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Greentext Stories - anon has a tough day at the office | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous the struggle of the american m(...) 56 KB JPG 01/25/25(Sat)02:12:02 No.930440232 >start the day waking up from a coma on the beach >completely naked and covered in s--- >swill salt water >gotta start the day right >waddle to work at big pharma >run into parked cars for the sweet sweet insurance payout >gonna be rich >feminoid attempts to call the police >a foolish attempt >leap towards her on all fours and pound her with a rock >she doesn't get the grindset >stumble into big pharma mumbling about the grind, demand to be taken to my office >"someone call security" >tfw they don't recognise the king of big pharma >reach to my buttocks to grab a clod of man mud for throwing >god blessed his strongest soldier with quick thinking >computer guy thinks I'm pulling out a gun >get tazed in the balls for a minute >it's fine, they don't understand the grindset >sprint outside, run into nearest fast food store >soyboy cashier attempts to stop the 400lbs of freedom barrelling towards him >a foolish attempt >cashier is flattened and slips under my aerodynamic USAmerican folds >waddle straight towards the deep fryer >manifest destiny >stick hands into the burger frying juice >tfw it burns instead of recognising the king of big pharma >the ocean is my friend and will cleanse my wounds >waddle back to the beach and collapse under the immense pressure of a day at business god bless america

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