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Know Your Meme is the property of Literally Media ©2024 Literally Media. All Rights Reserved.
: Anonymous would you take this $500,000 j(...) if there was a job offered to you that was $500k a year, would you take it? job description: >every day, you have to take a dump in front of an audience 50 KB JPG >the audience you never see. you just know it's 100 people behind one of those 1-sided see-through mirrors >they record it with a video camera to watch later but NOBODY ELSE EVER SEES IT >you HAVE TO keep the job for 5 years >while you take a dump (completely naked btw) a 10/10 girl is standing in there with you, talking to you like a baby with encouragement "wow who's a big boy, keep pushing anon! i believe in you. wow that's a big poopie!" >you literally have to do a standing squat position and s--- right on the floor and walk out of the room without wiping at all. then you can use the shower >if you use the provided shower, the same female bathes you with soap and a sponge, being very supportive "wow anon that was a big poopy, you're such a big boy lol!" >if for whatever reason you wanted to get another job after the 5 years, they agreed that you could put any job on your resume and they'd lie about it >if you don't last the entire 5 years, they take all of the money back (unless there's some medical emergency) >even if you don't have to poop you have to stand there at least 10 minutes, squatting while the girl encourages you to take a dump >the company will hire a personal chauffer to drive you to and from the place if you want >after you take a dump there's a gormet chicken tendie and pizza platter if you so choose >no drug tests would you take this job? 06/11/22(Sat) 19:34:35 No.69004501

Would you take the job? | /r/Greentext


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Anonymous 21 KB JPG 05/07/21(Fri)21:38:10 No.63572031 >massive 4chan data leak happens >IPs for every post are leaked >they can now all be traced back to you What do in this situation? 13 Replies/2 Images Anonymous View Thread 05/07/21(Fri)21:46:14 No.63572130 >yeah i made all those racist, sexist, antisemetic, gay shitposts. What are you going to do about it? Cry? 229 KB PNG >>63572211 # Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:47:01 No.63572143 Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:50:54 No.63572193 Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:52:37 No.63572211 >>63572130 # >No, you're just going to lose your job. >Also, you can't be within 300 meters of a school. >>63572234 # Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:54:23 No.63572234 >>63572211 # >Lose my what? >Why would i want to go to a school?
Anonymous 12/05/15(Sat)23:25:38 No.28103985>>28104247 >>28104335 >>28105658 >>28105734 >>28106936 >>28110951 >live next to river >geese swarm our yard every year >neighbor is korean >likes to practice martial arts in his back yard >go outside one moming and look off our back deck >korean is in dramatic martial arts pose with a staff >4 geese are hissing menacingly >KKIIIIYYYAAAAAAAAAAAA! >Korean guy charges >geese charge →KKIIIIYYYAAAAAAAAAAAA! > asian fighting noises >today the spirits of his warrior anscestors have posessed him, a flurry of blows follow >one goose dead, one with its wing hanging like its broken and the rest run away while broken winged one flops around honking >korean guy makes asian fighting noises while he twirls his staff over his head >the east will show no mercy today >he smashes its head > he is breathing heavily and grinning like an idiot >I start clapping >he turns as red as it is possible for an asian to blush >hurriedly grabs two dead geese and sprints into his house >funniest s--- I've ever seen. >he turms as red as it is possible for an asian to blush 404 the east will show no mercy today Lámalian 2011
Being a ninja isn't cool anymore Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)21:07:00 No.913102938 >Be me >Wayward kid of the 80s >Dad's an alcoholic who hates me and calls me queer >Mom's a w---- who's snorts cocaine off of men's asses. >Outside all the time >No friends. >Suddenly meet new friends >Tell me they think I'm kickass and invite me to their club. >Suspicious but don't wanna go home. >Follow them anyway >Big warehouse with bitchin' arcade games, billiard tables, and some kid smoking a cigar. >Other kids think I'm cool. >Weeks pass >Dad still hates me, Mom still a w----. >Go to clubhouse >Friends tell me this adult came by and wants to speak to me and my friends. >Guy says we're cool and gives us rad ninja outfits and weapons >Fuckyeah.jpg >Guy trains us then tells us to go stand out in an alleyway to guard it. >About to tell my friend that he saved my life >Friend then eviscerated by a big ass turtle with two swords. >FML as another pizza-smelling turtle smacks me in the head with a stick.
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Greentext Stories - Would you take the job? | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous would you take this $500,000 j(...) if there was a job offered to you that was $500k a year, would you take it? job description: >every day, you have to take a dump in front of an audience 50 KB JPG >the audience you never see. you just know it's 100 people behind one of those 1-sided see-through mirrors >they record it with a video camera to watch later but NOBODY ELSE EVER SEES IT >you HAVE TO keep the job for 5 years >while you take a dump (completely naked btw) a 10/10 girl is standing in there with you, talking to you like a baby with encouragement "wow who's a big boy, keep pushing anon! i believe in you. wow that's a big poopie!" >you literally have to do a standing squat position and s--- right on the floor and walk out of the room without wiping at all. then you can use the shower >if you use the provided shower, the same female bathes you with soap and a sponge, being very supportive "wow anon that was a big poopy, you're such a big boy lol!" >if for whatever reason you wanted to get another job after the 5 years, they agreed that you could put any job on your resume and they'd lie about it >if you don't last the entire 5 years, they take all of the money back (unless there's some medical emergency) >even if you don't have to poop you have to stand there at least 10 minutes, squatting while the girl encourages you to take a dump >the company will hire a personal chauffer to drive you to and from the place if you want >after you take a dump there's a gormet chicken tendie and pizza platter if you so choose >no drug tests would you take this job? 06/11/22(Sat) 19:34:35 No.69004501

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Uploaded Jun 11, 2022 at 11:30PM EDT

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Greentext Stories

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Reddit

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reddit, greentext, greentext memes, 4chan, 4chan memes, /r/greentext, jaw, smile, font

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