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: Anonymous 11/06/17(Mon)06:20:58 No.750195751 >be me >24yo femanon >meet guy off tinder >he's super cute >possiblebf.jpeg >he suggests we go to mcdonalds >wants to meet at 1:30pm sharp 334 KB PNG >i show up at 1:30 and he says hi >he's in his mcdonalds uniform eating a big mac meal >"i get a free medium meal on my break, so how are you?" >i order a big mac meal and we chat >at 1:50, he says he wants to show me something cool out back >we go out back and he starts kissing me >we have sex >"s--- anon, i needed that. i'm going on a date-date tonight with this hot black girl and i dont wanna nut in her too soon" >at 1:58, he clocks back in and i go home >mfw

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon has an obsessive mom | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/22/20(Thu)12:22:20 No.60581964 >21 years of my mom taking me to doctors trying to figure out what's wrong with me >keeps hinting to doctors that I have autism >keeps trying to show me movies and books with autistic people in them to get me to understand that 24 KB JPG I'm autistic >sends me to a school for autists and learning disabilities >doctor diagnoses me with PTSD >mom gets diagnosed with autism Anyone else know this feel? : Anonymous 10/22/20(Thu)12:24:04 No.60581979 >>60581964 >ah the ol switcheroo nice plot twist

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anon loses his virginity | /r/Greentext

>be me >order chinese food >qt 3.14 works there dark brown hair b------- petite build great ass >go to pick up food >she rings up my order and hands it to me 17 KB JPG >wishlcouldfuckyourbrainsout.mov >say thank you and leave >get home and start eating food >notice long ass dark brown hair in food >eat the hair anyways >basically had a girl inside me >later virgins

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Anon gets trolled | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)13:08:36 No.64158138 >be brain >chilling in some dude's head >he fell asleep wait check this out >AYO WE'RE FALLING BRO >jumpscare.exe >Imao go back to sleep dumbass 52 KB JPG

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Every soul has it's dark | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/21/22(Mon)10:12:18 No.67873822 >be me >talking about Elden Ring the other day, mention it's a new franchise by a company that made a game series I used to play but I wasn't 100% sold on the new one yet >fast forward today >gf tells me she wants to buy a video 144 KB JPG game >weird, my gf hates video games >opens up microsoft store and shows me Elden Ring >roll my eyes >"yeah I saw this game on TikTok, it looks really cool" >yeah, you know this game is really hard right? and you don't play video games... >"it can't be that bad..." >it's going to be pretty rough, you should try to play Dark Souls first to get a feel for it and see if you like that style of game >she starts throwing a tantrum about how men are controlling and she just wants to enjoy the story >try and calmly explain that she won't be able to enjoy the story if she cannot progress through the game >she is literally freaking the f--- out >"YOU JUST WANT TO PLAY IT FIRST" >I literally do not give a s--- about this game but if you're going to play it I might as well go ahead and buy it, yeah >"NO, YOU JUST WANT TO PLAY IT FIRST" do women not understand the concept of "difficulty" and wasting money or am I missing something what did I do wrong here f------

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Anon becomes parts of Netflix documentary | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/22/18(Wed)01:29:11 No.47665686 074e7c5b-329e-49d7-b555-91929a374b37.jpg 57 KB JPG >be me >Watching Netflix health documentary >"haha fat people" >They're filming fatties in the street >"hey, I have that shirt" >"hey, I have those cargo shorts" >"hey, I know that building" >mfw 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 08/22/18(Wed)01:31:06 No.47665705 so dont be fat you fat idiot

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The legendary comebacks of fatticus | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/17/22(Thu)08:12:05 No.65941068 uhoh.png 546 KB PNG >watch Spartacus with my gf >now she keeps grabbing my belly and saying things like >"You won't be a god of the arena with these rolls!" >"I don't think Gannicus ate chocolate for dinner" >"If you were in Spartacus you'd be called Fattiatus' >keeps sending me links to 'gladiator diet' and 'gladiator workout' etc >tried sexy talking to her like in Spartacus to turn her on >took off her bra and said "Pleasant Milk for Noble Asher" >she got creeped out and said 'it doesn't work when you do it'

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Anon wants to be a woman | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/20/22(Sun)22:44:39 No.67863690 >want to be a woman >don't want to be trans >decide to try taking female hormones so that I can see if it makes me feel better or worse just as a test >no plan to ever stop presenting as a guy 190 KB JPG >was supposed to only take them for a week >today marks two years I think I f----- up bros. I've got boobs now.

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i didn’t see this on here so | /r/Greentext

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Anon doesn't like lolis | /r/Greentext

File: 77fda5d37d960c7cb2ae3f604(...).jpg (47 KB, 620x675) O Anonymous 03/21/22(Mon)14:11:23 No.874827708 [Reply] >Sees loli thread >"OMG DISGUSTING WHY WOULD YOU HAVE THESE PICS I MUST DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS!" >Spams over 20 of my 40000 terabyte folder of old man scat p--- on the thread >"That'll show them!"

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Anon is a chad because he did the right thing | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/22/19(Fri)03:00:39 No.793293384 >be me >have a giant crush on this girl I've known for 4 years but she's been in a relationship with a dude whom I also know >host a party but he was busy and didn't come 17 KB JPG >she was too drunk after party to drive and asked to stay over >found out she had been having relationship issues and wanted to cheat on him >refused >she gave me a sad look and feel asleep I'm still a virgin. I did good, right anons?

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Anon gets political | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: mqlYaJgP 05/14/20(Thu)00:07:29 No.257389974 I literally just hate America. I don't have any other politics. 78 KB JPG

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Anon dad is a retard | /r/Greentext

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Greentext Stories - Tinder date | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 11/06/17(Mon)06:20:58 No.750195751 >be me >24yo femanon >meet guy off tinder >he's super cute >possiblebf.jpeg >he suggests we go to mcdonalds >wants to meet at 1:30pm sharp 334 KB PNG >i show up at 1:30 and he says hi >he's in his mcdonalds uniform eating a big mac meal >"i get a free medium meal on my break, so how are you?" >i order a big mac meal and we chat >at 1:50, he says he wants to show me something cool out back >we go out back and he starts kissing me >we have sex >"s--- anon, i needed that. i'm going on a date-date tonight with this hot black girl and i dont wanna nut in her too soon" >at 1:58, he clocks back in and i go home >mfw

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