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Masters of the Universe

830 Views • Created 2 years ago By AceAttorney9000 • Updated 2 years ago

Created By AceAttorney9000 • Updated 2 years ago

TLIID Super-villain secret origins - Skeletor by Nick-Perks

THE INSULT THAT MADE A MONSTER OUT OF "MAX" LOOK MAXTOR! ANOTHER MUSCLE MAN IS TRYING TO LIFT THE HAVOK STAFF! DON'T YOU WISH I COULD LIFT THE HAVOK STAFF, ΤΕENA? WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT HUMAN SKELETON, TEENA? WHEN WILL YOU GET A REAL MAN LIKE ME? SHUT UP YOU BRUTE OR I'LL... I'LL... GET LOST! "MAXTOR"? HA-HA! YOU SHOULD BE CALLED "SKELETOR"! MAXTOR! FORGET IT! YOU DON'T NEED TO PROVE ANYTHING TO ME! I'M TIRED OF BEING PUSHED AROUND! THIS ANCIENT TOME SAYS IT CAN MAKE ME A REAL MAN IF I'M WILLING TO PAY A PRICE... I'LL GAMBLE A CHANT! IT'S WORKING - I FINALLY HAVE THE BODY I'VE DREAMED OF! BUT MY FACE IS BECOMING SHRUNKEN -SKELETAL... NO MATTER! HA-HA-HA! NOW I CAN LIFT THE HAVOK STAFF ONE-HANDED! OH MAXTOR! YOU FOOL! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?? I'M NO LONGER THAT WEAKLING MAXTOR - I AM SKELETOR! AND THIS THUG WILL BE THE FIRST TO KNOW MY VENGEANCE! NOO! Let DEMONIC TENSION make YOU A NEW MAN! Are you "fed up" with seeing the huskies walk off with the best of everything? Sick then you want a quick, easy way to put on and tired of being soft, frail, skinny or flabby - ONLY HALF ALIVE? Do you want power - real power - the power to crush your enemies? To grind them beneath your heel as their women weep? Do you want the strength to wield the Havok Staff - the most powerful weapon known to man? Do you want a legion of toadying super-villains at your beck and call, obeying your every command, no matter how often your schemes may fail? Conquer the known world! Are you willing to make sacrifices for your Feed on destruction and chaos! ambition - to become hideous, monstrous, Spread terror and pain! feared by all mankind? Do you have the self-loathing necessary to turn your back on everything good in your life? If the answer to these questions is "Yes" muscle without having to make any effort. You certainly don't want to do any exercise, and who can blame you - it's boring as hell. And speaking of hell, this is where our new "Demonic Tension" comes in! Simply removing the unhealthy, fat-making 'soul' frees up the body to pile on pounds of muscular demonic power! Simply sign here in a small quantity of your own blood: WORLD DOMINATION! No take backs. Slaughter millions! Collect action figures without fear of criticism! Additional minor physical alterations may occur involving a skull-like appearance and/or a bluish hue to the skin. May be defeated by He-Man.
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Masters of the Universe

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