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: Anonymous 455 KB PNG 08/18/23(Fri)00:59:42 No.74422603 > Be me at college orientation > Theres a group activity to meet new people and try to make some friends >God dammit >pair up with this other guy who seemed pretty chill but also sporty >after an awkward pause he asks me if I saw the game last night >autism kicks in >never watched sports but I said I did unfortunately see the game >Why was it unfortunate he asks me > Make some s--- up about there were a lot of bad plays and the refs made some dumb calls >says he agrees with that, it honestly could have gone better >Feel like I'm doing a good job bullshitting >Asked him what he thought of the game and which team was his favorite >long pause I want to die >"Actually bro, I didn't see the game. I was just feeling awkward and wanted to make some small talk" >We were f------ bullshitting each other about a nonexistent game

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

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Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect Settings Mobile Home Anonymous (ID: zUo4dzyy) 03/20/25(Thu)15:39:22 No.501020304 43 KB PNG >Invent Wokeness >Spread Wokeness to the entire world >Stop being woke while the rest of the world goes to s--- Did America just troll the entire world?

: Anonymous 30 KB JPG 03/19/25(Wed)15:40:34 No.932673980 >be me >work same job for almost 10 years now >get new african co-workers >barley speaks english >says he's solmoli or some s--- >one day see him just sitting at his desk staring at his computer >see he's just staring at pics of neanderthals on google images >ask him what he's doing >he points at screen >"neanderthal white peep-pol descendants" >homosapiens black peep-pol descendants" >"we'ze are superior" >call him a retard and go back to work >he looks at pics of neanderthals all day >fw 3 days and I get pulled into HR >HR is chewing me out for calling him a retard >try to explain my side of things >HR wasn't having any of it >get written up >have to take a dumb 2 week sensitivity online class

Anonymous 3 KB JPEG 20/03/2025, 7:22:52 pm No.89703351 > go to bed at like 11:50 PM cause i'm stressed out of my arse > have dream about onigiri > wake up at 2:40 AM > pants feel wet > expect to have p----- myself like a five year old > its c-- What does this mean bros? I don't even like onigiri that much.

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Anon loves being a zoomer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/13/23(Sun)18:01:01 No.74367824 EAT SLEEP R--- REPEAT Global Blue E Global Blue Global Blue 1685630608107657.jpg 2.56 MB JPG >Wake up >j------- >hit my strawberry kiwi elfbar >boot up pirated Skyrim anniversary edition its good to be a zoomer

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Anon is chad....... | /r/Greentext

7 KB JPG >am Chad >get Stacys whenever I want >betafag roommate >introduces me to 4chan >lose all my friends, my family start to hate me and I never get p---- again Thanks F------

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Anon fucks up | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 531 KB JPG 07/13/22(Wed)11:10:02 No.881955464 >Be me >Tired of the r--- dwarf hurting innocent lives >Invent time machine and go back in time to kill it's mother before it has even been conceived >Meet young female dwarf >Fall in love >Have sex >She gets pregnant >Realization sets in >WhatHavelDone.png

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Femanon is a shit person | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 107 KB JPG 09/02/22 (Fri)17:56:51 No.884961353 >be me >24 y/o femanon, been f------ the same guy for 6 years >never had much sexual experience outside my bf >bf decides to join the military >i can finally unleash my inner slut >fast forward to now >bf has been deployed for six months, told him when he gets back i will marry him >i have already f----- at least 15 guys while he was gone >while hes out there in the field suffering, probably gonna die, i've been out here living the dream >life is good He has no idea ive been cheating on him Imao

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1) Denial. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 743 KB JPG 08/03/22(Wed)09:56:07 No.51098963 SHE IS NOT A GUY YOU CAN NOT CONVINCE ME THIS IS A GUY. ITS A HER. ITS A SHE. IM NOT GAY THIS IS A GIRL A GROWN WOMAN EVEN REPEAT AFTER ME GIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIR LGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGI RLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLG IRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRL GIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIR LGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGIRLGI RLGIRLGIRLGIRL

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The worst is people getting offended by "retard". Bunch of fucking retards. | /r/Greentext

3 KB PNG 4chan >Call someone a f----- >At worst they call you a f----- back >That's that Reddit >Call someone a f----- >"I thought that in this day and age we wouldn't have to deal with homophobia my grandfather was a leather daddy in the 50s and he had AIDS and that's ok and multiculturalism is great and I love b--------- and... Etc >You have been banned fro r/whatever please suck our d---- to come back Redditors can't even handle entry-level banter, they're like the preschoolers of the internet.

