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Anonymous 130 KB JPG 01/30/22(Sun)21:12:11 No.871689869 >YES HUMANS ARE COMPLETELY CAPABLE OF MAKING THIS ON THEIR OWN FROM SCRATCH. >WELL MAYBE ACTUALLY 15 PEOPLE ON EARTH >NO YOU CAN'T MEET THEM NOR KNOW THEIR NAMES >"TSMC" FACTORY LOCATED IN "TAIWAN" MAKES 98% OF ALL CHIPS IN THE WORLD, FROM CARS, AIRPLANES OR FRIDGES >NO YOU CAN'T GO TO TAKE A LOOK IN THE FACTORY BECAUSE..YOU JUST CAN'T OKAY >TAIWAN DOES EXIST, JUST LOOK AT GOOGLE STREET VIEW OKAY totally not aliens btw 15 Replies / 6 Images View Thread

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

>she stops me, wants to roleplay >blindfolds me, we're playing doctor >kinky but okay >feel pressure around my ass >pull off blindfold 00 Anonymous (ID: zuq0 ITT: Weird sex experiences >be 22 >start dating blonde. 7/10 >shes quirky but fun > dat ass >second date >go to her place >shewantstheD.jpeg >go down on her >things are going well >crazy bitch is shoving 3-4 plastic horses into my a------ >she says my condition is "stable"

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Anon discovers fibre | /r/Greentext

Anonymous ytho 211 KB JPG 08/16/16(Tue)12:24:09 No.699763279 >be fat >go to /fit/ and find a solution >main problem is i eat like a dumpster >apparently things with loads of fiber is going to save my filthy soul >"Fiber is digested slowly, leaving you feeling full longer, and helps with digestion" >go out and buy two boxes of fiber-heavy breakfast bars >the first day i have fiber bars for breakfast, lunch and a lot of snacks >i dont s--- that day >next day i fiber myself up even more >i dont s--- that day either >fiber jesus is surely working his magic in my colon >can feel the pounds dropping off because im not very hungry anymore >i dont s--- the third day >i dont s--- the fourth day >thefinaldaydawns.mp3 >i have my morning coffee and feel my insides rumble in that familiar way >the second i hit the toilet the weirdest fart in the world exits me >it's whistling >just a thin, continuous airstream of fart that smells like grandpapas coffin >no sound other than the whistling hiss >suddenly stops >the hole is plugged >SOS >this s--- is so solid it feels like i'm giving a--- birth to Dwayne "The rock" Johnson >hang on to the shower curtain and pray >the rock is shot out of my a------ at mach speed >my entire ass is covered in toilet water >now the fun begins >a fart that could do more damage to the ozone layer than aerosol ever did is shooting s--- bullets out of me >solid and prefectly round nuggets >the smell is killing me >blacking out >the thuds of nuggets shooting around the bowl propelled by my insane fiber flatulence is giving me war flashbacks >iwasntevenin'nam.jpeg >my guts are yelling in german >sounds like a moose in heat lives in my belly >most of the s--- isn't even digested at this point >just forced out by all the gas that had been building up to my throat >after an hour it finally seems to be over >im shivering and crying >both legs collapse as i try to stand up >my stomach hitting the bathroom tiles forces one last trumpet >gondorcallsforaid.rar >shakily wipe my ass >completely clean

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Licence to Confuse | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous GET OUT OF MY WAY 122 KB PNG and speeding up >finally pass ▼Settings Mobile Home 09/27/24(Fri)15:47:24 No.78946013 >Driving the speed limit >NPC in front of me is driving 10mph under >try to get around - can't >start tail gating just a little bit to let them know I want to go faster. I want to go the speed limit ffs >finally see an opening >NPC speeds up to 10mph over the speed limit so I cant pass >Now I look like a spazoid on the road swerving >NPC starts flashing high beams at me Why do so many of these people exist? Every single day with this s---. If you drive exactly the speed limit or under you shouldn't be allowed to drive. It worries me that you're so much of a p----. Are you afraid of the dark too? Does baby need his baba before beddy time? I should legally be able to pit maneuver you. Same thing with people who drive their tractors on the road, you're making me hate farmers. Why should I support farmers when they do nothing but piss me off. Mod your f------ tractor so it can match the speed limit of a normal road, why the f--- are you driving at walking speed down an arterial road you f------ pea brain inbred donkey f-----. f--- im so f------ mad right now. I hate NPCs

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Anon's Musk | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous ▼Settings Mobile Home 09/28/24(Sat)04:29:14 No.78951229 >every time i scratch my junk i smell my hand afterward what does it mean? 132 KB JPG Anonymous 09/28/24(Sat)04:31:14 No.78951238 nothing wrong with a little musk check now and then

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The genie light | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/04/22(Wed)19:00:06 No.2543988 >genie light comes on >wish for infinite wishes >engine explodes file.png 75 KB PNG shouldnt have tried to fool him >>25439915 # >>25441515 # >>25444652 # >>25447053 # >>25455269 #

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Lost Resort | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 09/28/24(Sat)05:51:56 No.78951626 >Called "Rhode Island" >Clearly not an Island Are they retarded? 138 KB PNG

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We need to go back to being judgemental | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/26/24(Thu)22:29:41 No.690121947 VIL 1726806464649645.jpg 181 KB JPG >i----- is now mainstream thing what happened?

