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"John", the interactive imperative interesting adventure

Last posted May 11, 2014 at 04:37AM EDT. Added Apr 06, 2014 at 06:54PM EDT
100 posts from 28 users

So since interactive adventure forum games have gained a boost in popularity due to "Poorly Drawn Stick Dude Quest", I decided to make my own poorly drawn adventure.
P.S. The naming of "John" was entirely coincidental, and has nothing to do with any other forum game adventure character of the same name.

Krusty Kreme wrote:

Eat poster.


John has no mouth, and therefore can not eat. Besides, who would want to eat that? It would taste all paper-y!

Last edited Apr 06, 2014 at 07:07PM EDT

That Glaceon wrote:


Attempt intercourse with the box.


John, once again, lacks the appropriate appendages to do so. However, he finds that the box's top loosens easily, and he flips it open. Inside is a weird red… thing.

the red thing is actually your wife, which is actually also a copy of Kanye West's My Weird Dark Twisted Fantasy.

you should look lovingly at your wife.

Last edited Apr 06, 2014 at 07:30PM EDT


John, despite being skeptical of the idea of loving a red ball thing, decides to kiss it out of the kindness of his heart.
[Click!]
What?
It appears that the thing was not a red ball, but a button! It opened a door that was behind the poster.

Last edited Apr 06, 2014 at 07:43PM EDT

Mandl Brought wrote:


John, despite being skeptical of the idea of loving a red ball thing, decides to kiss it out of the kindness of his heart.
[Click!]
What?
It appears that the thing was not a red ball, but a button! It opened a door that was behind the poster.

>Open door, and go through

­­­Alex Mercer wrote:

Dig a hole through the wall


John thinks a more straightforward approach would just to go through the door.

Last edited Apr 06, 2014 at 07:52PM EDT

Question how you were able to do that, at that height, without arms or a pencil in your inventory. Then question life itself.

Last edited Apr 06, 2014 at 08:28PM EDT

RandomMan wrote:

Question how you were able to do that, at that height, without arms or a pencil in your inventory. Then question life itself.

There's nothing to question, as John knows why: Plot convenience!

Mandl Brought wrote:

There's nothing to question, as John knows why: Plot convenience!

Question the plot, then question dat plot.

RandomMan wrote:

Question how you were able to do that, at that height, without arms or a pencil in your inventory. Then question life itself.

I don' know but I know the answer to the question of life itself.

MasterBurner "Capo" wrote:

Praise the sun. The sun will help you in your time of need.

What "sun"? John has not seen a "sun" since his spontaneous creation around a day ago, so he doesn't know if he should praise something he's never seen.


Yes, let's go through the doo-
Wait, what?
John, did you just break the spacetime continuum?

Last edited Apr 07, 2014 at 04:38PM EDT
Skeletor-sm

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