. Unitron are a militant branch of the FP, and are to fall in short order after their primary foe is gone. The Exploriens are dreamers who are trying to find their own way in the galaxy, even if that way is naive and ignoble, and are to be left alone. Spyrius has such potential - if only they would stop snatching at the purse-strings of the foes and strike at their faces! MTron is but a tool, point, and will join Blacktron when the time comes, or they are an obstacle, to be blocked off from their enemies long enough to take them out. Time will tell which it is. neutral party to purchase the tools needed for their eventual rise to power. And the Insectoids are an unknown quantity. Either they will be a turning O The Goddamn Duck 09/28/10(Tue)01:17 No.12249853 >>12249765 The so-called "Robo Force" has set up shop on Titan, and is quite content to stay there. A group of engineers and obsessive hobbyists, the RF's goal is nothing less than advancing robotic technology until they can create a full-scale, fully functional Gundam (or Megazord, or what-have-you. Different geeks, different goal, same broad stroke). They have had some luck with smaller-scale robots - about the size of a tank - but they still lack the resources to manage anything larger with any success. Most of their creations are sold off to be used for mercenary work or for entertainment - at least one of their robots was a centerpiece in a major Bollywood sci-fi holo released last year. While not formally allied or shunned by any group, rumors have begun to circulate that the RF was actually commissioned by Blacktron to build a new line of crawlers for them. They deny such claims vigorously... but then, surveillance shots of their newest work have raised a few eyebrows. O The Goddamn Duck 09/28/10(Tue)14:59 No.12254840 File1285700351.jpg-(75 KB, 777x635, 4460085527_6cfe221f5c_o.jpg) COMMON TECHNOLOGY -Brik Drive- All but ubiquitous, the brik drive works on Quantum Brik Tunnel technology; in an instant, the drive "takes apart" the building blocks of reality, shifts the ship sideways through said hole, and repairs the hole. Thanks to the Insectoids, the new drives allow ships moving through the "other space" without attracting the attention of the native species, via keeping them partially in phase with their home dimension. A brik drive jump can allow a ship to travel from Earth to Pluto in less than an hour. The drives typically use refined Orangium discs as a power source, but other energy supplies do exist. -lon Drive- The chosen sub-light drive of most of the galaxy, ion drive is cheap, reliable, and incredibly compact. An ion drive propulsion unit the size of a frisbee is sufficient to move a ship the size of a VW Bug. Most ships, however, use multiple ion pads for maneuverability's sake, or - in the case of fighters - potent ion turbines, which also provide a secondary power source for shielding units and weaponry. -MagDrive- MTron ships use their own proprietary sublight drives. Close examination has shown that they use potent magnetic fields, but how that works in the void of space has never been determined exactly. The drives are closely guarded knowledge, and - while inferior in most regards - are far superior as far as energy consumption, taking next to no energy to use. For now, this presumably magnetic drive system appears almost... miraculous. O The Goddamn Duck 09/28/10(Tue)15:12 No.12254926 >>12254840 -Weaponry- If one was to catalogue every piece of weaponry found on every ship in the known galaxy, the list would be several hundred pages long. There are countless known starship weapon systems, most of them existing in multiple distinct subtypes. The most commonly used weapons include railguns, ion cannons, masers, torpedoes, and a few solid-shell weapons. -Shields- Shielding technology remains fairly consistent through the various factions. Quantum force fields are either projected in a bubble from the ship via external emitters, or on the surface of the ship's armor through an internal emitter web. The former is prized because it gives a bit of leeway for the ship to escape damage if a sufficiently large explosion were to damage the shields, and the latter because in saving energy on projecting the shield outward, it is possible to strengthen the shield greatly.

> O Anonymous 12/02/15(Wed)08:56:11 No.43945056 >>43949991 >>43944899 (OP) I had a squad of Imperial Guard, lead by a Commissar, versus Necrons. After most of my squad was murdered by Gauss fire from the Immortals, the squad rolled a morale check and failed. Now, there were only two units left. The Commissar, and a quardsman. The Commissar's special rule kicked in, and he shot the Guardsman in the face..Then charged the Necron lines alone. To his credit, he took out two Immortals with his power sword before he went down. 7 Anonymous 12/02/15(Wed)16:13:14 No.43949991 ► >>43958477 File: 1418489190054.jpg (103 KB, 524x492) exhentai >>43945056 >squad broken due to too many casualties >shoots last surviving member of the squad >squad morale restored O Anonymous 12/02/15(Wed)23:38:40 No.43958477 ► >>43959844 >>43949991 ># of Guardsmen with poor morale: 0

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the seer tells you your future is to become an evil overlord

