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File: berk pepe.jpg (102 KB, 1338x885) F------ NORMIES REEEEEEEEE GREEEFEESSU Anonymous 12/14/17(Thu) 15:33:36 No.753817649 >finally get a d&d game going >really big berserk fan >thought it would be funny to make a pepe guts as a PC >we go out and smoke a blunt >friend goes rogue >first quest is to hunt a boar >intimidate a guy to give me his bow >give the bow to rogue >this guy f------ sucks >misses first shot he fires it flies into a bush and we get attacked by goblins >he tries to attack with his dagger >rolls a 1 and accidentaly throws away his dagger >forgets to pick it up afterwards >finally found the boar >rogue tries to sneak up on him and tries to attack >DM reminds him he doesn't have a dagger >put the boar out of his misery >drag him back to town >waytoostonedforthis.jpeg >rogue asks if he can slip a finger up the boars ass >i encourage him to just put his whole arm in it >the madman attemps it >rolls a f------ 20 >DM tells him his arm is up to the shoulder in a boar's ass and that the boar didn't even notice >my turn >told the DM i want to use my brute strength to put him further in >he's up to his waist now >get only half the reward because the boar was mutilated >party agrees to not smoke and play d&d again

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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boomer moment?? | /r/Greentext

Obamna 01/24/23(Tue)09:51:07 No.893187613 >going in a walk with parents >Married couple asks me to take a picture of them >refuse and say no sorry i dont want too >they laugh >parents criticize me all the way home Was i wrong here, i dont even know those people, why should i give a f--- Since when are you not supposed to refuse things now

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Anon turns 18 | /r/Greentext

>be me >having 18th birthday at home >pretty chill time with friends >brother asks if me I want to see his Minecraft world >tell him to go away >see he's hurt >feel guilty and say I'll check it out later >never check it >a few months later, brother gets leukemia >pray he gets better >he doesn't >brother dies >feels like s--- >turn 21 >packing stuff up for college >notice brother's old laptop >for some reason, remembers broken promise >charge up computer >boot up Minecraft >see world named "HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANON!!!!!" >load up world >beginning to tear up at this point >world loads >look around and see cake everywhere >giant pixel cake in front of me >balloons across the sky >turn around and see "HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY" built with blocks >under b-day message is a sign >sign says "happy birthday anon. You're the best brother ever. :DDD" >f------ cry for hours

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Anon is deeply, deeply broken | /r/Greentext

25 KB JPG 01/24/23(Tue) 16:23:24 No.16909728 > be me > bullied in kindergarten and elementary school > fat, virgin no friends > "Why do I always end up bullied?" > during high school I was basically a fat incel > I stopped caring about social life, 24/7 playing league > "I know the answer, its my looks.." > Started bonesmashing, mewing, lifting etc > actually got ultra glow up > girls started approaching me > my bullies stopped bullying me (they started ignoring me, which wasnt good aswell) > first kiss, sex was in a month with 3 different girls > my bodycount was 8 in 3 months somehow and all sex was in toilets > now after year of meaningless parties I started trying to get a gf > always got into a talking stage > always failed > already 10 girls in last half year has rejectrd me > I asked them how much would they give me out of 10 and they all said 8-9/10, anyway they "werent ready" > then they dated uglier dudes.. > depression kicks in rn Started to realizing. My personality is s---. I want to kill myself even more. Looksmax is not that hard guys but how can I change myself? I watched thousands of ytb videos how to improve my acting but I actually cant, it seems like they can see through me. I am about to end it up soon.. > maybe I am just a s--- and they see it

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Anon regrets his cowardice- | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/14/18 (Wed)02:03:49 No.49268962 54 KB PNG >tfw ideal is qt emo looking gf >pale skin, black hair, bangs, cute face, not fat >it's not 2008 anymore >I didn't have to courage to talk to them when I was a teenager >emo chicks aren't around anymore, especially in 20s age bracket this feels like when your favourite food place stops making your favourite limited time food, but worse.

