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>be me, 4th grade >be kid no one likes >at recess, a------ kids offer me 5 dollars to bitchslap a goose on the playground 20 KB JPG >hell yeah pokemon card money >run up to goose, and slap that f----- >goose goes a------, and begins to attack me >start screaming and running like a bitch >goose chases >I turn around, and grab the f------ throat, and spin it around like mario in mario 64 >pic related >never did get my 5 dollars *x 700 #120

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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Resolution: (640px x 532px)

File size: 111 KB

HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon‘s girlfriend won‘t stop farting | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: qcqw+HFF) 167 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: 7/3bbaXz Best thread on 4chan right now >>267225105 # 07/09/20(Thu)23:57:38 No.267224774 >gf keep farting during sex >i tell her to stop >stop what >stop farting >im not farting >keep f------ her >she keeps farting 07/10/20(Fri)00:00:08 No.267225026

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Anon doesn’t let life get him down | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Asking a girl out 78 KB JPG frogposters? 11/14/20(Sat) 18:25:14 No.60909992 >be me >20yrs old >Lifes good >Ask some girl I found attractive out >She refuses >Lifes still good How are you doing my fellow

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each burger is less than a dollar each | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/02/17(Fri)21:42:54 No.9005626 nuggets.jpg 478 KB JPG What is your largest fast food order? Anonymous 06/03/17(Sat)00:25:47 No.9006160 >>9005626 (OP) i was in the phillipines and ordered 30 yum burgers from jollibees because they were so cheap my action caused a huge scene because i was in a remote city that rarely sees white people, and the magnitude of burgers i ordered >>9006183 # 229006205 # Anonymous 06/03/17(Sat)00:45:01 No.9006205 >>9006160 >Never see a white person in all 35 years of your life >Hear stories about how much they eat >Think that impossible, nobody could stomach that much! >One day, skinny white man arrives >Astounding! >What a novelty! >But surely the rumors must be false, see how thin he is >Follow him into local Jollibees to confirm >He orders 30 f------ burgers >3 f------ 0 >Go home to wife >Tell her we must sell everything >Need to open hotdog stand in America >We will be fabulously wealthy

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Anon wants a peaceful life | /r/Greentext

04/08/22(Fri)20:18:19 No.68127114 : Anonymous i want to go to nuuk >bored >looking at countries on google maps >start looking for most remote areas 72 KB JPG >come across nuuk, a city in greenland, though it looks more like a small town >looks beautiful >come across a subreddit dedicated to it with less than 200 users >look at the photos people posted, they look so comfy and friendly >can imagine myself living there in a small house, making friends, enjoying the snow >no war, no politics, just a small town away from everyone else >fall in love with this town knowing damn well i'll never step foot in it pic related, its nuuk

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Anon is a NEET | /r/Greentext

05/19/21 (Wed)13:59:55 No.854808563 Anonymous >born into this world without my consent >want NEET life but not rich and no friends or family >decide to find a way to NEET 541 KB PNG >leave wallet and all forms of ID at home >no ID, no money, nothing. I am basically a ghost now >go to walmart >lay down in isle >don't move or respond to anything >eventually cops/ambulance will be called >they arrive and take me away, but still not responding, just doing absolutely nothing >they can't discharge me from hospital or from jail since they don't know who I am or where I live >can't just leave me outside to die >they are forced to take care of me >all while I just lay there and do nothing >the perfect NEET life 10 Replies View Thread

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anon fails to be a chad | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/29/18(Tue)12:49:54 No.45755456 YgmcQik.jpg 46 KB JPG >try to get a Chad haircut >comes out looking like pic related What the f--- am I doing wrong? I went to a proper hair stylist that cost $100. Should I shave it all off?

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Anon on Cr1TiKaL. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/20/22(Fri)23:48:11 No.68714289 1 8 KB JPG >hey guys it's critical >today we are taking yet another clip from my live stream of me watching a youtube video that somebody else made and getting a million views for what little I add in words with my boring dry tired voice >also, for comedic effect, I will stretch the image on the youtube thumbnail for the billionth time >please laugh

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Anon has a realization | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 17 KB PNG 05/20/22 (Fri)23:24:18 No.878548961 >for a website that is supposed to be homophobic, I really have seen some of the gayest s--- ever on here

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Something’s wrong with anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 88 KB JPG 05/20/22(Fri)15:35:33 No.68711164 why can't i stand for 15 minutes without finding it hard to breathe and feeling like i'm going to pass out? and no, i'm not fat. is this covid? i feel normal when i'm just sitting View Thread 05/20/22 (Fri) 15:39:46 No.68711216 3 Replies : Anonymous >>68711164 (OP) # go ask your doctor a------ >>68711227 #

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The joos have figured out how to fool the big guy. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/02/12 (Fri) 17:39 No. 1921453 If only you knew how bad things really are >Be a Jew >Sin all year >Transfer your sins to a chicken >Torture the chicken and kill it >The chicken goes to hell instead of you >Yay! we fooled God nxs rungra

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anon sells pisswater | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >be me >on some sketchy black market site >idea.png >sell loli bath water 74 KB JPG >its just me pissing in a tub of water and mixing it around >sell it for 50$ a jar >mfw profit >mfw pedos are drinking my piss >mfw one of them might have aids cause i let my friend with aids piss in it doing gods work here 11/07/21(Sun)18:45:13 No.866276836

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Anon finds love | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/08/19(Fri)17:38:28 No.792141603 >seeing some girl recently >go to her house to f--- her again >while we are cuddling ask her what's on her mind >tells me that she likes me >tell her I like her too 410 KB PNG >tells me how she likes to kiss me, hold me, how she likes me eyes, my laugh, the way I talk >we don't fall asleep until 5am >leave her house around 7am >keeps saying she doesn't want me to go >driving back to my place the feelings hit me >tfw you've been emotionally deprived for the first 19 years of your life >tfw you thought you would end up alone and a loser but you managed to turn out just fine >tfw you realize you aren't alone in this world >tfw you matter to someone It's a feeling that is warmer than heroin /b/

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Greentext Stories - Anon and goose | /r/Greentext

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>be me, 4th grade >be kid no one likes >at recess, a------ kids offer me 5 dollars to bitchslap a goose on the playground 20 KB JPG >hell yeah pokemon card money >run up to goose, and slap that f----- >goose goes a------, and begins to attack me >start screaming and running like a bitch >goose chases >I turn around, and grab the f------ throat, and spin it around like mario in mario 64 >pic related >never did get my 5 dollars *x 700 #120

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Uploaded May 21, 2022 at 09:28AM EDT

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