O Anonymous 01/30/21(Sat)22:44:57 No.77258684 E >>77258795 >>77258841 >>77258846 >>77259110 >>77259185 >>77259502 >>77259512 >>77259542 >>77259547 >>77259604 >>77259675 >>77260073 >>77260098 >>77260138 >>77260167 >>77260179 >>77260305 >>77260306 >>77260343 >>77260523 >>77260555 >>77260641 >>77261441 >>77261856 >>77262808 >>77263036 >>77263262 >>77263387 >>77263425 >>77263450 >>77263495 >>77263534 >>77263918 >>77264075 >>77264864 >77265016 >>77265085 >>77265305 >>77265493 >>77267292 >>77267403 >>77267456 >>77268464 >>77269193 >>77270017 >>77270076 >>77270136 >>77270167 >>77270251 >>77270255 >>77270944 >>77270994 >>77271661 >>77271751 >77272038 >>77272096 >>77272227 >>77275864 >>77279260 >>77279328 >>77279673 >>77279829 >>77280713 >>77281875 >After reading your character's future, the seer tells them this: "It is your destiny to become the greatest enemy of the light that this world shall ever see. Never shall there even be a villain who can compare to you." How does your character react to this? Hard Mode: Provided that you accept that this is your character's destiny, how would they go about fulfilling this prophecy? O Anonymous 01/30/21(Sat)23:20:56 No.77259085 >>77259142 >>77259465 Oh boy, prophecies, those always go over wellI. I guess first order of business is to kill the seer so she doesn't go telling everyone that they should try and stop me. After that, just keep doing what I was doing, I guess. Either she's wrong, and I shouldn't worry, or she's right, and fate will figure it out. O Anonymous 01/30/21(Sat)23:25:55 No.77259142 >>77259201 >>77259213 >>77259465 >>77259085 >I guess first order of business is to kill the seer Sounds like something a great and terrible villain would do upon hearing this prophesy. O Anonymous 01/30/21(Sat)23:31:22 No.77259213 ► >>77259142 Lol this. So, SO many prophecies come to pass when the villain tries to stop it from happening. Anonymous 01/30/21(Sat)23:51:14 No.77259465 ► >>77259085 >>77259142 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DdqnvxiHu_Oc [Remove] The Prophecy Hotline Watch later Share DON'T O Anonymous 01/30/21(Sat)23:30:13 No.77259201 >>77269881 >>77259142 It's just pragmatic. If this chick goes around saying l'll become a great evil, do you know how many scores of Paladins will kick down my door? Better to keep her quiet, permanently O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)15:57:01 No.77269881 >>77259201 Yeah unless somebody starts investigating the Seer's death and finds out what her very last prophecy was. And now, you've got EVERYONE on your ass; because they think you're up to something and killed the only witness. O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)00:43:51 No.77260167 >>77263316 >»77267587 File: Mikhailos, the redeemed p(...).jpg (58 KB, 704x824) >>77258684 (OP) "So be it then. If I cannot be a beacon of hope for this world, then I shall be a hammer that tempers its virtue. I shall perform such acts of villany that heroes will have no choice but to rise against me. I shall be the one against whom the light's mettle will be tested. The world will find unity either against me, or under me." O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)00:57:21 No.77260305 ► >>77261652 File: Spoiler Image (74 KB, 1300x737) >>77258684 (OP) I will accept this terrible purpose. I shall become the obstacle humanity needs to overcome to reach its ultimate potential. O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)03:54:08 No.77261652 ► >>77260305 Could it be? Is... is that... WATER!? AHHHH I'M DECOMPOSING! DON'T SAVE ME SIONA O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)00:57:33 No.77260306 ► File: 3AF6C1F2-1926-4A54-B331-2(..).gif (2.95 MB, 500x500) >>77258684 (OP) Great, If my fate is to become a villain then I will strike a deal with fate. I WILL NOT do anything bad until I'm a king with a harem. Because it is my fate to be a villain, this must happen. Upon fate granting my wishes, I wll fulfill my end of the deal. O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)08:03:19 No.77263387 ► >>77258684 (OP) Set about my ambition to take over the world assured that I can beat the competition. O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)09:07:18 No.77263918 ► >>77264156 >>77258684 (OP) Question: Is the seer always right or is it some s----- carnie-bunkum? O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)09:25:44 No.77264156 >>77263918 Traditionally it's a self-fulfilling prophecy brought on by trying to avoid it. So, malarkey, but very advanced. O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)11:14:06 No.77265598 ► File: 1592547389859.jpg (72 KB, 520x664) My character is a believer in the absolute and unavoidable fate. That is, like, her entire thing. So her reaction will be >Well s---, gotta begin kicking puppies. I don't want to, but the stars will punish me if I disobey, and l'll end up doing it anyway. O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)14:13:47 No.77268361 File: A9271C21B1F950F853086E570(..).jpg (19 KB, 637x358) *Smiles* Well then lets you and me get this party started. Oh yes you heard right. You keep on staring into that crystal ball of yours and give me a heads up on what's too come. In return you'll be a made ma- er lady. You want a palace? I know just the place to build one. Servants? There's a