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Anonymous honk 77 KB JPG 10/16/19(Wed)16:46:41 No.811959173 >be me >white boy from USA >visiting Mexico >one night trying to sleep >3 AM and a bunch of f----- b------ with instruments roll through >loudest f------ s--- ever >pisses me right tf off >lean out the window and shout QUIETE PUTAS >friend comes running up stairs >ANON W-- ARE YOU DOING > I'm like what >he says THATS THE TOWNS BIGGEST DRUG LORD OVER THERE AND THAT BAND WAS PLAYING FOR HIM >look outside and see everyone has put away their instruments and replaced them with guns >this is it boys >today I take the fight to the b------ Mfw I realize this is it Mfw this will be my last greentext

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File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie

Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

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pic goes so hard | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous alien harems 06/29/23(Thu)12:50:49 No.35162077 reversealien.png 1.57 MB PNG >Be alien inspecting earth >Crash land and encounter humans on the earth's surface >8 young women ask to have a reverse gangbang What do you do?

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Anon watches too much succubus hentai | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/14/22(Sun)21:42:24 No.883915196 >be me >have female friend >is a solid 8/10 >has a "male orgasm fetish" as she puts it >sends me food if i give her videos of 149 KB JPG me jerking off >be naturally submissive male so im moaning >she likes it >one day comes over to my place and just sucks my d--- and tittyfucks me many times >"thanks anon Ive been craving to try your sperm, youre a really good boy" >just gives me a f------ hug then leaves is this how you get a girlfriend

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Anon's mom is cleaning | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/29/23(Thu)15:50:48 No.73844746 1687876743067836.jpg 39 KB JPG >mum starts cleaning the whole house, filling the air with sounds of vaccuum cleaning and smells of solvents stop cleaning you bitch im trying to Idar neet rot just die already so i can live under a bridge : Anonymous 06/29/23(Thu)15:53:10 No.73844765 you can go live under a bridge now dumb f-----, see how respectful people are of your peace there

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Anon's Dad Is Concerned | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 108 KB JPG 06/15/23(Thu)20:37:41 No.73689251 >2012 >be 12 year old with no friends >tf2 is my favorite game, playing it almost everyday >A few days after sandy hook happened, my dad is walking down the hallway and stops at the doorway of my room with a weird look on his face >"Hey, how about easing up on those games every now and then, alright?" >Never thought anything of it then What do you think he meant by that?

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Germanon is being paranoid | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: QqomDtTV) = 04/01/23(Sat)22:34:09 No.421939042 >>421936768 (OP) # It seems that they are marrying their daughters with German boys to convert them to Islam and create a Neo Jaissary army. 3.32 MB WEBM The Turks are masters of warfare and won't stop until they reached the goal of their ancestors. Total besiege and control of Europe. Total destruction of Christians and converting the survivors to Islam. >Janissaries were used as military troops to defeat and enslave other Christian nations and cultures. Maintaining the influence of the Muslim Turkish empire. >During Turkish raids, small boys were especially coveted plunder. Turkish warriors kidnapped young Christian boys and gave them as a gift to the sultan. Sultan brainwashed them and converted them into Islam. These boys became Janissaries. >>421939825 # >>421939863 # >>421952401 # >>421952712 # >>421955148 # >>421960464 # >>421965711 #

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Anon's got some predictions | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 305 KB JPG BAD 06/21/23(Wed)12:16:49 No.186598830 >>186596513 (OP) # >we gotta build a bomb >oh my god einstein we're about to build a nuclear bomb >NOOOO DON'T TELL ME IT'S LE >oppenwife: i love you opie build le bomb >we built the bomb >w-- you detonated it in japan? what about the evil racist nazi chuds??? uhhh I DIDN'T KNOW IT WOULD EXPLODE W-- >I AM BECOME DEATH AAAAAA >TRUMAN I HAVE BLOOD ON MY HANDS IM GOING TO CHAINSMOKE MYSELF TO DEATH that's gonna be the movie. screencap this.

