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: Anonymous 08/07/23 (Mon)18:12:18 No.74299055 1672851915164812.jpg 25 KB JPG >you're so handsome anon >All I can see is my ugly self >You have such an amazing deep voice anon >cringe whenever I hear myself Why. I just want to know why I I don't see what everyone else is seeing. Is it just that they can see how depressed I am and are just trying to make me feel better?

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anons dad is based | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/07/23(Mon)21:14:32 No.74300712 >built a small fire pit in backyard a few years ago >family rarely uses it >cut to 2021, dad getting older >one night he lights a fire in the pit and just stares with a beer in hand 575 KB JPG >no music or anything >does this for hours on end for multiple nights >still doing it current day >hates wintertime because when it snows "he can't light the fire and watch" Is my dad autistic?

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Anon tries catfishing | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Toki 08/07/23(Mon)21:09:08 No.74300653 >set up chad's fake tinder account a few weeks ago >have lots of matches >but one chick was especially horny for you >she texts you how she wants to f--- you and how great you look 857 KB JPG >insists on meeting you for ons >tell her you're out of town and be back in a week >do not access fake chad's account for the last week >sign in today >she's texting you that she's really looking forward to seeing you tomorrow, she's booked a train for herself and then a hotel room for us should I tell her it's all a lie or just delete the account without explanation?

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Anon gets laid | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/29/18 (Wed)07:45:31 No.47810294 59 KB PNG >be me >24yo anon >meet girl on tinder >she's super cute >possiblegf.jpeg >not sure what a 9/10 is doing with me >i'm a total 3/10 >have amazing sex >afterwards ask her what my appeal was >"oh my stepdad was really fat so it's sort of my fetish" >mfw

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Anon starts a whale business | /r/Greentext

File: dsfasdf3.jpg (15 KB, 240x360) whale business Anonymous 08/06/23(Sun)20:31:41 No.74292757 > be me > stoned as f--- watching old 480p Discovery s--- on youtube > good vid about whales being chill AF > starts talking about ambergris, dude is like "we pay thousands for this crap" > idea.jpeg > f--- whales getting all the cash I want in on this racket > watched vid on whale anatomy...just like people but with more flippers > eat omega what whales eat make my own ambergris > hatch plan hit up Long John Silver it's Friday got all weekend to start producing > get inside F--- place is filled with jews those crafty f------ must have the same idea > order 20 fish > jew looking doods eating like 2 fish...f------ amatures > pound down the fish slabs no chewing just like the whales do > order 10 more fish > "are you sure you want 10 fish?" f------ wage cuck > tell him "yes I need more omegas" > dude overhears says you can get omega pills > thank the wise jew sage and head to walgreens > s--- is f------ expensive....pound two jars in the isle and f--- out > get home...feeling whale like and lethargic > ambergris churning inside me > simulate whale habitat fill tub with water and pour in all the salt > get in tub start making whale calls > bitchy neighbor yelling at me to STFU > she clearly doesn't understand the nuances of whale business > can sense the ambergris is ready to burst > ambergris stars pouring out of me from both ends > being a whale is hard work > going to let it coagulate in the tub for a few days then start bottling and selling to the French > I have become whale > gonna buy a yacht hang out with my whale hommies

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Anon is fighting the good fight | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 294 KB PNG 12/14/18(Fri)21:51:57 No.787382495 Got a story to tell /b/ >be me >at track meet >approached by random kid >"hey anon, have you done you civic duties and subscribed to pewdiepie?" >fuckyeah.jpg >I followed him around after that >he asked almosto everybody at the meet >he got multiple people to sub to pewdiepie Keep fighting the good fight, brave soldier.