town not far from here I'm sure we can talk them into working for you. Boys? Girls? I can rustle you up some fine specimens. Whaddaya say? We have a deal? I can sweeten some more if like. O Anonymous 01/30/21(Sat)23:49:05 No.77259435 >>77259447 >>77259562 >>77271703 OK. So, what do you say to the offer of becoming my totalitarian empire's second in command? According to you, I've got the potential to become an absolute dictator. Considering my present position in life, I doubt this is plausible without my having a serious Outside Context Problem as an advantage over the rest of the world. That's where you and your ability to predict the future come in. http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/visionsofabetterworld >The decision was made. Foundation researchers finally received permission to conduct a large-scale system of exposure to SCP-028. Dozens of people would be sent through the empty storage yard every day and thoroughly interviewed and, if need be, interrogated to determine what they had learned. Every scrap of information would be recorded, analyzed and, if deemed sufficiently valuable, released to the general public. >The first month alone resulted in designs for a cold-fusion plant that could power a city the size of London indefinitely, the composition of a fertilizer that would break down harmlessly in seawater and the name of the designer of SCP-914. The Foundation, through its numerous fronts, was rapidly able to improve the quality of life of almost every human on Earth, providing the world with the technologies and knowledge it needed to become a better place. >Then James Harrison Reuben walked through the yard. >James Harrison Reuben was a cable repairman from Topeka, Kansas. A blue-collar worker in a simple, menial job. A perfect receptacle for knowledge. We sent him in with visions of new advancements and beautiful new technologies dancing through our heads. >He came out with the knowledge of how to conquer the world. O Anonymous 01/30/21(Sat)23:50:07 No.77259447 >>77259562 >>77271703 >>77259435 >It's been seven years since then. His armies and death squads march through the streets of every city in the world. Every battle is a devastating victory: how can it be otherwise, when he has perfect knowledge of all our battle plans before they even happen? It is only a matter of time before he overruns our final stronghold. >l'm sending this message out through our wide-band radio transmitter on the off chance that someone will get this message. I'm doing this because the last transmission of our intelligence operatives, before they went dark, shows that Reuben is building space ships. Hundreds of them, lined up in ranks stretching across the Florida coastline. >But I can't shake the feeling that maybe this is all part of his plan as well... O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)14:20:55 No.77268464 ► File: the_grand_magus_by_oneste(.).jpg (170 KB, 1280x1888) >>77258684 (OP) I seek out a place where a great evil or injustice is occurring, and in a moment where I might intervene and prevent it - I stand by and do nothing. In doing so, I fulfil the prophecy, making it a broader metaphor about the evils of inaction. There is no greater enemy of light than the apathetic fool who who allows evil to prosper and succeed. With this done, I avoid a more literal interpretation of the prophecy, and the resulting life of infamy, torment, and inevitable destruction at the hands of the forces of light. O Anonymous 01/30/21(Sat)23:53:04 No.77259502 ► >>77258684 (OP) He'd probably immediately assume corruption in the 'light' and kick off a purge. O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)16:18:09 No.77270255 File: 1806_by_morkardfc_dccr8db-pre.jpg (45 KB, 827x967) >>77258684 (OP) if you are a virtuous man and the world becomes opposed to you, it is the world that is wrong being a cleric means never having to question that clearly this world is destined to fall into such depravity that even "light" becomes a vile thing and by God I am all that stands between the world and that hateful destiny O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)15:09:28 No.77269193 >>77258684 (OP) Take it literally, get put on house arrest at a rural agricultural property with a large dwelling, and then operate a particle accelerator to make some low mass, short lifespan black holes. Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)16:13:45 No.77270167 ► >77270203 >>77258684 (OP) I decide to leave the world at large, get lost in some massive forest or jungle and live out the rest of my life as a hermit O Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)16:15:26 No.77270203 >>77270289 >>77270167 An accident while making a fire lights the forest on fire. An extended period of drought and poor management has left the forest ripe for fire, and within a month nearly a continent of woodland and grassland has been burned away. You did this. You ruined the world. GG O Anonymous 02/01/21(Mon)05:48:17 No.77280160 ► "Oi wots this c--- sayin'? Oi'll neveh turn on ingerland and the queen'?" Anonymous 01/31/21(Sun)18:25:34 No.77272227 > >>77258684 (OP) I start going after every light source I can. I blow every candle, shatter every lantern, douse every fire and smother every torch. Long as I live, no light shall shine upon the land.