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Anon loses their Canadian citizenship | /r/Greentext

File: 3FCyXvT7Kw.png (92 KB, 1854x451) 3.3k r/legaladvicecanada u/Slight-Cricket-3892 . 16h ago My degree got revoked for cheating, now my Canadian citizenship might be revoked and I'm facing statelessness. Canada I am a naturalized Canadian citizen. There was a particularly tricky unit in my university course and I'm ashamed to say that I paid a programmer to code a major project. I graduated and eventually got Canadian citizenship, through the university degree and relevant work experience. Last year, the programmer contacted me and started blackmailing me for $100 monthly or else he would report me to the uni. The programmer had extensive email evidence. I obliged at first but his demands got higher. Since I already have work experience, I figured out loosing my degree wouldn't be a big deal. Long story short, he reported me and my university revoked my degree, I thought that would be the end of it. But I recently got a written notice from the Citizenship and Passport Cases Division that they are investigating my citizenship for fraud, and instructed me to write an information letter to them pleading my case. I love Canada and my entire life is here. I already lost my home countries citizenship since they do not allow dual citizenship. I will end up stateless if they decide to revoke my citizenship. Does anyone here have any advice or case law which I can write in my information letter? Edit: Upon closer inspection to the letter, it seems like they are just investigating my circumstances in general since I now have a history of fraud. I think I'll be fine since I was honest otherwise. Bottom line, don't buy assignments, and if you have bought assignments, don't stress too much. Anyhow, If I do end up losing my citizenship, you will see it on national news soon. permalink reddit do you guys also cheat when doing your programming homework /g/? Anonymous 06/29/23(Thu)01:56:59 No.94349328 >>94353504 >>94353524 >>94353700 >>94353785 >>94353806 >>94353840 >>94353976 >>94354039 >>94354052 >>94354153 Anonymous 06/29/23(Thu)10:03:17 No.94354274 ► >>94351557 >enroll in college >that will be 50 grand, +tip, +taxes, +barracks, +gruel >black history semester is a slog >barely scraping by spanish class >decide to google the answer to my gender studies assignment >canadian citizenship revoked 85% Upvoted >>94351541 >>94351612 >>94351619 >>94351980 >>94352069 >>94352110 >>94352129 >>94353090 >>94353133 >>94353378 >>94353500

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Anon's mom is radicalized by Supreme Court Affirmative Action ruling | /r/Greentext

>be me, asian California anon entering senior year HS >3.9 GPA (4.4 weighted), 34 ACT >always figured it wasn't gonna be enough to get me to a real college >my mom wakes me up early this morning, she is smiling, cooks me a huge f------ breakfast, starting to freak me out >she tells me Supreme Court just ruled against affirmative action 1.51 MB PNG >I AM GONNA F------ MAKE IT BROS LET'S F------ GOOOOOOOO >my mom shows me the list of schools where my GPA and ACT are the average >PRINCETON, STANFORD, PENN, BROWN, CORNELL >MOM IS SCREAMING, I HAVE NEVER SEEN HER THIS HAPPY >turn on MSNBC (mom is a resistance lib) and there is a panel talking about how the Supreme Court is white supremacist, and anyone who benefits from this ruling is a white supremacist >mom is crying, she loves MSNBC but she also loves me, knows she has to choose >she turns off the TV and hugs me over and over >1 hour later, I walk into the living room and see mom buying a white hood and robe and a John Roberts mug on the internet what is happening to my mom bros?

