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950A350D-BD1A-4D16-9315-B4048A341923.jpg 192 KB JPG >be playing dark souls 3 during lockdown >have sweet, gentle and caring mother that would never hurt anybody >she asks me to take down the Christmas lights from in front of our house >finish in a few minutes and go back to playing DS3 >she walks in and says I've made a mistake >tells me that I took down the Christmas lights from the roof instead of the fence like she asked me to(i had misheard her) >looks at me dead in the eye and says >'Idiot. You're an idiot. You're a f------ idiot to begin with. Only coward losers use dex/int builds. >tells me to gitgud before leaving

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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You're meant to go to sleep at the end of a good day instead of going on 4chan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous When did you realize the inter(...) 198 KB PNG 08/10/21(Tue) 14:37:59 No.64917545 >be me, yesterday afternoon >spend my days off getting high alone in my apartment and browsing 4chins >Decide f--- it, I'll drop by my parents house and visit them >Dad is working on the car fixing the brake line >I help him out >we chat about the family drama and how everyone is doing >I say f--- it and drop by my grandparents house to say hello >Forgot it's my grandfather's bday and a bunch of my cousins are there >We decide to play cards and have a few beers >Chat about when we were kids and how much fun we used to have >Back to my apartment >Decide that my good day shouldn't end and text some people from work to see if they want to hang out at the local bar >2 of them show up at the bar >We have a good time, even made some new friends at the bar >Walk home feeling the happiest I've been in my adult life >Start browsing /r9k/ back at my apartment and feel an overwhelming sadness

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Anon doesn’t know what to do | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/25/21(Sun)00:34:06 No.64702696 >be me >get phone call from unknown number >ignores it >unknown caller leaves voicemail >voicemail says theres a gift at my door >checks front door thinking my friend is trolling me >opens the box at front door 302 KB JPG >has a plastic Jason mask with paint on it and a note that says "dont fail we are watching, kill them" >gets more voicemails telling me to go to certain addresses >doesn't go thinking its some re making a empty threat >gets brick thrown through my window with a note attached >note says "strike 1" should i do what they say?

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anon goes to a family christmas party | /r/Greentext

⠀ onymous st Christmas 97 KB JPG 12/25/22(Sun)19:40:15 No.891372813 >be me >23 >at Christmas party with my family >grandma asks my roastie cousin about her 15th bf in the last 2 weeks >turns over to me >ohfuck.jpeg >look over at her >asks if I finally got a gf >think about a good lie to explain why I've never had a qf at 23 >after staring for 4 seconds at her I shout >"I'm gay" >whole family looks at me >my dad starts crying and leaves the room >he mumbles "I always knew" >dad drives away and he hasn't been seen in hours This is the worst f------ Christmas ever.

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Anon has a queetion about statistics | /r/Greentext

T onymous 282 KB PNG 2 Replies / 1 Image : Anonymous >>71548199 # Anonymous 12/25/22(Sun)20:20:49 No.71548159 30 KB JPG merry christmas, robots. ever wondered what the suicide rate in this board is? merry christmas not a gay goes by that I don't want to blow my brain out 12/25/22(Sun)20:22:14 No.71548172 View Thread 12/25/22(Sun)20:24:48 No.71548199 >>71548172 # >gay hahaha f-----

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Anon has a fart fetish | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/20/18(Tue)21:55:51 No.43359586 Stupid things youn have done thread 2 Replies >consistently dutch-ovened myself for the past few years to prepare for eating ass >finally get a girl to sit on my face 46 KB JPG >she does not fart once Is this what all my Jedi training has paid off for? View Thread

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Christmas Mystery | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/25/22(Sun)04:14:40 No.71541360 >>71541605 >>71542712 Do I celebrate christmas at 12 or was I supposed to be celebrating all day? Anonymous 12/25/22(Sun)04:39:15 No.71541605 >>71541360 (OP) You can celebrate Christmas at any age. You don't have to be 12.

