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Anonymous 04/25/24(Thu)19:57:32 No.14412580 >be me >get gf >she is a bit of a nerd >actually a huge Beavis n Butthead, and South Park mark >we start calling things 'gay' followed with tarded laughing >we do it randomly out of nowhere, usually one of us starts it calling something 'gay' and the other one goes with it >recently did it at cousin's wedding >when he kissed the bride, my gf started whispering "he kissed a girl, haha, gay, haha" >trying to hold back my laughter while whispering to her "haha gay, haha" >people in the row front of us turn around >see us giggling while saying "haha gay, haha" >next day cousin messages me some guests complimented him what a nice guy he is he allowed his tarded cousin and his autistic gf attend the wedding

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon is picky about his chicks | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/23/24(Mon) 17:38:09 No.205933750 1705937815633.jpg 72 KB JPG People are always like "Brazilians don't suffer because le hot girls" until they get here and see that 90% of women here actually look like this and not like the stereotypical model latina

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Anon doesn't have a merry Christmas | /r/Greentext

[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [ Auto] File: 53 3f9ce749393313556(...).png (28 KB, 357x313) 83/12/10 Anonymous (ID: ut94w3CO 12/25/24(Wed)08:59:03 No.492312671 >>492312759 >>492312835 >>492312904 >>492312966 >>492312976 >>492313058 >>492313130 >>492313192 >>492313208 >>492313319 >>492313525 >>492314252 >>492314580 >>492315020 >>492315089 >>492315099 >>492315173 >>492315209 >>492315990 >>492318353 >>492318435 >>492318570 >>492318674 >>492318935 >>492319182 >>492319219 >>492319493 >>492319578 >>492319634 >>492320026 >>492320046 >>492321370 >>492321787 >haven't seen my family for Christmas in 12 years >my mom always goes down to Arizona to see them >this year I saved up enough money and requested a week off so I could go visit >I was super excited to go >told my cousin on Facebook I was coming this year but got left on read >my mom called the next day and told me I need to stay home because they have a lot going on >I was disappointed but understood >open up snapchat this morning to see my mom's story >my brother, sister, cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents are all there >I'm the only one spending Christmas alone >my mom shortly deleted the story and called me a dozen times >they don't have a lot going on at all >I just wasn't invited

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Anon sucks at being gay | /r/Greentext

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Anon sees his dad | /r/Greentext

onymous 12/25/24(Wed)13:20:18 No.79854733 >saw my dad for the first time in a while >sudden urge to stop being a f------ loser 2-B 128 KB JPG Anonymous 12/25/24(Wed)13:22:09 No.79854754 Take advantage of that momentum, we always have those flashes where the spark comes back. >>79854784 # Anonymous >>79854754 # 12/25/24(Wed)13:25:23 No.79854784 it's been so long since i've had my s--- together but yeah good point

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Confirmed, Anon does not like women. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/30/22(Thu)07:18:57 No.881121178 Are you aroused by clown women? 813 KB JPG 7 Replies / 4 Images Anonymous >>881121178 (OP) # All women are clowns View Thread 06/30/22(Thu)08:20:34 No.881123573

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Anon looks for love at the border | /r/Greentext

Finding love is impossible bro. Dont even bother. >be me >live in city next to mexico border > also be me >leech-faced fat greasy unattractive human slime >can never find love or poonage >brainwave.exe >lot of undocumented illegals in my city >one of them must be desperate for US husband + papers >i'd happily eat burritos all day for guaranteed poonage >volunteer at ngo that gives free food to hungry illegals >also free food for me, save money for weed >pick an uglier one in the food line, more likely to say yes >only speaks spanish, tells me "esposo" when i keep staring and smiling at her >google says it means husband >partytime.gif >put my arm around her >she takes my phone and types in "tengo esposo" >this f------ dicktease is already married >turns out they all are here to meet up with their husbands, even the uglier ones >quits ngo job Honestly bros, im thinking of just ending it.

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Merry Christmas from North Korea | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/24/24(Tue)18:30:48 No.79843003 >you can't post and write comment If you have no enough karma >your post or comment removed by auto 1 KB PNG moderattor because your account not old enough >there have a way of gain karma write comment or post why this f------ app so annoying for new users ?

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anon remembers a retard | /r/Greentext