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Anon gives the wholesome truth

File: Best persona girl.jpg (982 KB, 2592x1456) O Anonymous 12/16/18(Sun)21:23:23 No.63564123 >>63564230 >>63564233 >>63564258 >>63564285 >>63564575 >>63566145 >>63567774 >>63568235 >>63568628 >Put effort into designing an NPC >Party doesn't care >Invent an NPC on the fly >They love it Why is this always the case? TALK Newspaper Club Member O Anonymous 12/16/18(Sun)21:32:06 No.63564230 >>63564253 >>63564273 >>63564682 >>63566041 >>63568189 >>63568255 >>6356 >>63564123 (OP) Because Npc on the fly are made with nothing but yourself. Why do you think your group like them. Because they're your friend, and they want to be with you, not anyone else.

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idk what to call this

[Return] [Catalog) (Bottom] [Update) (0 Auto) File: IMG_20210205_012049170.jpg (1.07 MB, 2592x1944) O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)17:24:52 No.77350540 >>77350752 >>77350877 >>77350981 >>77351052 >>77351082 >>77351221 >>77361339 >>77362520 >>77352625 >>77352659 >>77352667 >>77353312 >>77353366 Hey /tg/, remember when I posted that I was talked into basically crossdressing as a dragonbom? Well I'm still likely months off it, but here's a progress pic as promised. Still need the clothes and mask but it's started O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)17:36:32 No.77350752 >>77350540 (OP) Snine on you crazy bastard. O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)17:43:09 No.77350877 ► >>77350540 (OP) Thanks OP.I dIant particularly need to sleep tonight. O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)17:44:29 No.77350907► Get it >>O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)17:48:09 No.77350981 File: blelf.png (113 KB, 398x389) Ne bh >>77350540 (OP) >months oti >ain't even got the skeen culla n---- you a LONG way from dragonborn, more like draggin yo ass O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)17:51:08 No.77351052 >>77350540 (OP) Based and redpiied. O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)17:52:41 No.77351082 File: 1609770120530.jpg (77 KB, 770x887) >>77350540 (OP) SHey tg, remember when I posted that I was talked into basically crossdressing as a dragonbom? No, but I know now. O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)17:53:21 No.77351098 Unfuckingbelievable this place I'm speechless >>O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)18:00:28 No.77351221 >>77350540 (OP) >ihose t--- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LDCOlI3Rwww (Embed] O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)18:06:10 No.77351339 >>77350540 (OP) Absolule f------ legend O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)19:15:37 No.77352466 I believe in you, OP. Aim for the sky. O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)19:18:50 No.77352520 >>77350540 (OP) mpressively based OP, but you've got a long way to go you also need to fix those t--- O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)19:25:29 No.77352625 >>77350540 (OP) Sremember wheni posted that I was talked into basically crossdressing as a dragonbom? Archive link. Now. I need context. O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)19:27:58 No.77352659 >77353432 File: jeremy-irons-D-and-D.gif (503 KB, 492x318) >>77350540 (OP) F----- go for it anon, don't let your memes be dreams. Continue the of legacy tg/ being /d/ite. O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)19:28:26 No.77352667 >>77350540 (OP) but here's a progress pic as promised What progress? It's literally just you in a morphsuit with a stuff bra Imao O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)20:08:01 No.77353312 >>77350540 (OP Go OP! O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)20:11:16 No.77353366 >>77353439 >>77350540 (OP) KYMiag anon here, should I upload this? O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)20:14:14 No.77353429 It's just a fursuit. >>O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)20:14:19 No.77353432 >>77352659 T can't waten this and not think "YES! I JUST S--- MYSELF!" *O Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)20:14:54 No.77353439 ► >>77353366 (You) F--- it, imma just go ahead

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The Girls Try and Play FATAL

NSFW

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The Book of Weeaboo Fightan Magic

DUNGEONS ORAGONS Tome of Banle The BOOKOF Weaboo Fightan Magic Richand Baker, Frank Brunner, Joseph Carriker, Jr.

