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: Anonymous _ESA ROPA SIMPLEMENTE NO PODIA 03/24/24(Sun)23:05:47 No.915858640 >20 year old >friends with a girl in college >met about a year ago >she's had feelings for me from SOPORTARLO. the start and is always trying to make me her boyfriend but I'm not interested in her, she's just a cool girl and friend 60 KB JPG >a couple of weeks ago I send her a d--- pic just to cocktease her for fun/for an ego boost (I'm around 9 inches and know how to anglemaxx to look even bigger) >she seems to become more obsessed with me afterwards but I don't take it too seriously >yesterday she tells me that she'll spread the pictures around to as many people as she can unless I date her Life has suddenly become a lot more stressful. I don't enjoy being blackmailed. : Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)23:31:49 No.915859630 >>915858640 (OP) # just f--- her retard >>915859925 #

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Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon went to protestant church | /r/Greentext

THS Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)21:04:29 No.915837060 >be me, catholic >>915837339 >>915837344 >>915837672 >have gf (protestant) who has recently turned back to the faith and intends to convert to catholicism >has accompanied me to Sunday mass a couple of times >yesterday, asked me if I'd want to go to her childhood protestant church this Sunday to see the differences >ok why not >we arrive, neatly dressed like usual, her in a nice dress and me in a suit and tie >literally everyone else is dressed like a total slob >like 30% of the other attendees are wearing sweatpants >mass commences >bunch of new age songs no one, not even the other attendees, really know the lyrics of so barely anyone sings along >sermon begins >literally a half hour monologue about Ukraine and Russia (a conflict that is now two years old) >called Russia (not Putin, just Russia in general) the "ultimate evil" >said Alexei Navalny is a Jesus-like figure who got killed for his faith >praised Zelensky (a jew) as the "ultimate defender of Christianity" > lamented about the Pope's recent call for peace between Ukraine and Russia, said there can never be peace aside from an unconditional Russian surrender >closed by praising Israel for their heroic defense against Hamas terrorists, but I didn't even pay too much attention anymore at that point are all protestant churches like this? even gf was shocked as she didn't remember it being this way.

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Make sure to pay a subscription and not buy outright | /r/Greentext

terminal wojak.png 170 KB PNG >........ I wish i consumed more media..... *BEEEEEEEEEEEP*........

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op takes matters into his own hands | /r/Greentext

File: gt 3.14 goth chick.jpg (20 KB, 236x393) God is Bu A help ☐ robots how do i stalk a girl and make it seem normal? Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)16:23:12 No. 76891774 >>76891781 >be 17 >qt 3.14 goth girl from my school >massive f------ crush, like it's ungodly >catches me staring all the time >think she thinks i hate her >give up fast forward a year >find name in year book >decide look up name on le hacker website >find a whole bunch of personal information (bitch cannot hide her stuff) >find address >decide to go to her house, to maybe smooth things over >comes out >does not like that >starts yelling >yells for father >father comes out, and starts yelling to >father punches me in the face, and i run away typing this as i s-- in my car. how do i smooth this over, and make it up to her? i really like her bros. picrel, very high resemblance to her

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Anon on Christianity | /r/Greentext

1028224F-6AE1-4BA3-B5BB-23F0253D4C7E.jpg 19 KB JPG >Conversation about Christian Theology >ACKTCHUALLY, Your god, YHWY, is actually the descendant of the ancient Pennsylvanian god PooPooPeepaloo, and his wife is the Goddess of Asshshart, who descended from the moon (goddess Lumariel) to teach them the art of Insert- Two-Fingers-Into/As, which is why you celebrate easter. (ASCHSHART = Easter). According to *HERETIC DENOUNCED BY THE CHURCH 1600 YEARS AGO, you guys actually have your whole theology wrong and my retarded retcon fanfic from r/Mythology is more accurate about Zoroaster and Pazuzu than the entire ecclesiastical authorities have ever known about Christ. Why?