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Anon watches capeshit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/16/23(Wed)14:43:49 No.188809055 the-suicide-squad-viola-davis-is-returning-as-amanda-waller_vrr2.jpg 89 KB JPG >What if Superman had decided to fly down, rip off the roof of the White House, and grab the President right out of the Oval Office? >That's why you need a guy with a gun, a 5'6" girl with a baseball bat, another guy with a gun, a guy with some boomerangs, an MS13 mestizo with a lighter, a crocodile, a guy who can climb really well, a 5'2" girl with a sword and an archeologist who turned into a weird zombie witch (oh by the way she betrayed us immediately)... >...you know, to stop Superman. So where's my off-the- books funding?

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Anon doesn't like sharks. | /r/Greentext

13h (8/17 5:15) 4594711 24 Re - 3 Img PNG. 37KB (684 × 449) · 1662177610233355.png 4 Replies >it was just a test bite >the person just looked like a seal >sharks aren't dangerous, they're just living torpedoes with teeth that are so adept at killing that they've existed for almost a billion years 13h (8/17 5:18). 4594715 2 Replies >>4594711 (OP) >it's totally fine that apex predators are going extinct because once in a blue moon they attack humans by accident shut the f--- up

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Anon robs a gas station. | /r/Greentext

4 KB JPG >be me >broke as f--- about to rob this gas station >push the door open and this f------ geek is behind the counter >ez.png >pull my gun out and tell the tard to give me all the money >he's f------ smiling the whole time like he wanted to get robbed >nervous.jpeg >he flips his hat back amd puts on these sick shades and screams the words "ITS NERF OR NOTHING!!!" >"the sacred words..." i manged to let out >im terrified and drop everything >he pulls the trigger and im not there anymore >im in a carriage in the woods drawn by 2 horses and my hands are bound >this a------ looks at me and says "hey, you! you're finally awake? you were trying to cross the border, right?" >f------ todd howard, you've done it again Dont rob gas statioms, lesson learned

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are self-posts allowed here | /r/Greentext

File: image_2023-08-17_030400038.png (208 KB, 1000x1000) w-- Anonymous 08/17/23(Thu)03:04:08 No.904465602 >be me> >be watching yt at 3am> >see le familiar image> >realization.jpg> >its a photo from my insta> >my insta is privated> >reverse image search it> >200+ results, all match> >oldest ones predate my photo by 7 years> w-- /b/ is time travel real?

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Anons spider senses are tingling | /r/Greentext

44 KB JPG >never shave d--- and balls >have really gross but warm balls >have a spider nest in my ball pubes >every 2-3 weeks little spiderlings hatch and it feels really funny and tingly >sometimes they go in my pee hole and i have to pee them out and it feels good anybody else do this?

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Checkmate Americans | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/17/23(Thu)04:50:47 640 KB PNG No.186146093 do euros really think we're jealous of them? you have literally nothing we want. : Anonymous >>186146093 (OP) # >you have literally nothing we want. foreskins 08/17/23(Thu)04:54:11 No.186146189 >>186146215 # >>186146254 #

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Greentext Stories - two anons bullshit each other | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous 455 KB PNG 08/18/23(Fri)00:59:42 No.74422603 > Be me at college orientation > Theres a group activity to meet new people and try to make some friends >God dammit >pair up with this other guy who seemed pretty chill but also sporty >after an awkward pause he asks me if I saw the game last night >autism kicks in >never watched sports but I said I did unfortunately see the game >Why was it unfortunate he asks me > Make some s--- up about there were a lot of bad plays and the refs made some dumb calls >says he agrees with that, it honestly could have gone better >Feel like I'm doing a good job bullshitting >Asked him what he thought of the game and which team was his favorite >long pause I want to die >"Actually bro, I didn't see the game. I was just feeling awkward and wanted to make some small talk" >We were f------ bullshitting each other about a nonexistent game

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