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God of Anus

NSFW

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Roll for Anal Circumference

ROLL FOR A--- CIRCUMFERENCE

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The Omegle Crusades: Princess Luna Buys a Used Camel

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The Omegle Crusades: Marriage Counselling

yomegle Crusade The omegle Talk to strangers! You're chatting with a random stranger on Omeglel You and the stranger both like Role Play. Stranger: (23 F Linda. Long dark hair, brown eyes, 5'6, 11Olbs, South Korean. Looking for a man in this dramatic and romantic role play that can get sexual if there's enough of a build up. You will also be 23 so there's no real point in giving me your age.) We got married very young, 18. And quickly we had a baby boy named Connor. Unfortunately, Connor was born with some major health problems. Last year he passed away at the age of 3. Ever since then we've been fighting almost weekly. And not just normal arguments either, plates are thrown and we're screaming until the wee hours of the morning. Well that's what's happening tonight. It's almost 4am and we've been screaming since 10pm. It started out as a little argument about doing laundry and now it's an epic battle. I'm wearing a pink negligee with a matching silk robe and you yell something at me. I respond with a loud. "I want a divorce!" You: "WELL I WANT TO GO ON AN ADVENTURE, M-----------." You: "LET'S GO ON AN EPIC QUEST." You: "LINDA, I CAN SHOW YOU THE WORLD." You: "SHINING, SHIMMERING SPLENDOUR." Stranger: OH MY GOD I THINK I LOVE YOU You: "TELL ME LINDA, WHEN DID YOU LAST LET YOUR HEART DECIDE, M-----------?!" Stranger:I LOVE THAT MOVIE You:I DO TO You: JUST LIKE I LOVE YOU You: LET'S NOT BE HASTY, DON'T DIVORCE ME MY LOVE Stranger: OKAY Stranger: LET'S HAVE A THREESOME You: WE'LL REPLACE CONNOR. WE SHALL HAVE ANOTHER, MIGHTY SON You: BY THE NAME OF CONNOR Mkll Stranger: WO000000 You: HE SHALL BE A REAL MAN, OF MANLY PROPORTIONS You: AND HE SHALL HAVE YOUR EYES, MY DARLING You: YOUR BEAUTIFUL, SULTRY "F--- ME" EYES Stranger: AND ONE DAY HE SHALL MURDER EVIL M------------ You: YES You: YES HE SHALL You: AND ON THAT DAY WE SHALL BE PROUD Stranger: INDEED WE SHALL You: BECAUSE CONNOR WAS ONLY HIS LAST NAME You: SECRETLY HE WAS CALLED JOHN You: AND HE SAVED THE WORLD ONCE MORE You: AND IT WAS ALL DOWWN TO US You: NOW FORGIVE ME LINDA, FOR I MUST GO BACK TO THE FUTURE Stranger: SAY HELLO TO THE WHALEMINGOS FOR ME You:I SHALL, BUT OH, IT SHALL NEVER BE THE SAME WITHOUT YOU MY DEAR Stranger:I WILL JOIN YOU ONE DAY You: HOW WILL I KNOW IT TO BE YOU? FOR I HAVE BEEN BLIND ALL THESE YEARS, AND HAVE FORGOTTEN YOUR USERNAME Stranger: YOU SHALL KNOW. OUR HANDS WILL TOUCH AND THE SPARKS WILL IGNITE. WE WILL BE UNITED FOREVER. You: KINKY, I LIKE IT You: ALL RIGHT, TATTY BYE Stranger: CIAO You:IAM GOING TO DISCONNECT NOW, DISCONNECT FROM THE PAST AND TRANSCEND TO THE FUTURE! Stranger: TILL WE MEET AGAIN MY LOVE You: AU REVOIR, MON PETIT CHOUCHOU You have disconnected.

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The Omegle Crusades: Duel of the Rock Gods