1/1 5SCu1LH8 (OP) -KN 54m (12/25/24 14:42) 492291735.7 Re - 0 Img JPG 127KB (981 x 981) threeeyepepe.jpg 4 Replies >Be me, 12 years old >New neighbors move in, kid has severe autism >Constant yelling, but completely incomprehensible- straight-up non-verbal turbo-autist >Kid keeps trying to escape the house; parents build a full prison-gate system on their outside stairs >They've got this elevated deck wrapping around the 2nd floor of their house >Sometimes see him out there just running in circles, like a GTA NPC stuck in a loop >Only way down if he can't unlock the gate? Jump off the deck AND HE JUST DOES IT. >Kid's like 200 lbs, lands like a sack of potatoes, barely even gets a scratch >Literal tank of a human being Fast forward to now. I've just finished all 10 episodes of The Telepathy Tapes (top 5 podcast on Apple/Spotify rn-look it up), and I feel like my brain just hit Ctrl+Alt+Del. What if he wasn't just some "retard"? What if he was literally operating on a higher plane of existence? Think about it: People assume non-verbal autists are "dumb" because they can't tie their shoes or talk. But tying shoes and speaking are fine motor skills—what if they're just too disconnected from the 3D world to use their body properly? Some of these guys have said things like, "I didn't even know I had a body" after learning to communicate via typing. These dudes are like prisoners in their own bodies--but at the same time, not really, because they're out here astral projecting and meeting at a place they call "The Hill." I'm not even memeing anymore. What if he wasn't “mindlessly" running on that deck? What if he was accessing some 4D hyperspace realm while his body was on autopilot? I feel like I've just unlocked a new conspiracy rabbit hole, and I need others to weigh in. Am I crazy, or are these guys literally in a different dimension?

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Anon has a gun story | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Gun stories thread? 104 KB JPG anon" 10/21/22(Fri)23:02:01 No.55750288 >get first gf at 24 >she's 21 >she still lives with her parents >she invites me to lunch with her parents and then back to their place to hang out >"The family wants to know you >father mean mugs me the entire time, mother is genuinely interested in what I do for a living >get back to their place >father invites me to sit down across the living room table from him >as he's sitting down he pulls out a gun and sets it down facing me >'tism activates, think he's inviting me to do the same >place my gun on coffee table too >"What're you trying to say there, boy?" >"I haven't even spoken yet though" >"You calling me a liar?" >"What?"

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Calm down, Doctor! Now's not the time for presents. That comes later. | /r/Greentext

File: dr "m claus.jpg (442 KB, 1229x683) Anonymous 12/24/24(Tue)18:59:08 No.207294575 ► Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the plane Not a creature was stirring, not even Bane The flight plan was filed with the agency with care CIA knowing the hostages wouldn't all reach there The prisoners were kneeling with bags on their heads With visions of sleighbells and crashing sleds And CIA in his polo, and I in my cap, Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap When out on the clouds there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the seat to see what was the matter. Away to the aisle I flew like a flash, Tore open the seatbelt and turned in a dash After shouting and shooting, and questions of Bane One interrupted Wilson, with self-satisfied disdain When, what, from under a hood should appear, But a man, with a mask, and soon it was clear Bigger than average, but still under detain, I knew in a moment it must have been Bane More rapid than eagles CIA's surprise came, And he pointed, and shouted, and called him by name "Bane?" he gasped, with shock and surprise As he realised his flightplan hadn't included this guise How vital was the mask, CIA began to wonder When it would soon sink in he had made such a blunder Pain would occur, although the target unclear Until Bane interjected with CIA's biggest fear For when told he was a big guy, Bane responded with glee That CIA feeling glum is how it would be Then it was revealed that the capture was intended And CIA's flight plane would need to be amended But then from behind, another plane appeared in the distance with Bane adding that he needed Pavel's assistance CIA's dismissal of Bane's success because his source of dreaded distress The plan was to crash, with all on board Presents and all, with Bane's freedom restored So Bane sprang from his seat, to his team gave a shout, And down they all slid into his masterplanned rout But I heard him exclaim, 'ere he rose out of sight, "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"

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Outskilled | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/22/24(Sun)08:00:36 No.698041706 POT OF GRID POT OF GREED Por OF GREED Pot of GREED PUT OF GREED Por OF GREED POT OF GREEDY POT OF GREED POT OF G POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED Pot of GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GR POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF CRIED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED Por or GED Pot of GRUD POT OF GLED Pot of GREED PUT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED POT OF GREED 1724880407753.jpg 647 KB JPG How do you respond without being mad?

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Brazilian Anon presents the theory of Latin American superiority | /r/Greentext

onymous (ID: SfcfHovR 7 KB JPG 12/24/24(Tue)14:30:28 No.492241094 The Latin American Superiority Theory >doesn't have as beautiful a model as Colombian Sara Salazar >there are no fantastic women like Brazilians Bruna Butterfly or Juliana Soares >or more recently Sayuri Mattar and Hotsolzinha >doesn't have a woman as beautiful as Chilean Melanie Scarleth Beauty is Latin American

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Greentext Stories - Anon's girlfriend is funny | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous 04/25/24(Thu)19:57:32 No.14412580 >be me >get gf >she is a bit of a nerd >actually a huge Beavis n Butthead, and South Park mark >we start calling things 'gay' followed with tarded laughing >we do it randomly out of nowhere, usually one of us starts it calling something 'gay' and the other one goes with it >recently did it at cousin's wedding >when he kissed the bride, my gf started whispering "he kissed a girl, haha, gay, haha" >trying to hold back my laughter while whispering to her "haha gay, haha" >people in the row front of us turn around >see us giggling while saying "haha gay, haha" >next day cousin messages me some guests complimented him what a nice guy he is he allowed his tarded cousin and his autistic gf attend the wedding

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