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: Anonymous 07/15/19(Mon)20:22:48 No.804713633 >be me >sick and bad mood >make bowl of fresh warm rice >food >feel better >thank u rice 58 KB PNG 6 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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Anonymous 139 KB JPG 12/19/24(Thu)15:28:13 No.928849473 >Be Rose >Throw away a priceless jewel worth hundreds of millions of dollars >Could have made her family financially secure for generations but says no for le epic symbolism >Reminisces about the man that saved her, but also hogs the floating door like a selfish pig, killing him. (Watch the Mythbusters episode) This is one of the greatest love stories ever told? Dude, Rose is a f------ bitch.

Anonymous (ID: 9Mc0Hnwf 12/19/24(Thu)15:49:03 No.491828169 1.94 MB JPG >sells your gold reserves >basically completely crashes your economy >Canadian dollar crashes >tells leafs to anhero with suicide pods if they get too sick >imports 6 gorillion pajeets to fight over a single Tim Horton's >gets offended when basically only neighbor that has been decent says they would be better off annexed Why leafs? Why?

: Anonymous 05/26/22(Thu)13:13:15 No.68790277 196 KB PNG >Go on omegle >say im interested in politics >match up >ask them about their political opinion >take the radical extreme opposite of the answer >get them riled up >write a question of catalogues >they type for over 2 minutes >disconnect before they can send me their shittext 4 victims today

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Anon shows great empathy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/09/18(Tue)10:18:12 No.48594932 >doorbell rings >its a young girl >shes barefoot >she's just staring at me in silence >"what? what do you want?" >she walks away 42 KB PNG What the F--- was that about. Should I be worried? 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 10/09/18(Tue)10:28:53 No.48595087 >"what? what do you want?" why would you say that to a poor clearly abused little girl, have you no heart? 34 KB JPG >>48595095 # : Anonymous 10/09/18(Tue)10:29:39 No.48595095 >>48595087 # Right? Should have grabbed her and show her what real abuse look like, the f------ crybaby.

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Anon and a warm apple pie | /r/Greentext

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Anon is racist | /r/Greentext

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Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/22/21(Fri)17:41:07 No.65861496 >unintentionally did nofap for a week while vacationing at my parents place >actually jerked off because I was legitimately horny, not bored >m----------- now feels like it 148 KB JPG did when I was a kid This nofap stuff might not be totally useless after all..

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Anon gets cucked by an old friend | /r/Greentext

File: d90.jpg (75 KB, 482x427) I Anonymous 10/22/21(Fri)14:35:24 No.865371560 >be me a long time ago, loser teenager >like this girl, but too much of a coward to ask her out >she would never want to be with me, I'm into nerdy s--- like sci-fi >l also have confidence issues because I get bullied in school >one day, this random chad dude comes to town >really interested in me and my life >confronts the bullies and manages to convince the girl to go to a school dance with me >literally the same night as the dance he leaves the town and I never see him again >ffw many years >get rich selling sci-fi books >hire one of the bullies as my personal assistant to rub my success on his face >marry the same girl and have two kids, with another one on the way >when we find out it's a boy, decide to call him after that chad dude >as he grows up, I see he looks exactly like the man he was named after >mfw I realize the chad dude probably never left and my wife had been f------ him for decades without me knowing >mfw I'm George McFly, from 1985's---- movie "Back to the Future"

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Anon tells a cutting joke | /r/Greentext

| File: 1439972638664.png (1.23 MB, 912x905) O Anonymous 05/17/16(Tue)21:54:45 No.28630210 [Reply] >go get haircut >qt hairdresser asks me what kind of cut I want >I tell her one across my wrists will be fine and laugh >she starts crying and runs to the back of the shop why don't normies have any sense of humor? + 3 replies omitted. Click here to view. O Anonymous 05/17/16(Tue)22:53:57 No.28631069 >>28630210 (OP) 10/10 op, hope she killed herself kek

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anon goes on a date | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/23/21(Sat)11:34:58 No.65866865 >be me >get a match on tinder with 8/10 qt >goes on a date with her >smalltalk.mp3 >she asks what is my main goal in life >l answer : " The complete destruction of the state of Israel " 33 KB JPG >doesn't elaborate >leaves >go home and fap to some /h/ s---

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Anon somehow... idk? I'm glad he's happy | /r/Greentext

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Top-tier Late Night comedy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/02/19(Mon)14:00:05 No.120427931 >"Trump being President is like a SQUIRREL riding a skateboard." *image of squirrel photoshopped onto skateboard appears, audience laughs* >"It's entertaining for a few minutes, but then you start to wonder how the F--- it got there!" 48 KB JPG *audience explodes into laughter and applause* *Oliver turns to image of squirrel* >"That's not a good way to find nuts, Chirpy. Get a real job, you're parents are worried!" *camera cuts to man in audience wearing a squirrel costume and holding a skateboard as he gives Oliver the middle finger and walks off, audience gives standing ovation*

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Anon is in a movie | /r/Greentext

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Never ever make friends at work | /r/Greentext

1• #766588468 4/21/18, 11:52 PM Just got fired from my job of 5 years. > meet new guy, seems pretty cool > eventually learn he's into memes so we share a few > a couple weeks ago I share with him a moonman song > "I'm killing n------, I'm killing n------ (Please stop)" > he laughs > next day after the weekend i find out he reported me to our boss > he's black > tells me to get my s--- and leave

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Anon reads his life’s terms and conditions | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/02/21 (Mon)16:57:07 No.860215884 >Read 314 pages of terms and conditions >Clicked 'disagree' 1.09 MB GIF

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Greentext Stories - Anon likes rice | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 07/15/19(Mon)20:22:48 No.804713633 >be me >sick and bad mood >make bowl of fresh warm rice >food >feel better >thank u rice 58 KB PNG 6 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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