yomegle Crusade! The omegle Talk to strangers! You're chatting with a random stranger on Omegle! You both like roleplaying. You: THE DRAGON MORDENTHRAX IS PILLAGING THE COUNTRYSIDE FOR BITCHES AND BLOW! ARE YOU A BAD ENOUGH DUDE TO STOP HIM?!?! Stranger: HELL YEAH!!! You: F------ SWEET! LET'S DO THIS! *Jumps in the saddle of a mechanical horse and plays a sweet guitar riff* You: BOW-NANANA-BOWWOWWOW!! Stranger: S---, FORGOT MY BATTLE AXE You: WHAT THE EFF, BRAH!? You: WHATEVER! I GOTS A SPARE!!! You: *Tosses you a spare 'axe', complete with quicksilver strings and frets of threats* You: ARE YOU READY ROCK?!?!?! Stranger:I WAS BORN READY Stranger: LETS F--- HIS DRAGON S--- UP You: WORD TO YA MUTHA!! *Revs engine of iron horse and rides off, splitting the air with an epic solo that makes the earth scream* Stranger: TO BATTLE *jumps on mechanical donkey, clops along after you) You: HERE BRAH!! *tosses you a leather beltpouch brim-full of fine white powder." You: IT'LL KEEP YA ROCKIN' ALL NIGHT! AND WE'LL NEED TO IF WE'RE GONNA STEAL THAT DRAGON'S BLOW!!! Stranger: SOUNDS GOOD TO ME*snorts handful of powder, can taste colors* You: WOOOO!!! THAT'S THE S--- I'M TALKING ABOUT!!! *The sky opens and a dozen shrieking Thrashdemons pour from the heavens, playing a sick harmony of diabolical epic-ness. They descend upon us in mosh-like fervour* You: S--- DUDE! TIME TO SHOW ME YOUR СНOPS! Stranger: ITS GO TIME*shreds an epic solo that would make Dio himself weep* Stranger: *pure epicness melts their faces* You: F--- YEA! MORDENTHRAX IS F-----!!! Stranger: THAT F----- DOESNT KNOW WHATS COMING FOR HIS BITCH ASS You: *As you celebrate his imminent demise a great blot forms in the sky. MORDENTHRAX, the Metal Beast, Player of a thousand solo's and Bane of Groupies, appears in the boiling sky, with his own flaming axe gouting lightning and molten cocaine.* You: *YOU FOOLS DARE CHALLENGE I?!?! THE MOST BITCHIN' OF METAL-DRAGONS!?!?!* You: *LET ME SHOW YOU THE POWER OF THESE SICK FLOOO00000OWWWSS!* *Let's forth a riff that sunders mountains and evaporates oceans. The illest of tunage that forces tears from the eyes of Gods* Stranger:I CALL UPON THE GODS OF ROCK TO AID US IN THIS BATTLE!! HENDRIX, PINK FLOYD, LED ZEPPELIN, DIO, CLAPTON HEAR MY PLEA FOR THE MOST AWESOME OF AWESOME SOLOS Stranger: *ground opens up, flaming "axe" rises from the schism* You: *YOUR PALTRY SHOWTUNES ARE NO MATCH FOR ! !! WHO HAVE CONSUMED THE HEART OF ROCK AND ROLL AND BREATHED THE BLACKNESS INTO BLACK METAL!!* You: *From the ground he conjures a quartet of Rockbeasts, armed with backup instruments. Together they form an accompaniment to his fiendish thrashing* You: DON'T WORRY, BRAH! I KNOW SOME TRICKS MYSELF! *With my axe l call forth our own quartet of ghostly musicians, those who gave their souls of Rock, and they do battle against the Rockbeasts. Thunder and Hail are thrown too and fro as the two groups wage conflict beneath us* Stranger: HE IS TOO POWERFUL FOR ONE SOLO ALONE, WE MUST UNITE OUR EPIC SOLOES TO DEFEAT HIM You: THEN LET WHAT WE DO TODAY- *summons a fork of lightning forth from my Axe as I wham out a quick break* -ECHO FOREVER THROUGH HISTORY!!! Stranger: FOR VALHALLA *summon a gout of flame from my axe* You: *Our flame and lightning intertwine and strike Mordenthrax full in his steel breastbone. He is singed, but angry now!* *YOU ARE FLIES!! BITING AT THE FLESH OF A MORTAL GO-0OODDD!!!!* You: *He plays a single bar that rips a cleft of raw earth from the ground, forming a protective barrier in front of himself* Stranger: WE MUST STRIKE DOWN THE BARRIER BEFORE WE CAN SLAY THE BEAST You: TOO F-----' EASY!! *With a few chords I create a mock-dragon; a skeletal shape of crackling indigo plasma* HE'S GOT FORM, NOW GIVE HIM LIFE!!! Stranger: BROTHERS OF ROCK, I CALL YOU TO ROCK ONCE MORE *use a sick riff to summon the souls of rockers past to inhabit the steel beast* You: NOW GO FORTH AND DIEEEE!!!! *The screaming beast roars a challenge and hurtles headlong into the earthen wall; shattering it to pieces before flying into the startled face of Mordenthrax and engaging in bloody claw-to-claw combat!!* Stranger: QUICK!!!WHILE HES DISTRACTED, STRIKE HIM DOWN!!! Stranger: *begin shredding furiously, a non-stop stream of flame erupting from my axe You: *My lightning accompanies your fires, and an otherworldly symphony of sound erupts from the earth and heavens as the twin dragons make war against the most epic of soundtracks!!* Stranger: *all the forces merge into a cluster f--- of destruction and music, creating a second big bang* You: *As the pure awesome-ness of the scene merges all existence into a singularity Mordenthrax bellows a final challenge to us* "MORTAL PRETENDERS!!! YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE LAST OF MEEEEeee...* You: *And as the chaos erupts around us I light a c-------- and flip on my shades before blinking out of reality* THAT CALLS FOR AN ENCO- Stranger: -RE!!! YOU SAID IT BRAH, LETS GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT You: *Blinks back into existence, face smeared with cocaine* COME HEAVEN OR HELL, LET'S RO- 000000CK!!! You: SHΑΝΑΝΑΝΑΝΑΝΑΝΑΝΑ DOO00OM RIDAAAAAHНННННН!!! Stranger: *scene fades to black as we play* You: Wicked, brah. Most fun I've had on this s------- website for a minute. You: You wouldn't be a fa/tg/uy, would you? Stranger: im not entirely sure what that means You: Then it's fair to assume you're not. You: At any rate. That was cool. I'll save this convo and re-read it in good health. Keep rockin' brah. You have disconnected.