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Anon is definitely a sperg | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 124 my argument you me 119 KB JPG probably a sperg 09/27/24(Fri)23:03:39 No.78946710 >get in trouble for drawing guns in school >forced to be evaluated by school counselor >tell her i just like guns and drawing >she's convinced it's a coping mechanism >she tells my parents i'm >fastforward 10 years >can't hold down a job, always get fired after a few months >decide to live in a car for fun >do crimes for money, get caught after a few years >dad is convinced it's because of assburgers, tells my whole family >everyone thinks i'm a retard now >go to the psychologist >makes me take a personality test >answer 4 questions in an hour >turns out it's a 50 question test that takes 15 min. >next time i come in, she does a mini intelligence test >after i finish, she tells me i got almost everything right, most people never even finish because of the time limit >i didn't even know there was a time limit in the first place >she says i'm not autistic, i'm literally too smart for others to understand >now i have to get an IQ test such is the life of an IQcel like me.

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Anon plays cricket | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 714912237 >be me >6'2" white dude >phone bill is due >use Cricket >used a fake name for the account because they don't check ID >don't remember what it is >go to Cricket store >black dude working >give him my number >he looks up my name with my phone number >"Tyrone Watermelon" >ohfuck.jpg >he looks shocked >looks up at me >"your name is Tyrone Watermelon?" >straight face >"Yes." >"really?" >"Yeah." >pay my bill >all he can say is "...have a nice day" >leave >mfw

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Considering some of the phases I went through, this isn't too bad | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/10/18(Fri)18:26:22 No.47414971 1524085735334.jpg 122 KB JPG >tfw had a general grievous phase when i was younger >would wrap a blanket around my shoulders like a cape while walking around hunched over coughing and doing the voice i-i wasn't the only one right?

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Having fun isn't hard when you've got a library card | /r/Greentext

File: Bookshelf_JE4_BE2.png (5 KB, 300x300) ☐ Anonymous 09/30/20(Wed)20:41:46 No.526745842 >>526746342 >>526747310 >>5 >small shelf of books takes longer to make than a portal to another dimension >> Anonymous 09/30/20(Wed)20:44:31 No.526746141 >>526746301 >>526746545 Its because books are portals to the dimension of imagination. Anonymous 09/30/20(Wed)20:46:07 No.526746301 >>526746141 f--- off librarian >>526746545

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Fiery Ambush | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Crimean War Date Crimean War Attack on the Mask by me 18 October 1855-30 Mards 1950 years 5 months and 2 weeks) Location Cart Cart Result Sea Bbc S Who Sea East Netay Territorial Russa loses the Danube Dan changes ed Kroon Settra mad Belligerents 195 KB PNG 07/19/24(Fri)08:32:05 No.16867858 >Be Russia >Demand the Ottomans let you be in charge of your christian minority >"no w--" >Take the Danubian Principalities >Brtian and France come over and kick your s--- in w-- was their problem? 07/19/24(Fri)09:41:49 No.16868024 : Anonymous >>16867858 (OP) # Anus.

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Anon remembers Toonami | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/21/21(Sat)21:30:53 No. 125267681 ALLS 1456937265985.jpg 32 KB JPG Toonami will never air >Hank: Propane Peggy >My Grilling Arlen Elementary >Boomhower: Princess Clean-Gas >Grilling Wars >Black Comedian >Hankruto: Proppuden

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Greentext Stories - Anon may know a bit too much | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous 130 KB JPG 01/30/22(Sun)21:12:11 No.871689869 >YES HUMANS ARE COMPLETELY CAPABLE OF MAKING THIS ON THEIR OWN FROM SCRATCH. >WELL MAYBE ACTUALLY 15 PEOPLE ON EARTH >NO YOU CAN'T MEET THEM NOR KNOW THEIR NAMES >"TSMC" FACTORY LOCATED IN "TAIWAN" MAKES 98% OF ALL CHIPS IN THE WORLD, FROM CARS, AIRPLANES OR FRIDGES >NO YOU CAN'T GO TO TAKE A LOOK IN THE FACTORY BECAUSE..YOU JUST CAN'T OKAY >TAIWAN DOES EXIST, JUST LOOK AT GOOGLE STREET VIEW OKAY totally not aliens btw 15 Replies / 6 Images View Thread

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