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anon touches his first boob | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/07/18(Fri) 22:26:16 No.779318356 >be me >walking in school hallway >pass by school thot who isn't wearing a bra >her t--- bounce making a clapping sound >realize that sound travels through air my touching the air then touching your ear >basically touched a boob See you later virgins 91 KB JPG

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Anon doesn't get invited | /r/Greentext

: onymous 10 KB PNG [Advertise on 4chan] 12/25/22(Sun)07:43:42 No.891365912 >haven't seen my family for Christmas in 12 years >my mom always goes down to Arizona to see them >this year I saved up enough money and requested a week off so I could go visit >I was super excited to go >told my cousin on Facebook I was coming this year but got left on read >my mom called the next day and told me I need to stay home because they have a lot going on >I was disappointed but understood >open up snapchat this morning to see my mom's story >my brother, sister, cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents are all there >I'm the only one spending Christmas alone >my mom shortly after deleted the story and called me a dozen times >they don't have a lot going on at all >I just wasn't invited

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Femcel is struggling | /r/Greentext

onymous he 98 KB JPG 12/24/22(Sat)19:52:17 No.71539065 >be chickn >talk to new e-boy who's 29 years old >He mentions he's got a body count of ten >he's still not married and still wants kids >I'm femcel and had only one sexual encounter in 2022 why are men such w-----? did he even try to marry the people he's been with? excluding the men because they can't get pregnant. I'm not like him though I tried to marry my ex bf and buy engagement rings at a thrift store but he's only nineteen

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Anon's roommate is a film major | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 67 KB JPG a)22:00:16 N8.71404193 >roommate is a messy m-----------, doesn't do dishes while other roommate and I do >he hosts party, dishes still out day after >ask if he can clean them up before my friend visits so the house is clean >"okay" >later, dishes are clean >thank roommate for cleaning up dishes >"you don't f------ need to thank me for washing the dishes anon, it's f------ demeaning" I never considered myself the autistic type, but what the f---. Is it related to him being a film major?

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Anon sees the future | /r/Greentext

File: 1363594793444.jpg-(38 KB, 526x522, 1358057341807.jpg) Anonymous 03/18/13(Mon)04:19 No.4640 >Be 16 >After a long time, and with the support of my friends, I decide to come out to my parents >Admit to them I'm a Genderdysmorphic-octononcis- bifemitalia-gender queer-pseudo Anonymous 03/18/13(Mon)04:20 No.4690 What the hell did I just read. antinonouncis-quasidecosexual >They didn't even know what it is but said they supported me because they were my parents >"We love you son" >"I'M NOT YOUR SON, I'M YOUR XON YOU F------ NAZI" >Run away from home, my s------- town doesn't even have a shelter for Genderdysmorphic-octononcis-bifemitalia-gender queer-pseudo antinonouncis-quasidecosexuals >whatisthisthemiddlefuckingages.gif >Have to spend the next 3 days in the city park because my parents refuse to let me be myself by addressing me as xe/xer and buying me ocular tampons to help me with my transition Anyone else have stories of the fascist society not accepting you? Please do share.

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Anon is not going to pass the class | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous LR 12/18/22(Sun)21:43:17 No.71456218 Connor, Read the syllabus. I do not round. Many students have found themselves in this situation but I cannot adjust grades. 384CD9A7-397A-4854-A17D-A4E5537B7E56.jpg 76 KB JPG >Need one more point on the final to pass the class >Email the prof and explain my situation to the foul beast >Get this as a response Why? Just why?

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Greentext Stories - Anons mother is a chad | /r/Greentext

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950A350D-BD1A-4D16-9315-B4048A341923.jpg 192 KB JPG >be playing dark souls 3 during lockdown >have sweet, gentle and caring mother that would never hurt anybody >she asks me to take down the Christmas lights from in front of our house >finish in a few minutes and go back to playing DS3 >she walks in and says I've made a mistake >tells me that I took down the Christmas lights from the roof instead of the fence like she asked me to(i had misheard her) >looks at me dead in the eye and says >'Idiot. You're an idiot. You're a f------ idiot to begin with. Only coward losers use dex/int builds. >tells me to gitgud before leaving

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