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The Omegle Crusades: Brogan Returns

yomegle Crusade! The omegle Talk to strangers! You're chatting with a random stranger on Omegle! You and the stranger both Ilke Roleplaying. Stranger: (I am Peyton, I have long brown hair, green eyes, I am skinny but kinda Busty, I am in legging and a baggy sweatshirt. With makeup on. (Role idea): We are bestfriends, but then something changed it all. About two years later you come to my apartment and want to talk to me..(take it from there if you wanna do this one. Give brief description) (PS: This can get sexual but doesnt have to) You: reading You: Sexual is fine, btw. I'm open. Stranger: Alright(: You: (Goes by the nickname B. Very tall, extremely muscular and fit. Has long blonde hair and cold blue eyes.) I look down at the shorter woman standing in the open doorway. "Hello" I greeted her. Stranger: "What are you doing here?". I asked a's I opened the door You: "I have something important to tell you" I said, taking a step forward. Stranger:I looked nervous,"Alright come in) You:I shut the door behind me. "They're coming for me; we're running out of time." Stranger: "who's coming for you?" You: "Orcs." I replied as a thunderous rampage sounded outside. The flimsy door was already giving way to their banging. I ripped off my clothes revealing my loincloth and boots, and readied my trusty greatsword. "READY YOURSELF, FRIEND. FOR TODAY, BROGAN FIGHTS FOR THE BOTH OF US." Stranger: "That's why they make locks on doors" she showed sarcasicly a's she locked her dooer You: The orcs broke through the flimsy lock, and began pouring into the room, roughly grabbing at Peyton, their breath rancid like rotted meat, filth slung onto their armor and weapons. I stabbed one roughly through the eye, releasing its grip from the girl. "I'VE GOT MY EYE ON YOU, FOOL." Your conversational partner has disconnected. omegle Talk to strangers! You're chatting with a random stranger on Omeglel You and the stranger both Ilike roleplaying. Stranger: [Eve. 19. Brunette, green eyes, curvy, 34C, firm ass, naval pierced and a heart tattoo at the small of my back.] My father has sent me to you to take care of far too many times. It's come to a point that I thought I have two father. You're my father's oldest and closest friend. You recently got out of your short term marriage with a younger female. My father once again has sent me to your place after he decided that he needed to go overseas for a week. I arrive at your doorstep in a pair of white shorts and blue tank top. I knock on your door as I set my bag on the floor. [Please be descriptive, we're very close, short description of yourself, if you'd like, you could be a little dominant and please continue. Also, sorry if you can't see me typing.] You: reading You: (Goes by the nickname B, very tall, ridiculously well built, blonde hair down to shoulders. Currently wearing a tight white t- shirt and blue jeans.) You: "Back already? Come inside." I say to the young girl standing in my doorway. Stranger:I smile, "Sorry my dad didn't stop to say hi. He claimed that he's late." I shake my head, bringing my bag inside. "How are you? It's been ages since I last saw you." You: "Fine." I say, leading her to the kitchen. I point to a few maps. "take a look at this" I say. Stranger:I lean forward, squinting my eyes. "You know, I'm never good at geography. What is that?" | ask. You: "That's my house. Where the orcs will attack." I say, and rip off my clothes, revealing my loincloth and boots as green skinned monsters pour inside. I ready a claymore in one hand, an axe in the other. "BUT FEAR NOT, BROGAN SHALL FIGHT BESIDE YOU TODAY." You: With a mighty swing, a dire fly that one was riding was cleaved in twain. "DON'T FLY OFF THE HANDLE, CUR." Your conversational partner has disconnected. omegle Talk to strangers! You're chatting with a random stranger on Omegle! You and the stranger both lke roleplaying, and Rp. Stranger: I Am your company's biggest threat your mission was to take me and bring me back to your company . You have been looking for me all over the place and are about to go home after a long day when you see me walking down a dark ally (my names is Scarlett Antoinette, F19 21 in the roleplay, I have long wavy blonde hair and crystal blue eyes with bright blood red lips my most recognizable trait. I'm wearing a black jumpsuit a gun in my waistband, very sexually tense relationship but no actual activity until later) You: reading You: Tall, extremely heavily built man with shoulder length blonde hair and blue eyes. Wears a tight white tee shirt and blue jeans, carries a duffel bag. Stranger: Continue please Oh and first and last name ? You: Goes by the nickname "B". Can't use real names in corporate espionage, you know? Stranger: I understand You: "You! Get back here, I just want to talk!" I yelled in a deep voice, spotting the woman I was after. Stranger:I smirk and turn around "Why hello Mr.B" You: "There is no time. We must leave soon." I said, approaching closer. Stranger: "Ah-ah you do realize your Hunting me" | raise an eyebrow You: "No. Not hunting you; we're bait." I said, ripping off my clothes and revealing a loincloth and boots. I gripped the greatsword from my bag, as a horde of bloodthirsty orcs streamed in from both sides of the alley. "BRACE YOURSELF WENCH. FOR TODAY, ONLY THROUGH BROGAN SHALL YOU LIVE." I shouted, and punched an Orc so hard it entered its abdomen. Entrails streamed out behind it. "NO GUTS, NO GLORY, CUR." Your conversational partner has disconnected.

