: Anonymous (ID: 7zitKDez) 09/22/21(Wed)11:18:48 No.340271583 >you take a loạn for 3k >don't pay it >lose credit score, lose your house, lose your belongings, lose your job, get garnished and arrested %24 123R haha money printer go brrrr 57 KB JPG >US GOV takes out Thirty Trillion loan (30,000,000,000,000) >don't pay it back >lol ill just raise the ceiling so i dont have to pay it lol When are THEY gonna come collect from the US?

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Anonymous 139 KB JPG 12/19/24(Thu)15:28:13 No.928849473 >Be Rose >Throw away a priceless jewel worth hundreds of millions of dollars >Could have made her family financially secure for generations but says no for le epic symbolism >Reminisces about the man that saved her, but also hogs the floating door like a selfish pig, killing him. (Watch the Mythbusters episode) This is one of the greatest love stories ever told? Dude, Rose is a f------ bitch.

Anonymous (ID: 9Mc0Hnwf 12/19/24(Thu)15:49:03 No.491828169 1.94 MB JPG >sells your gold reserves >basically completely crashes your economy >Canadian dollar crashes >tells leafs to anhero with suicide pods if they get too sick >imports 6 gorillion pajeets to fight over a single Tim Horton's >gets offended when basically only neighbor that has been decent says they would be better off annexed Why leafs? Why?

: Anonymous 05/26/22(Thu)13:13:15 No.68790277 196 KB PNG >Go on omegle >say im interested in politics >match up >ask them about their political opinion >take the radical extreme opposite of the answer >get them riled up >write a question of catalogues >they type for over 2 minutes >disconnect before they can send me their shittext 4 victims today

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Anon’s mom had a hard time after the divorce | /r/Greentext

>Be me 13 year old anon, dad left for a younger version of my mom >I think it was a huge shock. Came out of nowhere. She didn't fight him on the property settlement or anything. >He did alright. Ended up in a bigger house. Mom couldn't afford our old 22 KB JPG house. She ended up in a cheap apartment complex >Used to go over to my dad's, but my stepmom had a baby. So I don't get invited as much. Mostly stay with my mom. >I tried to be there for mom. But she needed more than I could give. >Dating was tough. Mom didn't have a lot of time and money to spend on herself. She was always pretty to me, but looking back I get why it was hard for her. >She ended up with guys who would sleep with her for a while. I guess she made it easy and hoped they would stay. They just used her. >lt used to make me mad. But I was a kid. >l'd meet them at breakfast. Just like we're meeting now. So you and I are a lot alike. >Anyway, I'm the guy who came in your mom

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Anon takes their shot | /r/Greentext

File: 301019862047211.png (181 KB, 390x389) Anonymous 09/21/21(Tue)10:54:08 No.863521600 >>863521669 >>863521907 >>863 >Be me >Kinda fancy a girl >Have a dream about her where I fall in love >Feels so real.jpg| >Wake up >Feel like crap >A few hours later >Have a revelation >"| should just ask her out" >NOTHING CAN STOP ME >Go back home >Message her >Still hasn't opened And here we are now. Is this fate? Am I stupid? So many emotions ahhhhhh. Anonymous 09/21/21(Tue)10:55:43 No.863521669 >>863521600 (OP) You're in love anon, enjoy! Also, checkd

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No fatties in the kiddie pool | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/21/21(Tue)14:16:14 No.863530051 > Take toddler to local pool > playing in the kiddie pool for kids age 2-5 > hear a noise SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP > this f----- fat p------------, probably between 10 or 12 is lumbering towards the pool > I mean, this kid has to be like, 200 pounds already > with this idiotic, gleeful look on his face he just belly flops into the water >I grab my 2 year old out of the way just in time to avoid getting crushed beneath his wobbling, gelatinous bulk > "HEY YOU FAT F---, WATCH WHERE YOUR GOING, YOUR FATASS JUST ALMOST KILLED MY KID" > He bursts into big, fat, slobbery tears because I called him fat > his mom and dad come waddling up, they are both morbidly obese as well, easily 300 pounds each > they demand I apologize to their son for calling him fat > I tell them that the kiddie pool is for toddlers, not a refuge for escaped livestock and to gtfo of my face > get banned from the pool > no regrets

