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Board /adv/ - Advice Anonymous Girl Called the Police on Me a(...) You're in her dms I'm on her block list. We are not the same. 856 KB JPG >be me >29 years old >work as lifeguard Settings Mobile Home 10/08/23(Sun)16:02:12 No.29917260 >constantly surrounded by hot Zoomers and it's driving me nuts >Talk to girls because everyone says that if you just talk to girls they'll like you >they brush me off and ignore me, treat me like I don't exist >get one girls number from the employee contact list >18 year old highschool student >message her asking if she wants to meet with me >she asks "who this is" >I say "you'll find out when you meet me" >keep talking but she keeps saying "who the f--- is this??" >I was 3 beers deep when I said this so maybe a mistake "the man who admires your sexy f------ ass everyday" >"oh really, that's so hot" she responds >ohshititworked.exe >"sent me a picture of your face, I'm horny and want something to get myself off" >I send her my selfie >she says "thanks lol" >called the cops on me and showed the selfie 11 Replies / 1 Image I was talked to my the police and fired from my job for this, the police say if I keep messaging her I can get arrested View Thread

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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File size: 221 KB

Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

>she stops me, wants to roleplay >blindfolds me, we're playing doctor >kinky but okay >feel pressure around my ass >pull off blindfold 00 Anonymous (ID: zuq0 ITT: Weird sex experiences >be 22 >start dating blonde. 7/10 >shes quirky but fun > dat ass >second date >go to her place >shewantstheD.jpeg >go down on her >things are going well >crazy bitch is shoving 3-4 plastic horses into my a------ >she says my condition is "stable"

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E = McD² proof | /r/Greentext

>Female Friend claims she can't lose weight despite eating like 1000 kcal below her TDEE >F------ jump in telling her it's for sure her Hormones 26 KB JPG >Tell her how it is, she's almost certainly eating more than she thinks >Mention a f------ meal she had a few days ago that by itself was at least 1.5k kcal >Now I'm the a------

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Anon is tired of the internet | /r/Greentext

File: FA597155-E303-4B17-955F-3().jpg (206 KB, 900x873) Anonymous 10/19/23(Thu)13:58:11 No.75115 [Reply] >use reddit >get banned by retarded mods constantly but they dont do anything about the trolls >use 4chan >nothing but p--- and garbage now >try to sign up for a forum and it requires a f------ application >get denied for using a vpn >entire internet full of women zoomers and normies now

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Anon Gets a Haircut | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/18/23(Wed)19:20:28 No.191128205 >>191124052 # >only one hairsalon in my town >has a couple of cute girls working there 118 KB JPG >work up courage to get a haircut >everything goes fine, even manage to do some smalltalk without completely spilling spaghetti >suddenly some other girl that works there bursts trough the door crying >apparently one of their coworkers just died in an accident >all the girls working there start crying and comforting eachother >other customers excuse themselves, and leave the shop >tfw I sat in a chair for 60+ mins in a corner of the salon with a half shaven head, not knowing what to do, acting like I didn't hear the commotion, waiting for my hairstylist to return...

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Anon doesn't like Angela Anaconda | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/02/18(Sat)21 27 36 No 10088572310000714212 File Angelamon.ang (174 KB, 476x334) ANGELA ANACONDA DIGINVOLVE TO ANGELAMON Anonymous 06/03/18(Sun)19:55:16 No.100907187 >>100907497 >>100907802 >>100908080 >>100885723 This short caused my parent's divorce Anonymous 06/03/18(Sun)20:51:57 No. 100908080 >>100907187 Ok you have my attention. How? Anonymous 06/04/18(Mon)00:17:14 No.100910965 >>100907497 >>100907802 >>100908080 Didn't know at the time that parents relationship was rocky >I beg to go see Digimon movie >Parents agree but I don't realize it's for them to spend some time together as well >Get to theater and excited about Digimon flick >Can even afford popcom and drinks >100910965 Parents look happy >Angela Anaconda short comes on >Parents also dont speak very good English >My lil boy mind can't comprehend all the f--- going on >Parents are utterly confused by this Canadian f--- running around in a Digimon suit I start crying and they pull me out of the theater >Mom and Dad start blaming each other for going to the wrong film >Dad throws away the popcorn Mom wanted >Lots of arguing and I'm sul crying >Get out to parking lot and drive off in a rush >Get into an accident in parking lot >Dad moves out a month later F------ bitch of a w---- Angela Anaconda ruined my life

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Flawless Parjeet victory | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/19/23(Thu)04:56:40 No.188837175 1599883094015.png 53 KB PNG >did you know we beat your limey asses in the battle of chadaqooodoowaddick in 1672 did you know i don't give a f--- mate 10/19/23(Thu)04:58:09 No.188837238 : Anonymous >>188837175 (OP) # Then why did you make a thread about it? >>188837405 # >>188839274 # >>188839312 # >>188840198 # >>188840238 # >>188840387 # >>188840692 # >>188840757 # >>188841020 # >>188841065 # >>188843409 # >>188843426 # >>188843427 # >>188843437 # >>188843500 # >>188843512 # >>188843544 # >>188843642 # >>188843650 # >>188843971 #