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The Omegle Crusades: Actually Role Playing as a Doctor

yomegle Crusade The Somegle Talk to strangers! You're chatting with a random stranger on Omegle! You and the stranger both like Roleplaying. Stranger: I'm patient your doctor Stranger: (Note: patient is a slut) You: You there! you, with the blood everywhere! I hope you don't expect me to clean that up. Now what's wrong with you- as if I don't have enough problems to deal with! Stranger:I was on my way home from work when I got into a minor car crash and I think I have a concussion You: Well godammit, don't just stand there! Get on the bloody table! Stranger: Ok * bites lip You: Where does it flipping hurt? Stranger: My head You: Then you should have bally-well worn a helmet, shouldn't you? Hold this icepack to your addlebrained noggin while I fetch some bandages. You: This is going to sting more than it strictly speaking needs to. Stranger: Ok * quickly unbuttons exposing cleavage You: There, bandages in hand. Now for some disinfectant- not that that'll help much, with you in that state. Did you get run over into some garbage cans? But I digress. Stranger: No I was cut off by some douchebag and swirled right into a field You: Probably serves you right! Now I'm going to shine a very bright light into your eyes, just for the hell of it. Maybe it will help me decide whether or not you need invasive surgery. You: How do you feel? You:I can see your bloody retinas like this. Stranger: Better with such a handsome man around You:I hope you don't mean Old Bill the f------ doctor's skeleton, because I don't treat mental illness in this clinic, you loony. You: Now the other eye. Stranger: I'm talking about you silly! Stranger: Doctor something else hurts You: What is it this time? Stranger: My right breast Stranger: Can you please check it out You:I recommend immediate amputation. You: But l'll take a look just to be sure. You: Hmmm. You: Yep, amputation. Stranger: AHHHHHH DOCTOR You: Ha ha, just kidding, it's probably breast cancer. Stranger: WHAT ARE YOU DOING You: When was your last mammogram? Stranger: Idk 2-4 years ago You: Cancer for sure. Stranger: Can you also check for vaginal cancer? Stranger: Please You: You don't get cancer in your f------ vagina, you get it in your c-----. What you're feeling in your dank folds is probably some horrible, horrible venereal disease. Like syphilis. I recommend an oinment. You: Or an ointment, if you prefer to spell properly. Stranger: How about I check your penis to make sure everything's correct down their? Stranger: What do ya say Stranger: Babe You: Are you a f------ urinologist? Because I strongly suspect your are not in fact a urinologist. So no. Stranger: I've had lots of experience with penises though Stranger: If you know what I mean You: Miss, I'm sure you have. I did mention the venereal disease, yes? Stranger: Yes Stranger: How about I give you a quickie and then we can just go on with our lives You: I'm afraid your insurance doesn't cover that, miss. Stranger: Is it possible that we can make an exception? You: And risk bloody malpractice? Not for your manky hole, no. I DID mention the venereal disease, yes? Stranger: Gets up and stomps out of the room Stranger: Trips and falls down the stairs and breaks her neck Stranger: END SCENE You: Get back in here you horrible trollop, I can hear your bones breaking! You have disconnected.

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/tg/ - is being a servitor really that bad

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