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Instant Buyer’s Remorse | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Why is life so cruel frens? 09/20/21(Mon)21:41:26 No.65461769 >be me 4/10 18 overweight >decide i will sell my soul to the devil >google how do i sell my soul to the devil? >print 5 pages on how to do the ritual >when the time comes I decide to sell it for a gf >ohshit.jpg 113 KB JPG >late for work again >get to work and immediatly take a vape break cause autism >contemplate if i should drink the mop cleaner tonight so i can finally die >phone buzzes >qt 3.14 from class >"hey anon want to get lunch next tuesday just the two of us?" >fuckyeah.zip >work goes fast after that >lay in bed and start to think again >takes a little longer cause autism >mfw i just sold my soul to the devil for a gf A f------ girlfriend how could i have been so retarded frens? she could dump me whenever probably will cause im dumb fml :(

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Anon uses the defecation chair | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/01/21(Tue)14:58:04 No.855843594 Sorry for bad englang >be me >belly location having pressure >pain >on the defecation chair >large movement 45 KB JPG >pressure gone Mfw

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Anon sees a girl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/21/21(Tue)19:39:08 No.863546656 >Walk into your bedroom >You find Belle Delphine on your bed Wat do??? 74 KB JPG 1 Reply / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 09/21/21(Tue)19:40:16 No.863546726 >>863546656 (OP) # NO OFF THE BED GIT 60 KB JPG

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Princess and the frog | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/21/21(Tue)13:05:05 No.65466916 >go on a dinner date for the first time in 9 years >everything goes well, seemingly >she seems to smile a lot though doesn't hold eye contact much >bill comes, I pay >go in for a hug at the end >she pushes me away hard saying 10 KB JPG "don't kiss me" >don't know what to say, don't know what to do, just stand there speechless, I didn't even try to kiss her Holy f--- it's over

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Too Close For Comfort | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/21/21(Tue)00:13:27 No.65462742 >be me >tall and skinny guy >not exactly handsome >a few days ago in the mall with my sisters >walking behind them cause idk they're talking >I hear a woman a few feet away saying 7 KB PNG "What is that guy doing so close to the girls? >other woman says "I hope nothing bad" >mfw I realize that I look so weird that people think I'm a stalker

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Pigs on the wing | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/21/21(Tue)13:14:41 No.65467011 What would people think if they could hear your inner monologue? >at work as cashier, standing there and waiting for customers >inside my head though: >visualizing a fat girl on her knees, she's grabbing her big ass cheeks 267 KB PNG and spreading them. I'm looking at her hairy p----, she's farting >"gimme some gas you fat pig, yeah keep farting oink oink"

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Anon Wonders About Women | /r/Greentext

AN S | O Anonymous 09/20/21(Mon)22:41:34 No.65460671 ► >>65460721 >>65461027 >>65461052 >>65461071 >girl >starts saying hello and greets me everyday >i start freaking out inside and think that she actually likes me >comes up to me few days ago and asked me if i know who (person with my last name) is >tell her yeah he's my uncle >"he owns (business) right? does he have any positions open there? if he does i would like it if you could recommend me" >realize she was only acting nice and cute to try and use me so she could get a better job >tell her the next day that he isn't hiring >she just looks disappointed and says it's okay >no longer smiles at me and has gone back to avoiding me why are women so mean and manipulative? for once in my like i thought a woman actually liked me but it was all a lie. work i've never spoken to before starts smiling at me when i'm around her

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Anon needs to dominate his wife. Do you think he can? | /r/Greentext

>5 years ago found out that my wife cheated >never knew why, forgave her anyway >yesterday was arguing >she says 'do you know why i cheated'? >why? >because you dont dominate me enough 136 KB GIF >had no idea she wanted this i need help. what should i do to please her? stories of you dominating your wife? 14 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 09/21/21(Tue)14:00:09 No.863529385 not married, but how common is it for women to want to be dominated? is it very common? >>863529583 #

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Take the Chevy to the levee | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/21/21(Tue)12:22:41 No.65466541 >Chronic coomer >Notice barely any c-- after i finish cooming >Realize its time to do nofap >Get to 5 days (longest time ever since I was like 8 years old) before I cant take it anymore 92 KB JPG >Finish >2 or 3 drops of c-- dribble out Its f------ over.

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Greentext Stories - Anon disappears | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous (ID: 7zitKDez) 09/22/21(Wed)11:18:48 No.340271583 >you take a loạn for 3k >don't pay it >lose credit score, lose your house, lose your belongings, lose your job, get garnished and arrested %24 123R haha money printer go brrrr 57 KB JPG >US GOV takes out Thirty Trillion loan (30,000,000,000,000) >don't pay it back >lol ill just raise the ceiling so i dont have to pay it lol When are THEY gonna come collect from the US?

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