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Anon goes to a party | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 2016-07-04 14:29:03 Post No.17882174 [Report] Image search: [Google] >>17882078 >high school 1 MB, 480x270 >go to a party and try to not be socially awkward >meet a group of people I semi know and just stick with them >a friend of a friend that I dont really known is in the group, talk with her a bit >we get along really well, kind of hit it off >towards the end of the party her and I are sitting outside by a fire just chilling when I here somebody scream "REBECCA WHAT THE F---" >turn around expecting to see a chad and I get the exact opposite >literal neck beard, chubby kid with a f------ fedora >hear her mutter "oh f------ christ" >he marches over, trying to regain composure >"hey uh..hey I thought..you and and I were doing something tonight" >...no, no we're not. Look devin Im not interested can you please just stop with this" >he looks at me >"and who is this" >im like "and who the f--- is asking" >long story short if you cant figure out the obvious he thought they were a couple and she doesnt want anything to do with him, has told him multiple times and he wont stop >after that night he set his sights on me >for the next two months he would start harassing me, small stuff at first >ding dong ditching, egged my car. it was almost comical >then it go worse >slashed my tires, left death threats stappled to my door and roadkill on my porch >ask the girl about this, said he was the same with her and "didnt take no for an answer" >f---.that. >find out where he lives, wait for him to come outside and I corner him >give him the whole "if I see you again ill f------ murder you" hardcore tough guy thing >he ended up moving away before anything happened in hindsight it was both pathetic and disturbing

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Anon refuses. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/19/23(Thu)00:04:04 No.75112725 >see interesting video essay >click 58 KB JPG >woman starts speaking >instantly close tab Why am I like this? I just realized for my ENTIRE LIFE I have refused to watch any youtube video made or voiced by a woman

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Why would Japanon of all people say this? Its so over | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: HNXHfKMQ 10/19/23(Thu)05:04:19 No.445417295 1670575440165412.jpg 148 KB JPG >>445417011 (OP) # why don't they have mechs yet >>445417859 # >>445419425 # >>445419663 # >>445420032 # >>445420468 # Anonymous (ID: 17g2K1x7 >>445417295 # Mechs are stupid. >waste of resources 10/19/23(Thu)05:09:09 No.445417859 >greatly increase collateral damage >just so you can fire a rifle that's 200x bigger than a normal one

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Anon is a founder | /r/Greentext

Anonymous FORTUN SITTARD Sittard 12/19/18 (Wed)16:07:18 No.787709517 >be 50 years ago >in school, netherlands >there were tards back then believe it or not > tard gets up in middle of class and lets out high frequency ree 16 KB JPG >starts having a seizure >i had a deep voice even as a teen >yell "SIT, TARD" >tard immediately sits down and behaves normal >mfw i told a tard to sit and it brought me fortune, became popular kid etc >decide to establish football club >Fortuna Sittard, est July 1st 1968 pic related

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Anon finds a cure for porn addiction | /r/Greentext

Anonymous cat helps me quit addiction 250 KB JPG >be me >addicted to jerking off >try to quit, can't >decide to get cat >cat starts sleeping in room >feels weird jerking off with cat in room >feels like i'm always being watched and judged >stop jerking off >not addicted anymore 10/19/23(Thu)06:19:31 No.907909481 >thank you kitty pic related, it's my cat 3 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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It's not that easy being green | /r/Greentext

B 1.35 MB PNG >Read greentext about some fat retard the OP knew >Fat retard had a pet lizard >Fat retard abused lizard by making it obese >Have a pet lizard myself, so instantly feel bad for it >Cont. reading >Fat retard apparently killed lizard after stepping on it >Feel sad now >Tell lizard that I won't do that to him >Doesn't understand a word I say, but that doesn't bother me >Still love my little scaly retard

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You can't spell cyberpunk without "statutory" | /r/Greentext

Lucy meets the chancla Build.jpg 86 KB JPG >Come on Gloria, let's talk about this, I swear I never touched your son that way and I'm only a couple of years older than him haha, I could be his girlfriend hahaNO, GLORIA, PUT THE FLIP FLOP DOWN THERE'S NO NEED FOR THAT >>243979433 # Anonymous 10/17/22(Mon)15:22:38 No.243979433 >>243979261 # >I told you there's be consequences for your actions chinita

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Greentext Stories - Anon isn't on Baywatch | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

Board /adv/ - Advice Anonymous Girl Called the Police on Me a(...) You're in her dms I'm on her block list. We are not the same. 856 KB JPG >be me >29 years old >work as lifeguard Settings Mobile Home 10/08/23(Sun)16:02:12 No.29917260 >constantly surrounded by hot Zoomers and it's driving me nuts >Talk to girls because everyone says that if you just talk to girls they'll like you >they brush me off and ignore me, treat me like I don't exist >get one girls number from the employee contact list >18 year old highschool student >message her asking if she wants to meet with me >she asks "who this is" >I say "you'll find out when you meet me" >keep talking but she keeps saying "who the f--- is this??" >I was 3 beers deep when I said this so maybe a mistake "the man who admires your sexy f------ ass everyday" >"oh really, that's so hot" she responds >ohshititworked.exe >"sent me a picture of your face, I'm horny and want something to get myself off" >I send her my selfie >she says "thanks lol" >called the cops on me and showed the selfie 11 Replies / 1 Image I was talked to my the police and fired from my job for this, the police say if I keep messaging her I can get arrested View Thread

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April 2025 4chan Sharty Hack And Janitor Email Leak

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