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Anons are not impressed by Season 2 of The Wire | /r/Greentext

File: Sobotka.jpg (104 KB, 1280x720) The Wire Anonymous 08/07/23(Mon)11:43:15 No. 188484000 [Reply] >>188484211 >>188484526 >>188484570 >A bloo bloo, I had to turn to crime, you left us to rot for 25 years out there our union is poor : (((( >Also if you try to work at our dock but haven't been here longer than you've been breathing good luck getting any shifts, seniority y'know it's what keeps this thing alive What the f--- was their problem? How can you complain about the consequences of turning to smuggling and act like you're a victim of circumstance when you hog the majority of the ships for yourself? How does he expect younger local guys to get in and pay dues so they can afford things like the grain canal legally? Anonymous 08/07/23 (Mon)11:49:56 No.188484211 > Anonymous 08/07/23 (Mon)11:52:20 No.188484282 Anonymous 08/07/23 (Mon)11:59:59 No. 188484526 >>188484000 (OP) Why didn't Frank just work freelance as a graphic designer or something

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Anon is cybersecure | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 28 KB JPG 03/10/23(Fri)00:56:47 No.72515517 >be me >cybersecurity analyst >make six figure salary >tell ladies I make a six figure salary >they ask for my name and phone number >I'm too smart to give out my personal information

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Why would liberals do this? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/11/22(Wed)20:27:39 No.877971132 5077E542-BAD4-47B9-B06C-F21D4CDB958C.jpg 144 KB JPG The reason The McRib is not a full time menu item is because of liberals. Let me explain >Liberals have stupid ideas >Not making the McRib a full time menu item is a stupid idea why would liberals do this

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Anon is a soyjak. | /r/Greentext

kek.png (74 KB, 1000x1233) 26 Anonymous 07/08/23 (Mon) 14:41:45 No.903913245 >be me at the mall >sees a heckin' loli >suddenly my brain does an autism >in my mind i scream out: >"AYYYYY000000000!!! IS THAT A HECKIN' LOLI?!??!!" while imagining the soyjak in pic related on a scale of 1/10 how based am i? [Index] [Catalog] [Top]

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Anon drives home for dinner | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/08/17(Wed)22:02:56 No.724775776 >drive a creepy r--- van equipped with twin hadley air horns. >pull up behind 16 year old girl in a early 90's vw cabriolet. >at a red light. >she's not paying attention and texting on her phone. >think it would be funny to make her jump. >blast my horns. >she panics and floors it right into the busy intersection without looking. >gets t-boned be a full sized chevy truck doing 45mph. >she never stood a chance. >I drove away slowly, went home and ate dinner. >>724775862 # >>724775992 #

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Missed the chance to live rent free | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 127 KB JPG : Anonymous 59 KB JPG 07/29/21(Thu)12:01:02 No.154238346 >Peter, you're 5 minutes late to our date. I'm gonna go f--- some dudes now while you think about your behavior Name a worse capeshit love interest. 07/29/21(Thu)12:27:24 No.154238914 >>154238346 (OP) # >landlord was literally trying to set peter up with his daughter >still simps for mary jane he deserves whatever bad things happened desu >>154238974 # >>154239096 # >>154239254 # >>154239631 # >>154240264 # >>154241451 # >>154241657 # >>154241866 # >>154243008 # >>154243882 # >>154250514 # >>154251754 #

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Anon has watermelon........ | /r/Greentext

>be 20 >heard you can f--- watermelons >buys personal watermelon >cuts a round hole >starts f------ watermelon >took like 40mins >not much better than fapping >felt shame >buried melon in a shallow grave >come summer time melons grew in the backyard >family eats them >"you don't want any melon anon?" >no Never had watermelon since

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Greentext Stories - Anon is a little silly | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 08/07/23 (Mon)18:12:18 No.74299055 1672851915164812.jpg 25 KB JPG >you're so handsome anon >All I can see is my ugly self >You have such an amazing deep voice anon >cringe whenever I hear myself Why. I just want to know why I I don't see what everyone else is seeing. Is it just that they can see how depressed I am and are just trying to make me feel better?

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