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Anons mum likes memes, rather unexpectedly- | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/11/17(Mon)23:27:51 No.753574540 >be 17 >be chatting in group chat with friends >be sending some memes >accidently send a meme to mom >shieeet.jpeg >explain to mom 58 KB PNG >mom sends a rare pepe >allmywut.jpeg >turns out mom knows alot about good memes >now we send memes to eachother almost daily >never been happier all my life >pic related

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Based sea creature | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/28/22 (Wed)13:09:59 No.70377616 1664335122333743.jpg 612 KB JPG >sea creature breaks pipeline >humans blame eachother >they all die in ww3 >fish population returns

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anon is a self centred pos | /r/Greentext

: Obamna 1.93 MB GIF 01/24/23(Tue) 14:21:07 No.893187613 >going in a walk with parents >Married couple asks me to take a picture of them >refuse and say no sorry i dont want too >they laugh >parents criticize me all the way home Was i wrong here, i dont even know those people, why should i give a f--- Since when are you not supposed to refuse things now >>893187749 # : Anonymous >>893187613 (OP) # Would have taken two seconds, made someone happy, built a little character for you. Instead you had an embarrassing meltdown over something trivial 01/24/23(Tue)14:24:10 No.893187694

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Anon hops on the e-bike trend | /r/Greentext

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Anon creates a pocket bazooka | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/22/20(Sun)01:52:18 No.44357235 >>44357256 pocket mortar.jpg (28 KB, 400x300) google yandex iqdb wait W 1100 >>44357225 Also POCKET MORTAR. Anonymous 03/22/20(Sun)01:56:16 No.44357256 >>44357270 >>44357235 that's a M8 flare pistol with a 37x94 Hotchkiss shell don't fit bud 0493) V Anonymous 03/22/20(Sun)01:58:39 No.44357270 >>44357483 pocket mortar fit.jpg (14 KB, 300x225) google yandex iqdb wait >>44357256 ARTI V 9.F HAHAHAHAHAHA YOU WISH YOU WERE RIGHT

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Anon is autistic | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >tfw not neurotypical after al(...) -- 01/23/23(Mon)17:04:19 No.71940486 1.95 MB GIF >mfw almost 22 years old and only now dealing with the realization i am probably autistic >everything from my childhood lines up perfectly, but i hid it by avoiding social interaction and sticking to video games >always laughed off the idea because i felt normal, despite being terrible at making / keeping friends, jobs, doing the same things all the time, etc. Bros... How do I deal with this? There's no cure. I just... am autistic now.

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anon should kill himself | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous idiot 28 KB JPG : Anonymous Kys f-- 01/24/23(Tue)08:53:16 No.893173964 >be me >f-- >try and give off subtle hints without making it painfully obvious >guy at work hits on me >call him a f------ loser and demoralize him in front of everyone >he quits the next day >this is the second time something like this has happened How do I stop spazzing out 01/24/23(Tue)09:22:42 No.893175510 01/24/23(Tue)09:32:36 No.893175911 : Anonymous >>893173964 (OP) # Should really just kys honestly no other option : Anonymous >>893173964 (OP) # Hey buddy, kill yourself 01/24/23(Tue)09:39:57 No.893176269

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Anon is Pete Davidson if He Were Cooler | /r/Greentext

File: received 1974516546119619.jpg (24 KB, 541x642) >be me >8 years old >playing around in my dads car >looking at the guages >think the car is empty because the fuel guage says low >remember that he has a important meeting in town the next day >idea.webm >hatch a plan to fill up dads car for him with the garden hose >decide to surprise him in the morning >he starts the car >"what the hell i thought i only had half a tank" >"surprise dad" >car dies >"what did you do?" >explain >dads p----- >going on about how hes going to miss his big meeting >calls taxi >taxi takes forever but arrives >taxi drops me off at my grandparents house 3 blocks away >grandma comes running out screaming like a banshee >she rushes me and dad into the house >look on the tv >911 >tfw dumb s--- as a kid saved my dad

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Greentext Stories - Anon plays a game of d&d | /r/Greentext

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File: berk pepe.jpg (102 KB, 1338x885) F------ NORMIES REEEEEEEEE GREEEFEESSU Anonymous 12/14/17(Thu) 15:33:36 No.753817649 >finally get a d&d game going >really big berserk fan >thought it would be funny to make a pepe guts as a PC >we go out and smoke a blunt >friend goes rogue >first quest is to hunt a boar >intimidate a guy to give me his bow >give the bow to rogue >this guy f------ sucks >misses first shot he fires it flies into a bush and we get attacked by goblins >he tries to attack with his dagger >rolls a 1 and accidentaly throws away his dagger >forgets to pick it up afterwards >finally found the boar >rogue tries to sneak up on him and tries to attack >DM reminds him he doesn't have a dagger >put the boar out of his misery >drag him back to town >waytoostonedforthis.jpeg >rogue asks if he can slip a finger up the boars ass >i encourage him to just put his whole arm in it >the madman attemps it >rolls a f------ 20 >DM tells him his arm is up to the shoulder in a boar's ass and that the boar didn't even notice >my turn >told the DM i want to use my brute strength to put him further in >he's up to his waist now >get only half the reward because the boar was mutilated >party agrees to not smoke and play d&d again

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