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File: 1615102934985.png (115 KB, 640x646) Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)20:29:00 No.872139250 >5 years ago >i just turned 16 >parents are having a birthday party for me >they want me to bake the cake >i say yes >start making cake >get random boner >im home alone so i dont even bother going to the bathroom >j------- in the kitchen >blow massive load into cake batter >pretend its egg whites and mix it in >bake my j--- cake for the party ffw to party >about 5-6 friends came over, one was a girl >all brought cool presents >i wanted to have cake quickly so people wouldnt notice the smell of baked semen >finally we get to the cake >somebody notices a weird smell >i say its just the stinky friend cause he came over >my parents start cutting slices of my signature c-- cake >my friends all take a bite >they like it, one even said the texture is impeccable >party continues like nothing happened >im never caught >now every time i call my friends jizzgarglers its the truth and that, fellow /b/tards is how to troll your friends

Anon bakes a cake | /r/Greentext


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Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack
Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #
34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps
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File: 1615102934985.png (115 KB, 640x646) Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)20:29:00 No.872139250 >5 years ago >i just turned 16 >parents are having a birthday party for me >they want me to bake the cake >i say yes >start making cake >get random boner >im home alone so i dont even bother going to the bathroom >j------- in the kitchen >blow massive load into cake batter >pretend its egg whites and mix it in >bake my j--- cake for the party ffw to party >about 5-6 friends came over, one was a girl >all brought cool presents >i wanted to have cake quickly so people wouldnt notice the smell of baked semen >finally we get to the cake >somebody notices a weird smell >i say its just the stinky friend cause he came over >my parents start cutting slices of my signature c-- cake >my friends all take a bite >they like it, one even said the texture is impeccable >party continues like nothing happened >im never caught >now every time i call my friends jizzgarglers its the truth and that, fellow /b/tards is how to troll your friends

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Uploaded Feb 06, 2022 at 02:26PM EST

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Greentext Stories

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