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I tried watching 1 of his video and it’s literally true | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/20/22(Fri)23:48:11 No.68714289 8 KB JPG >hey guys it's critical >today we are taking yet another clip from my live stream of me watching a youtube video that somebody else made and getting a million views for what little I add in words with my boring dry tired voice >also, for comedic effect, I will stretch the image on the youtube thumbnail for the billionth time >please laugh

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Anon hates this trope | /r/Greentext

File: 1710633694657591.jpg (36 KB, 512x468) Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)13:37:34 No. 197582701 >>197582751 >>197582764 >>197582915 >>197582960 >Character walks into a bar >Orders a "beer"

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Employee is based af | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 189 KB PNG 03/24/24(Sun) 23:14:21 No.76890460 >new guy at work >kind of weird and retarded but nice and polite >talk to him during lunch >turns out he does art >he explains his universe and characters >notice something >the good and light faction are all tall plus huge boobs >the dark evil ones are short with small boobs >he doesn't comment on it at all, completely engrossed in his lore Yeah I'm gonna stick with that guy

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Anon is reseting his bro to default settings | /r/Greentext

mous (ID: NUзtoXWn) VIP 11/29/20(Sun)23:44:19 No.29389357 I have been putting testosterone pills in my gay brothers food and drinks for about 2 months now and he is starting to like women more. AMA

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Many such gay cases | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Is this guy closeted too?? 10 KB PNG >be me 03/24/24(Sun)15:48:31 No.30951550 >20m UK closeted bisexual >drinking with friends at someone's house for hours >we are all very drunk >time to sleep >sitting on upstairs living room floor next to a guy friend who is outwardly very homophobic and masculine but also basically an incel >can't remember how it was initiated but we start holding hands in the dark >continue holding hands in the dark while talking to others in the room >we squeeze each other's hand while holding them together and I use my thumb to rub the outside of his hand >without clearly thinking I stop holding his hand and start massaging his head >he doesnt react negatively at all and we continue talking to the others in the room while i rub his head in the dark >go back to holding hands >i decide to leave the room and sleep downstairs I know that this situation was pretty much me not suppressing my sexuality due to the influence of alcohol, but what does it say about the other guy? I'm certain that I was more drunk than he was. I never had any intention to do anything like that and I would never have thought he could be closeted.......

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anon wants some takeaway | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 681 KB GIF 1/29/2023, 10:19:16 AM No.11538405 > want to order take-out Mongolian food > google "Mongolian food xyz street" > no results > google "Mongolian food my city" > no results > know exactly where place is, zoom in on google maps > no results, doesn't display store > get frustrated, drive there and order at counter > phone dings > "Rate your Mongolian Food!" Why is everything worse now than it was in 2011

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Anon gets cheated on by his wife | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 63 KB JPG 03/24/24(Sun)12:06:59 No.915845026 >had a wife of 2 years >we never went through each other's phones >she asks me to grab hers from other room one day >front and center, suggestive texts from another woman >snoop through it later, she is brazenly cheating on me with a lesbian woman, let's call her Elise >completely lied to her about being married to me, claimed to be a "gold star" lesbian or whatever they call it >sent screenshots of convo to myself >sent Elise a selfie from my phone with my wife not paying attention in the background with the message, “she's been lying to us both. I'm her husband." >we coordinated after that, I sat with Elise at a restaurant after my wife set up a secret date with her >my wife was pale as a ghost seeing us together, immediately turned to leave the restaurant >divorce was a blur from there >Elise became my friend, very mentally supportive through it >turns out lesbians are the absolute best wingmen you could ever ask for >eventually introduced me to my new gf, even more compatible and much less toxic than my ex wife Cheating wives are temporary, lesbian friends are eternal

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Anon is super straight | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 153 KB PNG 10/16/20(Fri)21:09:23 No.838004040 >be me >21 >super straight male >get horny one night and decide to go use the local glory hole >actually kinda enjoy it >half way through person on the otherside moans >it's a guy's moan >realize ive been sucking a man's c--- this entire time mfw

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Greentext Stories - Anon is blackmailed | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous _ESA ROPA SIMPLEMENTE NO PODIA 03/24/24(Sun)23:05:47 No.915858640 >20 year old >friends with a girl in college >met about a year ago >she's had feelings for me from SOPORTARLO. the start and is always trying to make me her boyfriend but I'm not interested in her, she's just a cool girl and friend 60 KB JPG >a couple of weeks ago I send her a d--- pic just to cocktease her for fun/for an ego boost (I'm around 9 inches and know how to anglemaxx to look even bigger) >she seems to become more obsessed with me afterwards but I don't take it too seriously >yesterday she tells me that she'll spread the pictures around to as many people as she can unless I date her Life has suddenly become a lot more stressful. I don't enjoy being blackmailed. : Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)23:31:49 No.915859630 >>915858640 (OP) # just f--- her retard >>915859925 #

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