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Serbanon misses an opportunity | /r/Greentext

File: Flag_of_Serbia.svg.png (77 KB, 800x533) Babetes Anonymous 06/29/23(Thu)03:52:30 No.73839674 ► >>73840302 >>73840655 >>73840679 >in very large university groupchat >albanian girl asks "are you bosnian?, i have a bosnian friend with the same name" >im serbian and i know shes albanian. >profuselysweat.jpg >pretend like i didnt see that >realize there was also a turkish girl >realize that if i didnt ghost her we could have unleashed insurmountable shithousery onto unsuspecting liberal americnas ☐ Anonymous 06/29/23(Thu)04:06:05 No.73839752 ► >>73841180 srbe na vrbe desu :) >> Anonymous 06/29/23(Thu)04:37:56 No.73839963 ► File: 4265a8a.jpg (51 KB, 1080x389) That would've been based anon. I love scaring the american hoes with my uninhibited ultranationalism. Anonymous 06/29/23(The 4:40:47 No.73839984 ► >tfw no retarded nationalist serb bf who I can tell kosovo is serbia to and then kiss its over >> ☐ Anonymous 06/29/23(Thu)05:38:09 No.73840302 >>73840328 >>73839674 (OP) Zasto se trebamo pretvarati da se mrzimo kad vise nikog nije briga??? Sta se dogodilo s bratsvom i jedinstvom?

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Too bothersome to sue, too annoying to just let it go. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >be me >girl >at work >old man I help at the register sees me on lunch break >he immediately comes up to me >small talk ensues >before he leaves, he hugs me from the side and gives me a forehead kiss >tells me to not eat too much on New Years or else I wont be as cute anymore How does one react to this please help E 12/30/22(Fri)20:38:30 No.71625248 2.04 MB PNG

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anon sticks to the bro code | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/29/23(Thu)09:32:42 No.73839528 [Reply] >friend has a crush on the girl i'm talking to >she is very obviously flirty with me and not him >realize this >try to f--- up my game as much as possible by acting retarded and disinterested >she still flirts with me >tell her flat out i masturbate to hentai >she still flirts with me Is there something else I can do, short of saying "I don't want to f--- you because my best friend does?"

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Anon is an average redditor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous rjunpopularopinion Raidsdayz 4d 2 I hate the sun I really do not understand why people enjoy when it's sunny out. It's too bright, too hot, you get burned, and it's harder to drive. And personally 1 get headaches. I've also noticed that people tend to act really stupid when the weather is like that (it reminds me of when insects become activated/ crazy when the sun is out). Why do people enjoy it so much? Join Edit: did not expect this to blow up lol. Thank you for all the upvotes and nice comments. 2427 Share G 290 KB JPG sunburned >ughmetoo 06/29/23(Thu)08:32:00 No.901734778 >be me this morning >21m >scrolling past John Oliver posts on le Reddit >come across a post on r/unpopularopinion "I hate the sun" >remember of that time I got >start scrolling through r/unpopularopinon >shove a curling iron into my ass >agree with more posts >curling iron feels so good and warm and right like the exclusive validation from the select few with whom I share the same onion >people with regular, not unpopular, opionjons begin to seem like delusional normies unaware of their own mediocrity >think about how special and unique I am >anus clenches around the curling iron >start typing "unpopular opinion" in front of all my posts >keep scrolling through r/unpopolaropinon >pop a viagra >start upvoting all the unpopular opionons I agree with >finger hovers over the upvote button >wow I share this unpopular opinion with 12.1k other kind strangers we're all so special and different >inhale the rancid smell of burning flesh and s--- >tingly sensation throughout my body >feel the 21st chromosome in each cell of my body begin to prophase and metaphase >incompletemitosis.gif >try to process w-- happened but literally can't bc I'm a f------ retard >screech as the curling iron sears and chars my a------

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Greentext Stories - Anon goes to Mexico | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

Anonymous honk 77 KB JPG 10/16/19(Wed)16:46:41 No.811959173 >be me >white boy from USA >visiting Mexico >one night trying to sleep >3 AM and a bunch of f----- b------ with instruments roll through >loudest f------ s--- ever >pisses me right tf off >lean out the window and shout QUIETE PUTAS >friend comes running up stairs >ANON W-- ARE YOU DOING > I'm like what >he says THATS THE TOWNS BIGGEST DRUG LORD OVER THERE AND THAT BAND WAS PLAYING FOR HIM >look outside and see everyone has put away their instruments and replaced them with guns >this is it boys >today I take the fight to the b------ Mfw I realize this is it Mfw this will be my last greentext

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